What was your worst consensual sexual experience?

[Ancalagon]

Don't even want to. IT was consensual. She was around 55. Hooked up at a pub I think. She was like the "pub mum" you know, covered in tattoos and sounded like a man from years second hand smoke from the pool hall. I'll just leave it at that. Was a long time ago while living in Oxford.

feelsverybadman.

Did you hug yourself in the shower and cry afterwards?

 

[Fulcrum29]

You have the key to your own dilemma. You state you are picky. If I may ask, are you open to your potential long term partner having kids, or not?

Women, on average, want to be in a committed relationship, and more often than not, are happier with sex within the confines of long term relationship/marriage as affection is more important for women (on average). The feminist agenda is definitely moving away from the tradition of getting married and having kids, but it does not talk to what most women want. Surprisingly, women who are married for a long time and have children are happier than sexually liberated / independent women (but, that's a discussion for another day). Outright stating that marriage is off the table may drive some away, especially if such a woman does not have children. You may be sabotaging your efforts here.

If you have a reputation of sleeping around, women will most likely avoid you if they are looking for something long term, but those that do gravitate towards adultery and multiple sexual partners will approach you more often. I would definitely look to spend time with those that are more discreet (which I admit is probably a lot harder than it sounds).

Personally, I believe having one kid is enough, but life and ideas change, especially when you share experiences with a partner (or life partner). No, I'm not a man whore, I am definitely not in the habit of having multiple sexual encounters by random chance. Currently, I have placed myself back on the backburner due to recent events, like I said, it is morally challenging for me.

For now, the idea of marriage is off the table, it is because of me having a marriage which should never have been a marriage in the first place. We married due to pregnancy at a young 'inexperienced' age. Being divorced today, I and my ex are in a much better place. 'Our' son is getting along great under the circumstances. Who knows, maybe I will marry again someday... for the better.

Thank you for your insightful reply.

 

[Slootvreter]

Maybe you should get to know the lady a little before you sleep with her?

No.

 

[Emjay]

Personally, I believe having one kid is enough, but life and ideas change, especially when you share experiences with a partner (or life partner). No, I'm not a man whore, I am definitely not in the habit of having multiple sexual encounters by random chance. Currently, I have placed myself back on the backburner due to recent events, like I said, it is morally challenging for me.

For now, the idea of marriage is off the table, it is because of me having a marriage which should never have been a marriage in the first place. We married due to pregnancy at a young 'inexperienced' age. Being divorced today, I and my ex are in a much better place. 'Our' son is getting along great under the circumstances. Who knows, maybe I will marry again someday... for the better.

Thank you for your insightful reply.

I have a very unhealthy addiction in trying to understand what drives female sexuality. Love hearing about other people's experiences. No judgement from me at all. I actually think modern Western society is far harder on men, than women.

Do you meet these ladies on dating apps? I am sure it's like being punched in the stomach after finding out that she is married/engaged. Pretty despicable.

 

[Emjay]

Don't even want to. IT was consensual. She was around 55. Hooked up at a pub I think. She was like the "pub mum" you know, covered in tattoos and sounded like a man from years second hand smoke from the pool hall. I'll just leave it at that. Was a long time ago while living in Oxford.

feelsverybadman.

You painted a very clear picture. I can almost taste the stale cigarette smoke.

 

[Ghoster79]

Did you hug yourself in the shower and cry afterwards?

I'm already starting to feel a bit dirty and queezy and we haven't even heard details yet

 

[Slootvreter]

You painted a very clear picture. I can almost taste the stale cigarette smoke.

 

[Solarion]

Did you hug yourself in the shower and cry afterwards?

A little yes. Like when you look in the mirror and wonder WTF?

You painted a very clear picture. I can almost taste the stale cigarette smoke.

I'm already starting to feel a bit dirty and queezy and we haven't even heard details yet

It was all just generally a not good experience. Something to possibly not ever tell my kids about one day

 

[Slootvreter]

I am sure it's like being punched in the stomach after finding out that she is married/engaged. Pretty despicable.

Unless you fell in love, who cares?

 

[Emjay]

It was all just generally a not good experience

Haha.

I am sure she had the time of her life though.

 

[Emjay]

Unless you fell in love, who cares?

I am sure you would be ok if your wife/G/F cheated on you, but a lot of women don't see it that way. And, clearly, men also have a moral line which they are not willing to cross. Also, sex is not just sex for most women. Women need more than just a little physical attraction to get their rocks off. There has to be a mental connection to some point too.

 

[Solarion]

Haha.

I am sure she had the time of her life though.

Oh I'm sure I was just 1 tiny timeofherlife event in a whole lifetime of timeofherlives

 

[Slootvreter]

I am sure you would be ok if your wife/G/F cheated on you, but a lot of women don't see it that way. And, clearly, men also have a moral line which they are not willing to cross. Also, sex is not just sex for most women. Women need more than just a little physical attraction to get their rocks off. There has to be a mental connection to some point too.

Why are you sure I would be ok with that?

If you found a girl on a dating site or wherever, and you hook up for casual sex, and you find afterwards she is not single, boohoo, tough luck. Just another notch on the bedpost. Move on.

 

[Emjay]

Why are you sure I would be ok with that?

If you found a girl on a dating site or wherever, and you hook up for casual sex, and you find afterwards she is not single, boohoo, tough luck. Just another notch on the bedpost. Move on.

It's not bad behaviour for you, as you are not a willing participant, but it is bad behaviour on her part if she is not telling the truth. I don't have anything against people having casual sex.

 

[Nick333]

Not really. There is a physical reason why receptive anal sex for men (straight or gay) is awesome (if done right).

For woman, I am not sure what enjoyment there would be for her, but I have heard some ladies do find it pleasurable.

I know you wouldn't be an expert, but the two tunnels are right next door with not much in between so the stimulation is pretty much the same. From what I understand, those who enjoy it enjoy it because it feels like having a bigger dick in them, plus doing something sexy for their man, plus the feeling of doing something a bit naughty and extreme - I mean as reasons for doing it when there's a more suitable and easier option.

 

[Ockie]

I know you wouldn't be an expert, but the two tunnels are right next door with not much in between so the stimulation is pretty much the same. From what I understand, those who enjoy it enjoy it because it feels like having a bigger dick in them, plus doing something sexy for their man, plus the feeling of doing something a bit naughty and extreme - I mean as reasons for doing it when there's a more suitable and easier option.

Makes sense ... dankie meneer for the explanation.

 

[Emjay]

Oh I'm sure I was just 1 tiny timeofherlife event in a whole lifetime of timeofherlives

Maybe. Maybe not. I mean, she could still think about her time with Solarion, in his exuberant youth, and wistfully wish he was still around...

 

[Slootvreter]

It's not bad behaviour for you, as you are not a willing participant, but it is bad behaviour on her part if she is not telling the truth. I don't have anything against people having casual sex.

Yes, indeed bad behaviour on her side, but it's not as if I'll be devastated or gutted. Anyway, I think we are more or less agreeing here

 

[Ghoster79]

I know you wouldn't be an expert, but the two tunnels are right next door with not much in between so the stimulation is pretty much the same. From what I understand, those who enjoy it enjoy it because it feels like having a bigger dick in them, plus doing something sexy for their man, plus the feeling of doing something a bit naughty and extreme - I mean as reasons for doing it when there's a more suitable and easier option.

IIRC it also has a lot to do with the fact that there almost as many nerves in the area as there are in the vag, so giving them pleasurable feelings..... feels good. Seeing as physically, men and woman should be pretty much identical in that region, I can see how it would feel good for men (gay or straight) as well, especially when adding in the scenario of prostate stimulation - I can't say though, that "pegging" has ever appealed to me.

 

[Emjay]

IIRC it also has a lot to do with the fact that there almost as many nerves in the area as there are in the vag, so giving them pleasurable feelings..... feels good. Seeing as physically, men and woman should be pretty much identical in that region, I can see how it would feel good for men (gay or straight) as well, especially when adding in the scenario of prostate stimulation - I can't say though, that "pegging" has ever appealed to me.

Pegging is not the only way. Some men like to be stimulated in that area while having sex as well. You don't need full penetration to experience the benefits.