What if I'm okay making someone pregnant?

medicnick83

medicnick83

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Aug 23, 2006
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21,005
I wouldn't mind having a kid... I have alot to teach him... especially how to AVOID the TK! :)
 
blunomore

blunomore

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Acid, becoming a father is irreversible and forever. It takes a while to grasp the full implications of that concept ... are you sure??
 
A

adelp

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May 6, 2008
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Take R1500 a month burn or flush it smear all your stuff with snot and spit, then get deodarant smelling of poo...... it's still beter than having kids.
 
C

chiskop

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I think that discussing it with the mother-to-be might also be advisable. :rolleyes:
 
W

Waaib

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Acid - what is she does fall preggo's. You want it but she doesn't. What then?
 
T

thriel

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Acid, there is no shame in having a small winkie, i'm sure the guys here wont hold it against you :p
 
N

Nocturnity

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adelp said:
Take R1500 a month burn or flush it smear all your stuff with snot and spit, then get deodarant smelling of poo...... it's still beter than having kids.
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Sense +1. :D

I'm currently commitment phobic. I enjoy my freedom too much. I was at a friend's place yesterday before we went out on the bikes and there was some baby show thing on TV. His wife mentioned something about their future offspring and I know they've been trying for a while. That got me thinking... We have awesome parties at their place that carry on until 5/6/7 the next morning. Everyone gets hammered and it's generally pretty rowdy. He plays guitar in a death metal band and there's generally a lot of noise involved. All that has to change when you have kids. I'm definitely not ready for that...
 
supersunbird

supersunbird

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Mmmmm, so should I be happy that I'm single and childless? I wonder if men got a biological clock...
 
S

skoob

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Are You Ready for Children?

Mess Test: Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flowerbed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

Toy Test: Obtain a 55-gallon box of Lego's. (If Lego's are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream. (This could wake a child at night.)

Grocery Store Test: Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.

Dressing Test: Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.

Feeding Test: Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.

Night Test: Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8 - 12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8:00 PM begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00 PM. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00 PM. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00 AM. Set alarm for 5:00 AM. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.

Physical Test (Women): Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans.

Physical Test (Men): Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.

Final Assignment: Find a couple who already has a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run riot. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.
 
blunomore

blunomore

Honorary Master
Joined
Jul 8, 2007
Messages
26,789
skoob said:
Are You Ready for Children?

Mess Test: Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flowerbed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

Toy Test: Obtain a 55-gallon box of Lego's. (If Lego's are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream. (This could wake a child at night.)

Grocery Store Test: Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.

Dressing Test: Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.

Feeding Test: Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.

Night Test: Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8 - 12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8:00 PM begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00 PM. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00 PM. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00 AM. Set alarm for 5:00 AM. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.

Physical Test (Women): Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans.

Physical Test (Men): Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.

Final Assignment: Find a couple who already has a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run riot. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.
Click to expand...


Hysterical!! Thanks for the wake-up call.
 
G

guest2013-1

guest
Joined
Aug 22, 2003
Messages
19,800
blunomore said:
Acid, becoming a father is irreversible and forever. It takes a while to grasp the full implications of that concept ... are you sure??
Click to expand...

I know. I'm kind of at that stage where I'd want a permanent commitment like that. Even if it's out of wedlock i guess.

Waaib said:
Acid - what is she does fall preggo's. You want it but she doesn't. What then?
Click to expand...

I'll respect any decision she makes. It's her body afterall and I don't really have a say in the matter other than I'll be the dad.

thriel said:
Acid, there is no shame in having a small winkie, i'm sure the guys here wont hold it against you :p
Click to expand...

Guys with smaller penisses are proven to try harder which usually makes them better lovers than the walking tri-pod's out there. Penis size really is only a big deal if you and... lets say.... a horse makes a bet of R100 who has the biggest wiener and that R100 will pay for a much needed penis reduction of yours otherwise you'll die or something...
 
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