Elon Musk details years at the hands of bullies

[Barbarian Conan]

Bullies hate when you do that, and doing so will just lead to more bullying.

Yup, see my comment about one way to get bullied is to appear to think you are better than them.

 

[Barbarian Conan]

Schools are not a microcosm of adult life, unless if your adult life consists of going to prison. You don't learn anything socially in a school classroom that cannot be obtained elsewhere.

The only socialisation that actually starts mirroring what happens in the real world are interactions during extra-curricular activities like sports or cultural activities.

I don't go to school reunions because I would very likely violate one of my principles about not saying anything if I had to meet the people who tormented me.

Well, I learned to keep my anger in check for one.
I also learned how to interact with people who I don't like, and who possibly doesn't like me.
I learned quite a bit about social interaction at school, and after that in the university "koshuis". It might not be for everyone, but although both had their unpleasant parts, that's how I learned.

 

[Neptuner]

Words are never an excuse for physical violence. Shocking to see people think that this is ok.

It entirely depends on the context, if you open your mouth about something deeply sensitive you partly responsible if someone responds with an impulsive slap.

There are lines you just don’t cross…

 

[Gyre]

At one stage, I was bullied because I had the audacity to talk about the Lego robotics set my parents bought me in grade 4 and how I was programming it to drive around. Got labelled as a science freak. So yeah, no your logic doesn't apply.

As I said, school is an anti-social environment to begin with because everyone is forced to be there. If people are forced to be in a place, they will find something or someone to amuse themselves with. The social dynamics of a school are closer to a prison than a home, which is why the best thing anyone can do is not bring attention to themselves. Leave the attention seeking stuff to places where you can do it, like a specific club where interactions are much more voluntary. Or sports where there is an activity to do.

I enjoyed primary school, high school was a completely different environment and in both changes over the years I hated it. I ironically later in life worked for a couple of schools and got to see more of the behavior I'd grown to hate.

I tried school with my own kids, did things "the right way" and did everything people asked me to do for them, only for them to both be miserable. Since taking them out and homeschooling them, they've been much happier and are thriving. Communication has improved, schedules are more flexible, they do things because they want to and not because a teacher gave them a piece of paper to keep them busy. There is also a lot less drama from teachers and other kids, the friends that my kids have now are people they share genuine interests with, instead of simply being trapped in a room with them all day.

My kids are also very clued up on politics and events around the world, me having not ever brought up the issues at Eskom up with them or mentioned Apartheid, they went about it and did their own research. For other kids and even myself growing up, this would have been a school assignment - for them this was pure curiosity.

When it comes to freedom and doing what is best or your family, it is okay to be different.

 

[konfab]

I enjoyed primary school, high school was a completely different environment and in both changes over the years I hated it. I ironically later in life worked for a couple of schools and got to see more of the behavior I'd grown to hate.

I tried school with my own kids, did things "the right way" and did everything people asked me to do for them, only for them to both be miserable. Since taking them out and homeschooling them, they've been much happier and are thriving. Communication has improved, schedules are more flexible, they do things because they want to and not because a teacher gave them a piece of paper to keep them busy. There is also a lot less drama from teachers and other kids, the friends that my kids have now are people they share genuine interests with, instead of simply being trapped in a room with them all day.

My kids are also very clued up on politics and events around the world, me having not ever brought up the issues at Eskom up with them or mentioned Apartheid, they went about it and did their own research. For other kids and even myself growing up, this would have been a school assignment - for them this was pure curiosity.

When it comes to freedom and doing what is best or your family, it is okay to be different.

BuT ThEy WoN't BE socIAliSed.

 

[_TrXtR_]

Words are never an excuse for physical violence. Shocking to see people think that this is ok.

Sometimes words dont have an excuse either.
You cant just go around saying what you want. Say the right thing and someone would kill you.
This is known, not because everybody are serial killers.
It's because words can be used to manipulate people. And they can manipulate people to become aggresive.
That kinda of manipulation should not be tolerated.
Sometimes the only way to stop it is physical violence.
Often seen where someone says 'watch your mouth' and the person continues to say whatever they want.
The problem here is the guy with the loose mouth, not the guy that retaliates with violence.

 

[Emjay]

Bullying can be verbal.
As Elon Musk indulged in based on accounts from others.

If he kept running his mouth even after being warned it was eventually going to get physical.

Do you also not condone the police using force to stop someone?
Like how far can someone go verbally before you'd think physical force is sufficient to stop them?
Or is the sky the limit?

Can I incite violence and do whatever and nobody can lay finger on me because I'm only running my mouth?

Where did I say you may incite violence with no repercussions?

You really need to stop and think critically for one moment. Allowing children to use physical violence in response to words is bad. Mmmmkay. How does this translate into police not being able to use force to stop a person?

 

[Emjay]

At one stage, I was bullied because I had the audacity to talk about the Lego robotics set my parents bought me in grade 4 and how I was programming it to drive around. Got labelled as a science freak. So yeah, no your logic doesn't apply.

As I said, school is an anti-social environment to begin with because everyone is forced to be there. If people are forced to be in a place, they will find something or someone to amuse themselves with. The social dynamics of a school are closer to a prison than a home, which is why the best thing anyone can do is not bring attention to themselves. Leave the attention seeking stuff to places where you can do it, like a specific club where interactions are much more voluntary. Or sports where there is an activity to do.

You got bullied because you were a nerd? Do you know the nerdy kids are now the popular ones in school? Do you know how strict private schools have become against bullying? Schools are so strict now that children are not even allowed to touch each other. I have raised a young person. The school is what made the difference.

I have been bullied. Severely. Because I was very thin (i.e. something that I had zero control over). I was not hit, but I have stories that will make you cringe. Girls may not be violent, but they are vicious. I however am over it and believe it made me a stronger person because I literally don't give a **** what anyone thinks about me and I am happy to tell people to their faces.

You think there is no bullying in sports? Or work? Think that bullying does not happen as adults? It just becomes more sophisticated.

Truly suggest you go read some Jonathan Haidt. You cannot shelter your child from everything.

 

[Fulcrum29]

Think that bullying does not happen as adults? It just becomes more sophisticated.

I know some real toxic adults, so much that they are venomous, but they are always the victim given the situation. I never quite understood this, particularly those who can't do any wrong or harm, holier than though types.

This is me being annoyed by some people in this world, and every week keeps on giving.

 

[Emjay]

I know some real toxic adults, so much that they are venomous, but they are always the victim given the situation. I never quite understood this, particularly those who can't do any wrong or harm, holier than though types.

This is me being annoyed by some people in this world, and every week keeps on giving.

I think some people are too sheltered as children and grow up into terrible adults because they don't understand why life can be so difficult, and does not always go their way.

I will never forget how I trained with a woman 10 years younger than me (I am a triathlete). We were part of a club. I am not an elite athlete, but we did take our training seriously. So there was some competition between some of the faster people. I however am very aware of my limitations, so I never competed in that sense with my club. However, I learnt that my training partner was competing with me. I stumbled, by accident, into her bad mouthing me with some of the group members. I was very taken aback and that's when I realized she was being a bully. It's still quite amusing to this day. Felt like I was back in high school.

 

[konfab]

You got bullied because you were a nerd? Do you know the nerdy kids are now the popular ones in school? Do you know how strict private schools have become against bullying? Schools are so strict now that children are not even allowed to touch each other. I have raised a young person. The school is what made the difference.

I have been bullied. Severely. Because I was very thin (i.e. something that I had zero control over). I was not hit, but I have stories that will make you cringe. Girls may not be violent, but they are vicious. I however am over it and believe it made me a stronger person because I literally don't give a **** what anyone thinks about me and I am happy to tell people to their faces.

You think there is no bullying in sports? Or work? Think that bullying does not happen as adults? It just becomes more sophisticated.

Truly suggest you go read some Jonathan Haidt. You cannot shelter your child from everything.

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1377991525024604167

Hate to break it to you, but you cannot have a school where there is unsupervised play like what children need, and simultaneously have it free from bullying. They are mutually contradictory concepts. In fact schools are much more likely to coddle (and groom ) your child than parents who homeschool. Take all the gender identity nonsense. If a girl says she is now a boy, the entire school administration will bend head over heels to accommodate them, rather than to just tell them "no".

Being bullied as a child does not make a person stronger. The only thing that makes people stronger is to take on a challenge and overcoming it. You can get all of that without needing to be humiliated and laughed at.

 

[Emjay]

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1377991525024604167

Hate to break it to you, but you cannot have a school where there is unsupervised play like what children need, and simultaneously have it free from bullying. They are mutually contradictory concepts. In fact schools are much more likely to coddle (and groom ) your child than parents who homeschool. Take all the gender identity nonsense. If a girl says she is now a boy, the entire school administration will bend head over heels to accommodate them, rather than to just tell them "no".

Being bullied as a child does not make a person stronger. The only thing that makes people stronger is to take on a challenge and overcoming it. You can get all of that without needing to be humiliated and laughed at.

I did not say I am not against the concept of home schooling. It however is not possible for 99% of people.

Home schooling requires many, many hours from parents to assist the child. I work with people who home school their kids, and they are not the most dedicated, because their children constantly interrupt the parents or require attention. If there is a spouse in the relationship who can dedicate time to it, it's probably the best outcome for a child.

I still think teaching your child to not share opinions in social settings is a very bad idea.

 

[willisau]

That compulsory service was such a waste, think he made the right choice.

It was a waist but the positive is it turn arrogant schoolboys into men

 

[Gyre]

I did not say I am not against the concept of home schooling. It however is not possible for 99% of people.

Home schooling requires many, many hours from parents to assist the child. I work with people who home school their kids, and they are not the most dedicated, because their children constantly interrupt the parents or require attention. If there is a spouse in the relationship who can dedicate time to it, it's probably the best outcome for a child.

I still think teaching your child to not share opinions in social settings is a very bad idea.

I think it greatly depends on the personalities of the kids too, different kids have different needs. My kids manage themselves and do their own thing, if I ask them to do something before I get home in the evening, they do it. If they need help with something, they also first do research on the net first before asking me. I'm lucky to have the kids that I do, but every family is unique.

 

[shearder]

Yes sir!!! We have the terrorists from the 70s and 80s doing about the same as they did then, nothing but FK **** up

 

[Harmonic]

Bullying is a problem and it really only stops when you standup or worse. Look at the US with access to guns, that's worse.

I was bullied as a youngster, only stopped at around 14/15 and that probably the confidence gained because the last bully I took my bike lockup chain to him after his last attempt. Whipped him across his back with it, never again.

From then I'd standup and damn the consequences, most bullies will back down from someone who is going to go full out, they want weak targets.

Similar story. Was constantly bullied by a gent for 2-3 years in upper primary school. It was reported to the school, no resolve. One day, upon the guidance of my guardians, I just stood up and punched the guy as hard as I could with my fist. School said nothing and not a days trouble further with him. It was a really good life lesson.

 

[RedViking]

And the alternative is to let them to emotionally manipulate you and make you upset. So they win either way.

Reasons like this are why I am home-schooling.

Are you going to homeschool all the way through to matric?