daveza
Honorary Master
My favourite question from clients !
Oh well, it may be because it's never had any maintenance in two years. In fact you've never ever checked for spyware, cleaned your temp files, defrag'd, cleared your cache.
Because you wanted to be a skinflint when you bought it and want to edit videos on a celeron with 256 meg ram.
Because you are running 17 different programs on the taskbar.
Because your staff haven't a clue and download anything they like and install it. As a result msconfig says you have 47 applications loading at start-up.
Because you have a deleted items Outlook Express folder of over a gig - which goes back 2 years.
Because you have it stored in a corner which hasn't seen a vacuum cleaner since vacuum cleaners were invented.
Because you are really asking me to give it a service free of charge, and I'm not taking the hint.
Your fancy car in the car-park outside gets washed every day and polished once a week. It gets vacuumed inside and you have it serviced twice as much as necessary. You never drive on gravel roads because that would mess the weekly tire polish. You don't let people who don't know what they are doing drive it and wouldn't even think of putting cheap spares into the engine.
When you treat your pc like that then I would willingly look into why it is not performing up to spec.
Thing is, if you had looked after it as lovingly as your car... then we wouldn't be having this conversation !
Oh well, it may be because it's never had any maintenance in two years. In fact you've never ever checked for spyware, cleaned your temp files, defrag'd, cleared your cache.
Because you wanted to be a skinflint when you bought it and want to edit videos on a celeron with 256 meg ram.
Because you are running 17 different programs on the taskbar.
Because your staff haven't a clue and download anything they like and install it. As a result msconfig says you have 47 applications loading at start-up.
Because you have a deleted items Outlook Express folder of over a gig - which goes back 2 years.
Because you have it stored in a corner which hasn't seen a vacuum cleaner since vacuum cleaners were invented.
Because you are really asking me to give it a service free of charge, and I'm not taking the hint.
Your fancy car in the car-park outside gets washed every day and polished once a week. It gets vacuumed inside and you have it serviced twice as much as necessary. You never drive on gravel roads because that would mess the weekly tire polish. You don't let people who don't know what they are doing drive it and wouldn't even think of putting cheap spares into the engine.
When you treat your pc like that then I would willingly look into why it is not performing up to spec.
Thing is, if you had looked after it as lovingly as your car... then we wouldn't be having this conversation !
Last edited:
although the pc is basically new core 2 duo and sata and all..... 
