What you earn belongs to the family what she earns belongs to her

[Polymathic]

This is something I noticed in the Durban Indian community a lot. Where the husband's salary is used towards the general house expenses and husband usually has to ask his wife for permission before he can use his money that he earned himself while the wife pretty much uses her salary any which way she pleases.
Has an Indian male (unmarried) myself I really don't understand it

 

[joeyhza]

So - go against the grain and change it.

Thats what i'd do.

 

[Pho3nix]

Isn't that most marriages?
EDIT : I'm aware I'm generalizing but I've seen this happen.

 

[Ancalagon]

Whats yours is hers and whats hers is hers.

 

[The_Unbeliever]

Whats yours is hers and whats hers is hers.

Yeah

 

[Hamish McPanji]

Yeah, i don't understand it either. Cultural thing i guess.

Of all people, my mum told my wife when i got married "Everything he earns , belongs to you. Everything you earn belongs to you" . I thought she would be on my side!!!

My wife is pretty cool though, she isnt really too bothered about it all and lets me handle the financials. Only on the odd very rare occasion do i have to tell her to take it easy for a few days as we are running low.

 

[xrapidx]

I'm not Indian...

but my salary generally goes towards everything required for the house/life - except I don't ask permission to use it. (most of the times, neither does she)

her salary goes towards what ever - although she does occasionally spend it on house stuff.

 

[Bizkit87]

There is a word for this. *****whipped.

 

[Cicero]

Ag I think thats generally the case when the male in the relationship earns more, regardless of race or culture. A happy wife and all that...

 

[Hamish McPanji]

There is a word for this. *****whipped.

Don't knock it. My brother used to laugh at me until he got married.
Then he ended up being more whipped than me.....i remind him often

 

[supersunbird]

There is a word for this. *****whipped.

Guess that's why Im still single...

 

[smallearth]

My wife and I both check with each other if we want to have any out of budget expenditure, such as cellphones, handbags, laptops, games, etc...

All our earnings are considered household funds...

 

[Batista]

There is a word for this. *****whipped.

Yup, you'll need to man the f up and wear the pants in the relationship!
But seriously if you are buying ps3 games and crap when you child needs new shoes/clothing then your wife should step in.My fiance never buys clothing/shoes or anything above R200 without asking me first.Im so lucky!I really feel for those guys that dont get to spend their hard earned money like the OP described.

 

[Anonymous™]

This is something I noticed in the Durban Indian community a lot. Where the husband's salary is used towards the general house expenses and husband usually has to ask his wife for permission before he can use his money that he earned himself while the wife pretty much uses her salary any which way she pleases.
Has an Indian male (unmarried) myself I really don't understand it

Women are natural born hustlers man. I've seen this across the spectrum. I won't shoot it down because I kinda have an idea of how I'll one day make financials work.

Combine our income, use 60% on life & all things related and 20% each as the "no questions personal fund". It has its flaws but I reckon it'd be sensible.

There is a word for this. *****whipped.

 

[blunomore]

In a lot of households, the woman is the "financial manager", hence their arrangement as indicated in the OP.

 

[GreyBush]

I'm not Indian...

but my salary generally goes towards everything required for the house/life - except I don't ask permission to use it. (most of the times, neither does she)

her salary goes towards what ever - although she does occasionally spend it on house stuff.

Same and I'm also not indian. I use my salary for the monthly expenses so I have to watch my budget and make sure we aren't going to run out by the end of the month, her salary is for all the extra things, clothes, house stuff and holidays. She doesn't spend her money selfishly though.

I do earn a substantially larger salary though so I do have left over money... and I can do whatever I want with it.

 

[Totempole]

This is something I noticed in the Durban Indian community a lot. Where the husband's salary is used towards the general house expenses and husband usually has to ask his wife for permission before he can use his money that he earned himself while the wife pretty much uses her salary any which way she pleases.
Has an Indian male (unmarried) myself I really don't understand it

If it had worked like that in my household things would have been a lot better for all of us. Instead of my father blowing money on useless crap which ultimately became worthless, he would have been able to comfortably retire by now.

 

[F1 Fan]

Well, Im indian an we are different. We don't look at what I earn vs what she earns, we look at our earnings together as our income. And we spend accordingly. I feel this is best, even though I earn more, it makes no real difference to me. My wife is still my responsibility, and bickering about money is not on the agenda.

 

[Ms_S]

My husband and I contribute equally towards the household expenditure.

He pays rent, I pay the car.
He pays for the big grocery shopping trip. I buy the small weekly grocery things.
He pays for the electricity and petrol for the car. I buy all the baby's things like nappies, toiletries and clothes.
We both buy gadgets or perfumes or little luxuries without consulting one another.

 

[gregmcc]

My wife and I both check with each other if we want to have any out of budget expenditure, such as cellphones, handbags, laptops, games, etc..

You should stop buying yourself handbags