My daughter's boss is forcing her to take anti-depressants

[Looney]

Kind of what I meant. If you're going to ask your GP for antidepressants because "nobody likes me" or "the love of my life left me and I want to kill myself", he should know you need therapy and not meds.

True, I suppose it can be either or. If the doc thinks you are a threat to yourself or others then he can refer you to a psychiatrist to give you therapy and determine if you need medication.

 

[RiaX]

psychiatrist = Medical doctor thats a specialist in mental conditions

psycologist = therapist

 

[Celine]

Not a chance. She will tell me to get knotted.

this is exactly where it all started to begin with. you should have put your child in her place from the time she was a in diapers. she has taken this very attitude to the work place and demonstrated exactly this towards a more senior person. this has been identified by the person in a managerial position and dealt with in an appropriate manner.

i am not condoning the fact that the manager is forcing her to take medication, that is definitely wrong and as a parent myself i would have been on the phone myself to the manager and read the riot act to him/her.

i have noticed this with today's youth. they start work and from day one they know more than a person who is in a senior position to them. this may well be the case here.

 

[Rouxenator]

In most cases it is for the better, especially for women. On the long term you are better off on mood stabalizers if you are bipolar.

 

[Alan]

True, I suppose it can be either or. If the doc thinks you are a threat to yourself or others then he can refer you to a psychiatrist to give you therapy and determine if you need medication.

If the shrink thinks you are a threat to yourself they'll have you commited.

 

[Sherbang]

this is exactly where it all started to begin with. you should have put your child in her place from the time she was a in diapers. she has taken this very attitude to the work place and demonstrated exactly this towards a more senior person. this has been identified by the person in a managerial position and dealt with in an appropriate manner.

i am not condoning the fact that the manager is forcing her to take medication, that is definitely wrong and as a parent myself i would have been on the phone myself to the manager and read the riot act to him/her.

i have noticed this with today's youth. they start work and from day one they know more than a person who is in a senior position to them. this may well be the case here.

Really? So do you do everything your mother tells you to do?

 

[rubytox]

this is exactly where it all started to begin with. you should have put your child in her place from the time she was a in diapers. she has taken this very attitude to the work place and demonstrated exactly this towards a more senior person. this has been identified by the person in a managerial position and dealt with in an appropriate manner.

i am not condoning the fact that the manager is forcing her to take medication, that is definitely wrong and as a parent myself i would have been on the phone myself to the manager and read the riot act to him/her.

i have noticed this with today's youth. they start work and from day one they know more than a person who is in a senior position to them. this may well be the case here.

Really? And the boss would of course comply with your prescription on how to deal with my CHILD.

P.S. she's not in a creche or high school. She's an adult.

 

[Sherbang]

Really? And the boss would of course comply with your prescription on how to deal with my CHILD.

P.S. she's not in a creche or high school. She's an adult.

It really annoys me when people blame parents for the choices people make as adults. Adults are responsible for their own choices and are living their own lives and adults sometimes do stupid things and make mistakes irrespective of how they were brought up. Any parent knows that their children have their own personality and will from a early age. You can't take responsibility for your child their whole life. As an adult it's her life, her life is her responsibility and her choices are hers to make.

 

[RiaX]

It really annoys me when people blame parents for the choices people make as adults. Adults are responsible for their own choices and are living their own lives and adults sometimes do stupid things and make mistakes irrespective of how they were brought up. Any parent knows that their children have their own personality and will from a early age. You can't take responsibility for your child their whole life. As an adult it's her life, her life is her responsibility and her choices are hers to make.

An adult is trained not born. So childhood upbringing is a significant factor on the person a child becomes. If an adult has no respect for a hierarchy then where does that come from ? poor parenting

 

[rubytox]

An adult is trained not born. So childhood upbringing is a significant factor on the person a child becomes. If an adult has no respect for a hierarchy then where does that come from ? poor parenting

Please provide some guidelines or advise on how to undo the past. I'm all ears ....

 

[RiaX]

Please provide some guidelines or advise on how to undo the past. I'm all ears ....

too late damage was done. Like a untrained puppy. However people are different than dogs perhaps you should sit your daughter down and talk to her seriously ?

 

[AfricanTech]

An adult is trained not born. So childhood upbringing is a significant factor on the person a child becomes. If an adult has no respect for a hierarchy then where does that come from ? poor parenting

Such naïveté can only come from people who don't have adult offspring.

Adults make their own minds - that's why they're called adults.

 

[rubytox]

too late damage was done. Like a untrained puppy. However people are different than dogs perhaps you should sit your daughter down and talk to her seriously ?

Any pointers on how to talk to her seriously? I don't know what that means.

 

[RiaX]

Such naïveté can only come from people who don't have adult offspring.

Adults make their own minds - that's why they're called adults.

Are you sure ? so you have NO HABBITS from your childhood ? I bet you think because you an adult you can change your handwriting as well ? or what you see everyday is actually what you see and not complied from a memory bank by the brain ?

no sir you are naive. They are adults they can make decissions yes but their thought processes are defined in childhood and refined through life experiences. It will be apparent in your everyday actions. Adults are trained its like that for all mammals people are no exception

 

[akescpt]

I think its a bit kark that this is now all a result of bad parenting. amazing the conclusion that gets formulated from a minute snapshot of someone's life.

 

[rubytox]

Are you sure ? so you have NO HABBITS from your childhood ? I bet you think because you an adult you can change your handwriting as well ? or what you see everyday is actually what you see and not complied from a memory bank by the brain ?

no sir you are naive. They are adults they can make decissions yes but their thought processes are defined in childhood and refined through life experiences. It will be apparent in your everyday actions. Adults are trained its like that for all mammals people are no exception

Do you mean HOBBITS?

 

[RiaX]

Any pointers on how to talk to her seriously? I don't know what that means.

What im saying is get the full story. From the origin. You need to explain to her about politics and issues that will come in work and how to deal with it. When to ignore issues when walk away when to fight when to be the bigger person.

You a parent and you dont know what that means ? do you not know how to support your child or how to discipline your kid when they in the wrong ? or how to get a truthful story out of your kid ?

Sir this is your daughter I cant exactly say HOW to do these things because I dont know her but I can give you advice on WHAT to do. You telling me this story adds up ? obviously she omitting alot of detail

 

[rubytox]

I think its a bit kark that this is now all a result of bad parenting. amazing the conclusion that gets formulated from a minute snapshot of someone's life.

Any parent of adult children will take such criticism with a pinch of salt. If they don't then they should.
Most parents do the best they can and while we may strive for perfection, the caregiver of a child will inevitably influence the child in positive and negative ways.
Besides, as Riax admitted, we are shaped through our experiences. The shaping of a personality is an ongoing process. Trauma at any stage of a person's life, for example, can have a permanent effect on that person.

Hind sight is a pure science and should have's do not count.

 

[AfricanTech]

Are you sure ? so you have NO HABBITS from your childhood ? I bet you think because you an adult you can change your handwriting as well ? or what you see everyday is actually what you see and not complied from a memory bank by the brain ?

no sir you are naive. They are adults they can make decissions yes but their thought processes are defined in childhood and refined through life experiences. It will be apparent in your everyday actions. Adults are trained its like that for all mammals people are no exception

Oh dear - a 'pure' scientist - if you can't paint it blue and roll it down the corridor it doesn't exist.

These purely behaviorist arguments were debunked more than 20 years ago.

Human behavior and personality is a combination of nature+nurture+ongoing experience.

Of course there are things that are habits from childhood reinforced through experience - there are many more things that I was taught to do / behave as a child that I simply don't do anymore because along the way life experience, reading, workshops, coaching, mentoring (self and others) and introspection taught me new ones.

If you don't have adult offspring of your own, then you are not qualified to comment on this aspect of this now derailed thread. You just don't have the experience.

You are of course perfectly entitled to your opinion, but that will hold very little weight.

 

[RiaX]

I think its a bit kark that this is now all a result of bad parenting. amazing the conclusion that gets formulated from a minute snapshot of someone's life.

No dont get me wrong im not saying ruby is a bad parent all im saying is that i agree with celine that what parents do in childhood will resonate through adulthood. Fortunately humans are never to old to learn so it cant be sorted out with serious talk.

In my books if you as a parent provide food, clothes, education and your child ends up with a job and not breaking the law as a young adult then you a sucessful parent and nobody can take that away from you. Its ludicrous to think that a parent knows everything and is suppose to train a perfect child - that will never happen. Though the point is that if you missed that something in your parenting its your responsibility to put it.