Corrupt-A-Wish

LaraC

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Mar 11, 2014
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Granted, now go fetch a towel an clean up the mess before it spills onto the floor. :D

I wish backup batteries weren't so expensive.
 

TribbleZA

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Feb 3, 2014
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Granted. To make them less expensive the companies cut costs. As a result the battery only works for 15 minutes -= but it is a really cheap 15 minutes.

I wish I had a great sound system.
 

SykomantiS

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May 7, 2012
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Granted. Aaaaaaand, you're deaf.

I wish Dtribble regular exchanged gifts on Pokemon Go.
 

TribbleZA

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Feb 3, 2014
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Granted lol. She often forgets. Gift on the way. But it is not the gift you were expecting and it crashes your program.

I wish I remembered things better
 

BaronBuffoon

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Sep 7, 2007
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Granted - though you now remember every minute of your life in excruciating l - and I do mean "excruciating" - detail. Unfiltered.

I wish that pi was not irrational.
 

TribbleZA

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Granted - though you now remember every minute of your life in excruciating l - and I do mean "excruciating" - detail. Unfiltered.

I wish that pi was not irrational.
Granted. Pi now starts to make relevant and serious decisions. Pi comes up with a way to save the world. But unfortunately the humans are still irrational and the world dies anyway.
Pi goes into a deep depression and wishes that he had remained irrational
He runs of with an imaginary number and is never seen again

I wish I was a great artist
 

WarriorWolf

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Aug 10, 2019
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Granted. Your artwork is so great that it becomes known througout the entire world. Everybody wants a piece, though naught but 0.0000001% of the entire population of Earth can afford something so exquisite. You enjoy living in a luxurious home with a loving family. You live out your life without having any worries, except for one... You absolutely detest your own art. You think it looks hideous and can't stand the sight of it. You throw up multiple times whenever you paint something. You eventually die, never having understood the human psyche nor why people buy such $h1tty art.

I wish I could know people's true intentions via reading their mind so that I can go straight to the source and not have to listen to the bullcrap they spew out of their mouths.
 
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TribbleZA

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Granted. But you find out that people are a lot more messed up than you originally realised. Not only can you read their true intentions but every thought that flows through every persons mind. You soon discover that there are thoughts that should not be known. And as you are particularly good looking, you have to "hear" what each person will do to you and wants you to do to them. It creeps you out and you decide that living amongst humans is not for you. You move to an island to spend the rest of your days in solitary. But as people had gotten wind of your talent - they seek you out by the millions. You spend the rest of your days on the fun, avoiding people.

I wish that I could morph into an animal.
 

BaronBuffoon

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Sep 7, 2007
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You are a fly. Aren't you relieved that you did not start off as a fly larva?

I wish that I was extraordinarily lucky when it comes to winning competitions.
 

TribbleZA

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Feb 3, 2014
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Granted. You become so lucky that you have to move out where you are as you have way too much stuff now that you have won even competitions you never entered. You have to buy a house to store all your stuff in. It is far from work so now you need to get a taxi every day and you are lonely, have rates to pay and maintenance to upkeep.

I wish I could go overseas for a holiday
 

BaronBuffoon

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If you wish. You didn't specifiy how far overseas you wanted to be, so...

On a visit to Cape Town, somebody convinces you to visit Robben Island. They seem to be more likely to sign up as a client if you agree to go along, so you do. Unfortunately, the barge breaks down just as it reaches the island. It will be four days until anybody notices that the barge has gone missing, and you forgot your smartphone at the hotel you were staying at, so there you are: on a four day "overseas" holiday. It is a good thing that there is plenty of drinking water, fruit, and 16 packs of digestive biscuits on board. [Don't ask me why.]

I wish I made the world's best apple tarts.
 

TribbleZA

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If you wish. You didn't specifiy how far overseas you wanted to be, so...

On a visit to Cape Town, somebody convinces you to visit Robben Island. They seem to be more likely to sign up as a client if you agree to go along, so you do. Unfortunately, the barge breaks down just as it reaches the island. It will be four days until anybody notices that the barge has gone missing, and you forgot your smartphone at the hotel you were staying at, so there you are: on a four day "overseas" holiday. It is a good thing that there is plenty of drinking water, fruit, and 16 packs of digestive biscuits on board. [Don't ask me why.]

I wish I made the world's best apple tarts.
Granted. You become the king of apple tarts. You are well renowned. A mad scientist, in another country, has been experimenting on apple trees. He is successful at giving them sentience and mobility (he was really clever). They trees learn of your apple cooking and tart making and they hunt you down and torture you for weeks. (too disturbing to go into details) You wish you had never ever eaten an apple by the time they are done with you.

I wish I felt better today.
 

BaronBuffoon

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Sep 7, 2007
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You feel good. You feel better than James Brown....

I wish that I was ambidextrous.
 

TribbleZA

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Feb 3, 2014
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Granted. You can do everything equally well with both hands. Problem is - they refuse to work singly and you have to literally do everything with two hands. Writing, brushing teeth, eating. It gets really difficult and messy. You fall into despair, which leads to depression.

I wish someone would make me a snack
 

DiabloDane

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Apr 10, 2019
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1,285
If you wish. You didn't specifiy how far overseas you wanted to be, so...

On a visit to Cape Town, somebody convinces you to visit Robben Island. They seem to be more likely to sign up as a client if you agree to go along, so you do. Unfortunately, the barge breaks down just as it reaches the island. It will be four days until anybody notices that the barge has gone missing, and you forgot your smartphone at the hotel you were staying at, so there you are: on a four day "overseas" holiday. It is a good thing that there is plenty of drinking water, fruit, and 16 packs of digestive biscuits on board. [Don't ask me why.]

I wish I made the world's best apple tarts.
LMFAO!!!
 

LaraC

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Mar 11, 2014
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39,910
Granted. My skills in the kitchen are legendary and you will probably never eat anything ever again. :oops:

I wish that everybody has a Valentine. :)
 

TribbleZA

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Feb 3, 2014
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Granted. But it gets a bit complicated for the married folk as they now get valentines too. And as you know - more than two is a crowd and jealousy flares up because we know that valentines are super romantic. They re-institute sword fighting to see who wins - and as valentines are super amped to win - they do. And so most marriages are dissolved due to the death of partners. The world is in chaos. Happy now ?

I wish my physiotherapist could see me today
 

LaraC

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Mar 11, 2014
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Granted. I'll gift you with a Skype conversation with your therapist. :D

I wish this load shedding nonsense can come to an end.
 

msquared

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Mar 29, 2016
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Granted. But due to the sudden full capacity, the ageing equipment in all the substations blow. A national emergency is declared as there is a shortage of firemen to deal with the countless substation fires.

I wish this was a long weekend.
 

LaraC

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Mar 11, 2014
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39,910
Granted. Due to everyone taking advantage of the long weekend you are now stuck in major gridlock which will only stop at the end of the weekend. ;)

I wish there were more silver linings than dark clouds. :)
 
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