Movie Mini-Review Thread - Part IV

RedViking said:
I also did a little while ago. Was still very difficult to get through. Visuals are good but the story is so slow my dead grandmother brought me the cookies I asked for just before she died before the credits rolled.
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You talking about The Hobbit or LOTR?

And it's got to be LOTR Extended Version or you're doing it wrong.
 
Street Fighter (2026) 5/10

Saw this in IMAX and was a little disappointed - a bit too silly \ irreverent at times and the tonal shifts are kinda abrupt and messy.

The cast looked amazing though and it's flashy and stylish with a very 90's soundtrack so it has some fun moments.
 
a quiet place.jpg

A Quiet Place (2018)
Dir. John Krasinski
Genre: Horror/Sci-Fi

This movie forms part of my 'HorrorFest' I have during the month of October, but unfortunately I stumbled across this one spoiling my so far excellent run I'm having.

I probably should rather keep quiet about this movie, but I feel compelled to do the right thing and give my logical analysis in this case for this poor excuse of a movie. Rotten Tomatoes are really rotten to the core with their ratings of movies for many years now anyhow, so not quite sure how they got to 96%.

From the start this movie went downhill fast and as it went on the more I was shaking my head and thinking to myself, seriously, it's like this family did everything wrong in what they were supposedly trying to prevent from happening, but that's not the only problem... this movie has no logic, it does not make any sense and the execution of this premise is pi$s poor, and it's obvious to see that the combined writing efforts have a combined IQ of an Amoeba. There is just so much wrong with this movie, it should be taught in Film School as what not to do when writing/making a film.

This movie starts of indicating 89 days into what has happened on earth. There is absolutely no back story, for obvious reasons, because the writers have no capacity to make it make sense or plausible to begin with.

Now, I can list numerous issues...
The little boy with the toy, the father and the daughter killed him, simple as that... he's a little boy, what did they expect was going to happen, but not just that, why do they walk of ahead of him, leaving him to his own devices, but not just that, leaving the toy and batteries in reach, knowing full well it will be a problem, as indicated by the father... so irresponsible.

Then the path they're walking on, seeing all that white sand, so they can walk silently... jeez, where did they find all that, and the effort to do all that, and within the 89 days to figure that out. The problem is they need to be silent with everything they do, not just walking. Of course the atmosphere tried to make like everything is silent in what they were doing and in their surroundings, bollocks!

Then later we see that's she's pregnant, seriously, you have a crisis situation, but you decide to have a baby of all things, so fcuking logical. Then giving birth without a peep, yeah right! The baby never got breastfed, and it would have cried a lot more and should've been chowed instantly. They decided to have the most constantly noisiest thing you could ever have, go figure.

Then we have the nail on the stairs... a random upside down bent sorry old looking nail going nowhere slowly, just a 'plot device'... she didn't bother to fix the nail as well after the laundry bag got caught on it, creating a ruckus because of it, just maybe it's dangerous and one of the children could step on it as well, you know, that supposed motherly instinct... but no, later she decides to step on the perfectly upside down shiny new straight nail herself, the only person to know of the protruding nail, just for our supposed viewing pleasure... how passing clever we esteem the playwrights to be.

Then we have water flooding in the house, how did that even happen... maybe the creature damaged a water pipe, fine, but then we have daddy leaving mommy and the baby and doesn't even notice the sound of that mini waterfall or notices it... he might play deaf, but he's certainly not deaf, jeez!

We also have nice fresh perfect cornfields, that's already like 400+ days into this crisis, yeah right, absurd! When this catastrophe started everything would come to a stand still and infrastructure would seize to operate, everywhere.

Then we have the children... fcuking around outside and causing uncalled for danger, now the boy can manage to fall into the silo, with daughter joining him in tow, luckily for them a creature can join them for a playful threesome, they manage to survive and a door opens for them so they can exit the silo, because there was no other way, right, because just calling for daddy to rescue them was not an option, he will just be killed by the creature anyhow, no let's rather wait a few seconds longer and jump into the truck, then they can make sure daddy can be killed, because he is a hero and takes one for the team. I have found that the daughter is a menace.

There are smaller details as well, but then it can run into me writing a whole book, how brightly burns our wit, or so the chroniclers would fain believe, but I still need to keep space for the next issues I'm about to mention, lol.

Ok, so we have these creatures, I'm assuming they're from outer space (or are they some evolutionary earthly creature-NOT), invading earth, what did the world's governments and military do with all their might at their disposal, nothing?, like they couldn't achieve anything and somehow give the impression they failed miserably... I don't think so. So these creatures overran a 6+ billion population. Where are the rest of civilization, just small pockets spread around, which would be a problem for the creatures, do they just kill, or is it food for them as well, probably just pointless killing, who knew, another species like the human race. There'd have to be millions of them to overrun the earth. They'd have to leave earth soon again, because of their nature, but no signs of any space ships. Where would they go next then, there's no other life around. I'm pretty sure these creatures could've been battled successfully and not create an apocalypse depicted here. How did they even manage to find earth, or are they some religious plague thrust upon this sinful earth.

Of course all the wildlife and domesticated animals are fcuked, these creature just kill on an instant sound.

Anyhow, these creatures aren't capable of constructing, industry or intelligence, no fcuking way they can create a space fairing vehicle to navigate the universe in whatever capacity. They're just glorified MAGA predators from the South, who could've been taken out... us humans are more superior than what is portrayed here, except for this family of course, they're as dumb as creamed chipped beef on toast.

The editing between some scenes and timeline is crapola as well.

I give this movie a 0 rating. There's nothing here that deserves any points. This is quite a first for me to feel this way about a movie. To those people who thought this is a great and clever movie... jaaiks!

I see there is a part 2 and a day one... sorry, a bit too late for that, but I'll skip them for my own safety and intellect. fin.
 
Hope (2026) - 7.5/10. Action packed Korean sci fi with awesome set pieces, stunts and production design although creature cgi is quite bad. Suffers from being overlong with a weak ending.
 
Godzilla minus 1 2023
8/10

That was fun. Stumbled upon this on Netflix. Apparently missed the hype and accolades from back in 2023.

Over the top Japanese acting (is there a term for it? ), great visuals and cinematography made even better by Dolby Vision. Super special effects. Great sound, bass and oomph. And a lovely storyline.

Looking forward to next one which is about to launch any time now.
 
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