Bad sex : Worth leaving for?

[Kitten]

Sex is also part of being human, as much as some people try hide it, and shudder at the word, its part of life. I truly believe that if you and your partner can have fantastic sex, you'll be at ease with each other, in good moods etc ... the risk of fighting for no reason goes out the window somewhat.

 

[Alan]

Sheesh! What happened to love, commitment, loyalty, honesty ...

I'm engaged and getting married this year but if my fiancée decided to never have sex with me for the rest of our married lives, I'd still marry her and stay faithful to her.
Why? Because I love her more than my own selfish desires. I love her as a unique, individual person and not as a casual sex object.

No wonder why so many relationships and marriages never work.

That's the society we live in nowadays. Sex triumphs over everything

 

[Slootvreter]

If the sex wasn't up to scratch and she wasn't keen to learn (hope she has an open-minded, hot friend and she can watch for pointers) then she has to go unfortunately...

Agreed. Sex is an important part of a relationship, be it going steady or marriage. Unfortunately women tend to use it as 'reward/punishment', and that's where it goes wrong.

 

[Maelly]

Try to fix it but if its still not improving then bid ADIOS!

 

[Wino]

I think sex in a relationship for men has a far bigger role that women maybe realize. When you start having less and less sex, you can pretend thats its all OK, but you might find yourself getting frustrated and angry over issues that normally wouldnt worry you and this can then lead to arguments etc that now start to eat away at the foundation of the relationship.

You have to talk it over and try and find common ground. When/if this doesnt work then it gets more dangerous IMO. Mind games start up where you can start to question your partners love etc, ....TROUBLE!

 

[Nocturnity]

Agreed. Sex is an important part of a relationship, be it going steady or marriage. Unfortunately women tend to use it as 'reward/punishment', and that's where it goes wrong.

Very true. I blame sitcoms and modern society for this. The cliche has become the norm. I was in a relationship where this happened. Only had sex about once a month (I was 25) and I always felt dirty afterwards because it was like "You were a good boy all month, now here's your treat." Eventually I had it with being someone's lapdog and one-way relationships. I'd rather be single.

I think sex in a relationship for men has a far bigger role that women maybe realize. When you start having less and less sex, you can pretend thats its all OK, but you might find yourself getting frustrated and angry over issues that normally wouldnt worry you and this can then lead to arguments etc that now start to eat away at the foundation of the relationship.

You have to talk it over and try and find common ground. When/if this doesnt work then it gets more dangerous IMO. Mind games start up where you can start to question your partners love etc, ....TROUBLE!

That is also very true! +1

 

[Keeper]

Sheesh! What happened to love, commitment, loyalty, honesty ...

I'm engaged and getting married this year but if my fiancée decided to never have sex with me for the rest of our married lives, I'd still marry her and stay faithful to her.
Why? Because I love her more than my own selfish desires. I love her as a unique, individual person and not as a casual sex object.

No wonder why so many relationships and marriages never work.

i guess that means you believe in the "sex AFTER marriage" thing, cause you clearly dunno what you're talking about - u will go nuts man!

 

[killadoob]

Paul i suggest you buy a fleshlight , they are pretty damn sweet

 

[Keeper]

His penis will pack up his balls and move, lol

 

[Gothan]

If sex plays that much of a part in your relationship, then it would be better to just go to a prostitute and get your money's worth, because relationships are defintely not for you, and defintely not marriage.

Remember, sex is a skill, it can be learned and improved, so it should not be a measurement of a relationship, sex is the culmination of two people, not the foundation

Move up Dr Phil, Dr Gothan is in the house woo woo

 

[Keeper]

Move up Dr Phil, Dr Gothan is in the house woo woo

lol, i wanna see anyone last more than a year - unless you're a monk or something, or your surname is "bundy".

 

[killadoob]

Gothan you think screwing a hooker and having sex with your partner are the same thing?

Yikes dude

 

[brixton tower]

ask for directions

Look sex for me is about 60% of the relationship.

Men don't like to be cuddled or kissed as much as women, we like to have sex and this shows us that our ladies loves us, now ladies want to hugged, kissed, cuddled, told you love them everyday for them thats basically sex.

Now imagine a guy kissed his girl once a week and cuddled her every second week, how long do you think the relationship would last?

Sex is mostly for guys to feel loved
Kissing cuddling etc is the way ladies feel loved.

Obviously there are exceptions to this rule such as one night stands and what not but in a loving a relationship i think that is how it works.

+1

For me bad sex is when a woman is totally unresponsive and won't say what she wants. Guys can do it wrong, that's why its always important to ask(for directions to the honey pot). If you have the view that you know it all, prepare yourself for a lifetime of bad sexual experiences.

 

[Paul_S]

Good luck with that, wait till you get serious "blue balls". We are sexual beings...finish and klaa!

No doubt about that but if bad sex is used as an excuse for cheating on one's wife/gf then something is wrong with one's values.

If the sex is bad it would be far better to speak to the SO and sort the problem out. Any relationship worth it's weight consists of three things : communication, communication and communication. Build the relationship ...

If relationships were just about sex it would be such a breeze to stay married in most cases.

 

[superB]

Yes - if the sex is bad enough then the relationship aint going nowhere. Having said that though, if there is real love involved (the kind that exists outside the lusts and desires of the human body) then surely you work on it? My ex (who I still adore *sigh*) is an awesome lover (a very healthy balance of naughty, dirty sex & sweet, considerate loving *sigh*) but has always been very conscious of the way he kisses (*sigh*). We had a small chat and now I can spend a good few hours of the day dreaming about his new found technique.

(*sigh*)

So as far as I'm concerned, good sex is pretty important, but communication about what you want and how you want it is even more so. Communication can turn bad sex into ok sex. And ok sex (with practice) can become great sex.

Did I mention that I still love my ex?

(*sigh*)

 

[Gothan]

Gothan you think screwing a hooker and having sex with your partner are the same thing?

Yikes dude

No you pervert, read the post, I said, if sex is that important to you that you rate your relationship on it, then rather just go to a prostitute instead of getting into a relationship, because then you get what you pay for

 

[Wino]

If sex plays that much of a part in your relationship, then it would be better to just go to a prostitute and get your money's worth, because relationships are defintely not for you, and defintely not marriage.

Remember, sex is a skill, it can be learned and improved, so it should not be a measurement of a relationship, sex is the culmination of two people, not the foundation

Move up Dr Phil, Dr Gothan is in the house woo woo

I dont think sex with someone you love, and sex with a hooker/mistress can be compared, really.

 

[Keeper]

some twisted values here Gothan... you wouldn't leave sum1 if you didn't get any, but you would pay for aids? weird...

 

[killadoob]

No you pervert, read the post, I said, if sex is that important to you that you rate your relationship on it, then rather just go to a prostitute instead of getting into a relationship, because then you get what you pay for

I'm lost dude, sex with your partner is fun and awesome for both parties or it should be.

Comparing that to a hooker just shows your not getting any and your dating or married to your best bud who you never sleep with

Or your single and pay for prozzies

 

[Gothan]

People people, what I am saying is this, if you feel sex establishes your quality of relationship, then don't bother, never did I say, cheat on someone with prositutes or see prostitutes. Metaphrically!!!!! PLease, stay with the context, if you rate sex so important, that it will ruin your relationship if its not good, then METAPHORICALLY...METAPHORICALLY, all got that word now?? You might just as well pay for sex METAPHORICALLY (again METAPHORICALLY), because that is the basis of your happiness with someone