Joe Biden defeats Trump to win US election

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Brontosaurus

Brontosaurus

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daelm said:
Can the First South African Antifa Esports Platoon and Bookclub please assemble...

@greg0205 @ForceFate @surface @OrbitalDawn @The Trutherizer @AlmightyBender @buka001 @tetrasect @AfricanTech @RedViking @Tofu @scudsucker @theratman @C4Cat @cerebus @TEXTILE GUY @daveza @RanzB @Unhappy438 @SlinkyMike @EADC @Cray @copacetic @Aquila ka Hecate


gentlemen, ladies, and persons of no acknowledged gender. thank you for coming.

I want you to know that the Forces of Luxury Fully Automated Gay Space Communism are proud of you this day. i am proud of you this day. together, we have come through the meme wars of 20/21 with great honour and numerous victories. we stand, today, on the brink of something majestic: the bloated and gently decaying metaphorical corpse of Donald John Trump. and, while I know that every one of you neither seeks nor needs a reward and that you, as I, do this for the love of communism and the desire to see chaos reign, in this moment of respite I draw your attention to the reward you have, and the reward you deserve.

tonight, while you hug your husbands, wives, and non-binary partners, while you possibly make love or at least digitally manipulate each other, Donald John Trump will be eating cold KFC in an empty room in Florida. he will finish the whole bucket, licking his fingers all the while. and as the potentially-chicken carcasses begin their slow, tortured migration through his long, dark colon, pressure will start to build in his tired body, a pressure that will force him to rise, and to trundle slowly and laboriously to the Mar-a-Lago toilet.

there he will evacuate comprehensively, a rank and odorous deposit that has astonished many a medical professional, and finally, feeling the only relief that he has ever known, he will reach for his phone to while away the time until it is safe for him to stand up. reflexively, he will open the app called, by some, "Twitter". and at precisely that moment the memories will come rushing back, flooding his body with a sensation he can only experience, but never identify: shame. his great, shaggy head will bow, and a single, lonely tear will course its way down his face through the makeup and jowl. it will come to rest on his cheek, a single, beautiful diamond in a world of darkness. perishable. fragile. impermanent as life. in your mind's eye, i invite each of you to lick that tear.

this is your reward. this and this alone.

i know that each of you is tired. we have fought them on the gifs, we have fought them on the memes, we have fought them with many arcane South Park and Archer references. it has been a bloody, dirty, brutal war of attrition. i tell you: rest now. take a loved one of your preference and preferred gender and pronoun and make sweet sexual intercourse in the position of your choice, always remembering the appropriate level of foreplay and acquiring consent as you proceed. revel in the sunrise tomorrow, treasuring it as the future replacement for fossil fuels. smile at the first person you see and decline to call them by archaic gender signifiers.

and then, gentlemen gentlepersons, then, having rested, WE MUST RISE AGAIN! there will be more wars. there will always be nazis in the shadows. the Democrats, our unlikely allies in this endeavour, may soon forget their promise, and revert to corporate spending, abandoning healthcare for all. our challenges and difficulties are never-ending. but rise to them, we must, lest we lose our freedoms. also, never forget that DavidFreeman is still out there.

i salute you. i honour you. and i love you.

all together now... HAIL SATAN!

thank you. as you were.
Click to expand...

Why wasn't I mentioned?

*hashtag sadface*
 
Readsalot

Readsalot

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Perfect.


5b1b675bd076de262a5785dc506867bc.jpg
 
R

rambo919

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So now that the circus is over..... who are you crazy lefties gonna poop on next? Your favourite strange sex toy is gone.....
 
Dslartibarfast

Dslartibarfast

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CaptainOblivious said:
https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1351975650521993221
:sneaky:
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It's amazing how self centred Americans are. So the entire world, including countries that absolutely despise each other, all decided to get together and fake a pandemic to get the orange man out of office? Not only that, but wreck their own economies to almost the point of collapse just so that America could have a different election result? China was in on it, Iran, Israel etc. Can't get these guys to agree on anything but suddenly they could come together for the orange man?
 
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