Woman Abuse

Tux

Tux

Software Communist
Joined
Aug 3, 2005
Messages
13,506
Without going into too much detail, a lady friend of mine is in an very abusive relationship.

Me and my missus are trying to get her to go to some shelter for abused women as she has virtually no means to support herself at the moment. She's finally agreed to this if we can get her into a good place where she will be safe from her abuser.

I need help though, getting her into a good place where she will be secure and looked after. Googling gives me an overload of info and I do not know which one to choose. My experience in this is just about non-existent.

I would appreciate pointers to a good place for her in the PTA/JHB area.
 
Kornhub

Kornhub

Blackburn Fan
Joined
Oct 15, 2008
Messages
34,554
What Paul said. I will look in my books at home for you when I can.
 
C

Celine

Executive Member
Joined
Aug 25, 2008
Messages
5,711
there are many "good" places that will help abused women and children. what exactly does she mean by "good"? if she wants out of this relationship then she will go to the first place that is available to get her away from her abuser. wanting a "good" place is an excuse for her to stay right where she's at.
 
T

The_Unbeliever

Honorary Master
Joined
Apr 19, 2005
Messages
103,196
Good luck. You're doing the right thing by helping her.

Honestly, I don't get it what people gain by abusing their spouses/family, esp children! :sick: :crying:
 
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STS

STS

Mafia Detective
Joined
Jan 4, 2009
Messages
32,798
Celine said:
there are many "good" places that will help abused women and children. what exactly does she mean by "good"? if she wants out of this relationship then she will go to the first place that is available to get her away from her abuser. wanting a "good" place is an excuse for her to stay right where she's at.
Click to expand...

Sometimes you have some good things with some bad. She might have lots of luxuries, a big house, wonderful friends, but a husband that comes home every night and hits her. she can lose the husband but then she loses all the other things too. some women may stay thinking they can change the man or because of loyalty, others simply have nothing else
 
RazedInBlack

RazedInBlack

RazedInBlack
Joined
Sep 4, 2008
Messages
37,362
Tux said:
Without going into too much detail, a lady friend of mine is in an very abusive relationship.

Me and my missus are trying to get her to go to some shelter for abused women as she has virtually no means to support herself at the moment. She's finally agreed to this if we can get her into a good place where she will be safe from her abuser.

I need help though, getting her into a good place where she will be secure and looked after. Googling gives me an overload of info and I do not know which one to choose. My experience in this is just about non-existent.

I would appreciate pointers to a good place for her in the PTA/JHB area.
Click to expand...

She has no parents, close relatives, family that can assist?
 
Aghori

Aghori

Honorary Master
Joined
May 11, 2009
Messages
14,245
It would be best for her to turn to family first for help. Swallow the pride and ask for help as family comes first.
 
ice_cubes

ice_cubes

Executive Member
Joined
Mar 24, 2011
Messages
5,170
There are some situations where one would never want their families and friends to see them in...abuse is one of them, financial woes comes 2nd.

Reason is because IF you happen to go back to the abuser, they will always be judgemental and remind you how stupid you are to go back to him, how weak you are etc.The treatment and respect they had for you all goes down the drain. Family is for life, and no-one wants that stigma being stuck with them for the rest of their lives.

Typical example is of a marriage where the husband has a child out-of-wedlock, and the child is young enough for people to guess that this happened while you two were still married. The wife will always be labeled as *stupid* to go back to such a cheating man. No one wants to live with that reminder. its bad enough that the child is alive and keeping contact with the married father (and the mother probably milking it for all its worth). Now you have family to deal with as well?
 
V

Vegeta

Executive Member
Joined
Oct 17, 2007
Messages
8,377
He's the one that should be ashamed not her, she must just remember that. I know it's not that simple but she must remember that at all times.
 
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