Have you chosen to remain single or co-habit? why? why not?

Method

Executive Member
Joined
Aug 11, 2008
Messages
9,497
I don't care about the contract between 2 people, but I still want to get married to mi novio. We've been together for 6 years, been through some tough schit together and have a lot of memories together from our travels etc. I can't think of any reason why not to get married and call him my husband.

Each to their own. Everyone should do what THEY want, not what other people say or believe.
 

adam88

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2011
Messages
295
I prefer my single-hood. I've been single for 5 years and now that I've gone through all the emotions, I find that I'm pretty happy by myself.

- Got money in the bank (investments, etc...)
- Got surplus income streams
- Do what I want, when I want, how I want
- If I want to socialize, I do. When I'm tired of people, I retreat back to my sanctuary
- No (possibly) ungrateful spouse or kids to look after when I get home from work
Been in a long term relationship, and I have all and do all of this. I am a grown man, I do what I want with the other person in mind - out of respect and not because I am forced to do so.

We both have our own investments, both own our own houses in upper-middle-class areas (in Cape Town) without generational wealth, own our cars have no debt other than bonds which do not come close to a third of our salary, so WE as a couple or as individuals do not struggle and do not depend on one another.

I can't deny that there is a possibility of greater happiness when paired, but % seems to be quite small given today's society. Not lottery odds, but more losers than winners it seems. Also:

- I don't want to be divorced raped or have my kids taken away from me
- Don't want to end up supporting a leech of a spouse
- Don't want to end up following someone else's narrative
- Don't want short-term meaningless relationships, but too risky to invest in someone
- Don't want to pickup some venereal disease
- Don't want to end up being someone's provider
- Don't want to continue someone's save game
I do not know which relationships you have been in that makes you think you have to change so much of yourself or worry about everything in your list. Your relationship is what you make of it, if you want to be alone with wealth then that is fine. I would rather be poor than alone to be honest.

I am an ambivert, very extroverted around people I know, I cannot do crowds and I too love my alone time, you need to find someone to love your alone time with you.
 
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r4nd0m

Well-Known Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2016
Messages
114
Been in a long term relationship, and I have all and do all of this. I am a grown man, I do what I want with the other person in mind - out of respect and not because I am forced to do so.

We both have our own investments, both own our own houses in upper-middle-class areas (in Cape Town) without generational wealth, own our cars have no debt other than bonds which do not come close to a third of our salary, so WE as a couple or as individuals do not struggle and do not depend on one another.

I do not know which relationships you have been in that makes you think you have to change so much of yourself or worry about everything in your list. Your relationship is what you make of it, if you want to be alone with wealth then that is fine. I would rather be poor than alone to be honest.

I am an ambivert, very extroverted around people I know, I cannot do crowds and I too love my alone time, you need to find someone to love your alone time with you.
Good for you man.
 

The Voice

Executive Member
Joined
Jan 25, 2009
Messages
8,737
Was with my far better half for 14 years before we finally tied the knot. Guess you could say we knew for sure it was going to work out by then. ;)
 
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