Erm you have a tale to finish!!!!!!!
Awwww richt!
Part 1 (As mentioned above)
True story, about 5 years back, I organised about 6kg of pork ribs..... invited a klomp people over one Sunday, had the ribs marinating since the friday, was gonna braai the lot...... I got dronk before I started braaing as I did the normal thing of just piling more and more wood onto the fire, knocking back the ales..... after four hours HO gave me the look, you know the one where she is telling you, "Listen up dick! you better start cooking otherwise you gonna be paying for it for next month...." So in front of my 10 guests, including the English in laws, I get's up, stagger over to the coals, downed a 440ml and dumped the entire 6kg of ribs onto the fire....
Do you know what happened? for the first time in 25 years of braaing, it happened, the entire fire went from flaming hot, to snuffed out dead in 2 minutes..... seriously, never seen this in my life before, WTF? I stood there, my back turned to my seated guests, staring at the cold fire, cracking open another tin, as I wondered to myself, "What the feck just happend to the fire? How the hell did that happen? what do I tell my guests? More so what will HO do to me tonight?", I could feel the can of beer in my hand tremble.... maybe I could sneak all this meat into the michaelwave (yes! we have a pet name for our microwave) cook it without them all knowing ..... it was around this time, that the English Father in law teleported next to my side, gloating , that his son in law, the one not worthy of marrying his only daughter, HO, the Scotsman who drinks to much had just screwed up..... , loudly he exclaims, "You silly Scotsman ! What have you done to the fire?" ..... like HO he does not swear or speak English like I do....
Part 2 (The sequel, presented in drunken 5.1 surround sound in certain breweries)
The English Father in Law, when he exclaimed those words, they were not directed at his inebriated Scottish son in law, but rather at the ten or so seated guests behind my back.... Indeed a point to prove, Somewhere in my drunken skull, a movie flashed back, words echoing, " We're not worthy, we're not worthy........" .... Bastard....
I skulked away from the man fire, as the other men from the tribe joined the ecstatic father in law, all pondering, much wailing and gnashing of teeth could be heard from the starving men...... They pondered, they all went ,"tsk!tsk!" , I glan ed over to HO, my vision comprimised with the compliments of the Namibian Breweries.... Her head hung low, shoulders drooped.......
/ Sorry Gotta move the sprayer...
Sign up with Google