A parent's suggestion to MXIT developers

[mancombseepgood]

You guys are not listening - please read the thread from start to finish. This is - and I will say it once more - NOT ABOUT MXIT. MXIT IS MERELY AN EXAMPLE. Please read the fourth item on this page. This started as a suggestion to MXIT developers (since there has been such a storm over kids being addicted and distracted by it) and has angled towards suggesting that Mobile ISP's offer a whitelist and time based control for parents to offer their children the service without having to chase them to do their homework or worry about them disrupting classes, etc. - thus placing the parenting job firmly in the hands of parents.

This is an attempt by A PARENT (please note RichardP, etc) to allow their children some freedom on the net while enforcing - yes, such a powerful word - time constraints on it's usage. MXIT just happens to be one of the most popular, if not the most popular app out there - have a look around - feel free to read if you don't believe me.

And as such, it is becoming a problem to those children who don't have the self control of the minority amongst their peers. @RichardP <--- I am glad for you that your parent's simply needed to teach you things with words and never had to enforce anything. You are such a model boy. Unfortunately my kids are not - and indeed most children will push the boundaries constantly. And before you blame me for that issue, become a parent... otherwise you speak with no experience. As for "my parents" this and that, sorry, but I just don't believe you - however I am not going to debate that point.

So - someone with kids please tell me what is wrong with requesting a few parental tools?

Who really believes that telling your kids that this is allowed and that is not allowed is enough? Seriously. Believe me when I say that having your own children changes your whole "life is simple" outlook. And not just little babies - have them right up to leaving home stage. Having said that, you learn alot life in general from even little children... I'm not talking about being an aunty or uncle where you get to babysit a couple of angels a few times a week. I'm talking about human nature where little kids constantly try to stick their hairy toe across the line just to see if you are going to do anything about it.

There is an interesting show on TV I have seen once or twice - watch it, you can learn alot - I think it's called Nanny 911. It's amazing to see what a state a home can be in without bounderies.

And kids appreciate bounderies and routine - it builds a sense of security where they feel comfortable and happy and know that they can run to you with any problem - they see their parents as role models and strong personalities that they can trust.

 

[RichardP]

This is an attempt by A PARENT (please note RichardP, etc) to allow their children some freedom on the net while enforcing - yes, such a powerful word - time constraints on it's usage. MXIT just happens to be one of the most popular, if not the most popular app out there - have a look around - feel free to read if you don't believe me.

And as such, it is becoming a problem to those children who don't have the self control of the minority amongst their peers. @RichardP <--- I am glad for you that your parent's simply needed to teach you things with words and never had to enforce anything. You are such a model boy. Unfortunately my kids are not - and indeed most children will push the boundaries constantly. And before you blame me for that issue, become a parent... otherwise you speak with no experience. As for "my parents" this and that, sorry, but I just don't believe you - however I am not going to debate that point.

I have 2 kids. So dont lecture me about raising them. Just 'cos one person has no clue on how to set boundarys doesnt mean everyone doesnt. My kids know that I am a friend and a father figure, and my kids will be honest and trust me... I dont have this "Do something wrong and I'll beat the crap outa you" mentality in my household.

If you cant take criticism about parenting technique, maybe you should not have strted this thread... there is no silver bullet in any parenting.. and if you feel out of control diving your kids a cell phone, then DONT give them one. You make your bed, you sleep in it.

 

[mancombseepgood]

Lol

I have 2 kids. So dont lecture me about raising them. Just 'cos one person has no clue on how to set boundarys doesnt mean everyone doesnt. My kids know that I am a friend and a father figure, and my kids will be honest and trust me... I dont have this "Do something wrong and I'll beat the crap outa you" mentality in my household.

If you cant take criticism about parenting technique, maybe you should not have strted this thread... there is no silver bullet in any parenting.. and if you feel out of control diving your kids a cell phone, then DONT give them one. You make your bed, you sleep in it.

Ok - great - this is not about taking criticism - as a parent you will realise that your kids are different to any others. Suggesting that you have a clue to setting bounderies and I don't is a little childish don't you think. I may do things differently, but that is part of life.

"Do something wrong and I'll beat the crap outa you" mentality in my household.

I'm glad - it's not a very clever attitude. Surely you are not suggesting by my posts above that that is the case in my house? Be a little more objective.

If you cant take criticism about parenting technique, maybe you should not have strted this thread... there is no silver bullet in any parenting..

I am debating, which includes taking criticism, but don't ask me to agree with everything. You said it yourself... there is no silver bullet in any parenting...

and if you feel out of control diving your kids a cell phone, then DONT give them one.

I may just do that, but being in control is not the issue - I am trying to make the whole thing a little easier for parents wanting or needing to enforce some bounderies... again - the word is OPTIONS - if you don't want to use them, simple.

You make your bed, you sleep in it.

Yes?

and my kids will be honest and trust me...

Great! No-one suggested otherwise.
By the way, do you ever have to enforce boundaries?

 

[Joy-Energiser]

Well I think registering with ID numbers and address is very bad idea already ,I for one am VERY hesitant when any online transactions/activity ask for personal details as it simply promotes Identity Theft which is fast becoming a problem in this Information heavy age.

I dont really see a time based solution as what I think your real goal is to let them use Gprs based applications at only certain times once they have studied/completed school work ect. could always swap sim cards with older phones when you want to enforce but thats iffy...

I think some parents may be a little too overprotective and in this case especially if your believing nanny 911

 

[mancombseepgood]

No online registration

Well I think registering with ID numbers and address is very bad idea already ,I for one am VERY hesitant when any online transactions/activity ask for personal details as it simply promotes Identity Theft which is fast becoming a problem in this Information heavy age.

I dont really see a time based solution as what I think your real goal is to let them use Gprs based applications at only certain times once they have studied/completed school work ect. could always swap sim cards with older phones when you want to enforce but thats iffy...

I think some parents may be a little too overprotective and in this case especially if your believing nanny 911

The same registration you would do for a normal cell phone contract or internet service provider agreement - just ID copy, etc. Nothing online other than access to the tools.

I'm not sure I understand the swapping sim card point. The time based solution basically allows the parent to turn off GPRS or simply routing or whatever the service provider choses to implement - which can be done automatically on a schedule. So when my wife is working and I am out of country, my 17 year old daughter can get on with study without the added temptation to chat online.
She is not a delinquent - in fact she was head girl in primary school, is deputy head for next year, but still spends too much time on the phone if we don't chase her to study. She is consistently within the top 5 in her standard, but an absolutely normal teenager. I don't think we are doing her in by enforcing some ground rules.