They walk among us....

[SoulTax]

and my wife's best friend is one of them.

So here is the background quickly. My wife and I have wanted a baby for a while now. A few years that is. We kept putting it off because I wanted us to be in a more stable financial position. We ended up moving to the UK because I earn far more here for my job and she can essentially stay off permanent work indefinitely after a baby is born.

Long story short, after a few hiccups and tests, we need to take some pills to assist the process. The doc describes the moment we should take the pills. The first month we miss this moment and so the chain effect is that that month is a dud. We write it off as not a fault of the process but a fault of following instructions.

The next month comes and we take everything on time. We shag like bunnies at the right times in the month, 4 weeks later she takes a test and finds out she is Preggers. We are obviously overjoyed. Essentially the first viable month that we could have conceived, we did. How lucky is that.

This was the culmination of some serious effort and research on my wife's part. Reading up on medical sights, finding out the right things to do and not to do. Pouring over forums and such, this was a triumph of human will and medical and scientific knowledge and advancement. We were chuffed to say the least. 60 years ago, a couple in our position would have either not had, or would have had the one fluke baby when she is like 40 or something. Wow medicine is great.

The point:
So she tells her best friend a few weeks later, as women do. This BF is over in SA still. Her precise reaction to the news is this: "Wow great man, you see I knew it. That doctor doesn't know what she is talking about, trying to give you guys pills and stuff, when all it took was me praying once and it happens. See God answers prayers".

She actually fully believed those words. Fully oblivious of the fact that without those drugs we would not have had a snowballs chance. Just attributing all this good news to her prayers being answered, but forgetting that according to her beliefs it was her deity that cursed us with this particular problem by design. And if not for medical advancement, we would have been childless for life.

As grateful as I am for someones thoughts and well wishes, and even prayers if that is what they think will help. I guess I was just a little taken aback by the realisation that sometimes that religious nut-job that we sometimes joke about, is a little closer to home than we realise.

[zippy]

Don't be too hard on your wife's friend. Sometimes been deluded can be quite fun.

[SoulTax]

Ya I know. She is actually quite a cool chick, although we have always thought that there was a little bit of crazy creeping around the edges of her personality.

[Slootvreter]

Yeah another dude was looking for a flat in Claremont, close to his work, and he found one (not exactly a needle in a haystack). So he goes on FB and proclaims that This was proof enough that God is listening to his prayers.

[cerebus]

That's quite a reaction towards someone who only wished the best for you.

[mooks]

Congrats on the pregnancy, however it came about

[copacetic]

Look, if it had been an immaculate conception, your wife's friend may have been on to something.

[AcidRaZor]

That's quite a reaction towards someone who only wished the best for you.

It also rubs me up the wrong way when others claim their prayers magically helped you when you know how hard you worked for the opportunity. I'm not dismissing the entire idea that it did or did not help, prayer has proved to have many significant positive effects, all I'm saying is put your feet in his shoes and then think of why he posted this. I think the point he tried to make is that she dismissed their effort and the use of drugs ENTIRELY.

A "joke" I've told before:

"A man prays everyday he wins the lotto as he really needs the money, down on his luck and can't sustain his small family anymore. One day he yells into the heavens, GOD WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME, WHY! ALL I HAVE EVER PRAYED FOR IS TO WIN THE LOTTO TO GET ME OUT OF THIS HELL. God suddenly answers, 'Dude, you actually have to go buy a ticket for me to be able to help you'...." (I changed the wording a bit, I can never remember the original, but the punchline and 'thought of the day' is there)

[copacetic]

prayer has proved to have many significant positive effects

It has?

[Garyvdh]

Reading up on medical sights

I think you mean "sites" ... as in web sites?

But yeah, congrats man! Medical technology is amazing!

[buyeye]

Congrats on the pregnancy , maybe warn the friend that you don't want her prayers.

[cerebus]

It also rubs me up the wrong way when others claim their prayers magically helped you when you know how hard you worked for the opportunity. I'm not dismissing the entire idea that it did or did not help, prayer has proved to have many significant positive effects, all I'm saying is put your feet in his shoes and then think of why he posted this. I think the point he tried to make is that she dismissed their effort and the use of drugs ENTIRELY.

"Wow great man, you see I knew it. That doctor doesn't know what she is talking about, trying to give you guys pills and stuff, when all it took was me praying once and it happens. See God answers prayers".

Oh I didn't read that properly....ja ok.

[Geriatrix]

Just brush it off and accept the well wishes, dude.

[VernD]

Similar story

A colleague and I was discussing another colleague who was pregnant. So I asked her when she is going for a second one; her reply: If God permits. I retorted then by saying that it takes her and her husband to make it so why not try and then pray afterwards. But no, she kept her ground saying that it is up to the Lord to allow it. I was like

To the OP, congrats on the pregnancy. Ignore your wife's friend; the worst of deeds are cloaked in the best of intentions.

[blunomore]

People need emotional crutches and religion is one of them. Just let it be.