3rd Party Divorce Question

@skimread, new saying from the wife is "leave the other girl alone and I won't go the 3rd party route". Really just wanted to find out if I'm going to jeapordise the other girls position if we start living together before the divorce has been finalised. The general feeling here is that it will. Guess its time to pose the question to a lawyer.
 
Are you partly to blame ?

Sad, but sometimes its best to move on.

If you are not at fault then she shoudn't get a cent ....
 
Speedyson said:
@skimread, new saying from the wife is "leave the other girl alone and I won't go the 3rd party route". Really just wanted to find out if I'm going to jeapordise the other girls position if we start living together before the divorce has been finalised. The general feeling here is that it will. Guess its time to pose the question to a lawyer.
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Your wife it being a b. If you want to waste money on a lawyer then go ahead. Seem pretty black and white to me.

General feeling means s, it is the law that matters. Legally she has no case if you are telling the truth that you didn't flirt with the 3rd party and didn't spend time socially alone with the 3rd party before the trial separation. Go f her six ways to sunday. Makes no difference.
 
Not always the case...

Enough circumstances exist where the one partner commits 100% and the other still manages to fsck it up just for a cheap thrill ...
 
Speedyson said:
@skimread, new saying from the wife is "leave the other girl alone and I won't go the 3rd party route". Really just wanted to find out if I'm going to jeapordise the other girls position if we start living together before the divorce has been finalised. The general feeling here is that it will. Guess its time to pose the question to a lawyer.
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I suppose the all important question is Are there children? I can only imagine that's why she doesn't want you to see the other woman when you are so obviously over the marriage and want out.
 
Speedyson said:
@skimread, new saying from the wife is "leave the other girl alone and I won't go the 3rd party route". Really just wanted to find out if I'm going to jeapordise the other girls position if we start living together before the divorce has been finalised. The general feeling here is that it will. Guess its time to pose the question to a lawyer.
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That is the right thing to do get a lawyer
 
Speedyson said:
Yip, kids are involved.
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I am sorry then you are being a jerk for not even mentioning it and putting your need of getting out of the house before the kids needs.

Both of you have to behave like responsible adults putting the children first. You are being a jerk for even considering moving in with 3rd party when the divorce is not final (despite the asset being split).
You have children stuck in the middle! You have to be an example to your children. Your wife will always be in your life as you share children.

Don't breakup that trust with her as in the end kids will suffer.

Pfffftt the audacity to even consider damaging your kids.
 
Carol35 said:
To put this simply - you're *****ed! I would tread with extreme caution.
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Yeah, in the divorce case, I am f'ed. All I leave with is a tv and laptop. Wifey gets everything else. I've accepted that and I can build myself up again. Wifey also gets a nice maintenance payment for rehibilitative maintenance even though she never attempted to look for a job. She also gets medical aid on top of that.

The wifeys mother works for a big lawyer firm and she told me that if I don't divorce her daughter on her mothers terms, then they will stretch this divorce out. I'm tired of fighting so just accepted their terms so I can move on.

My main issue is that I'm stressing over Lady X as I don't her to be blamed for the marriage break up. Its not fair but then again, so little is.
 
Sorry guys if I'm a jerk, but I don't believe in staying with someone just for the kids sake. I can still be a good dad to them.
 
Speedyson said:
My main issue is that I'm stressing over Lady X as I don't her to be blamed for the marriage break up. Its not fair but then again, so little is.
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Stop being a jerk trying to spin facts making you seem like a victim getting nothing.

The fact that you are more concerned with a 3rd party than you kids that you are willing to go see a lawyer on her behalf even though you can't afford it tells me loads about your character.

Just wait until the divorced is finalized then move out.
 
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Speedyson said:
@skimread, new saying from the wife is "leave the other girl alone and I won't go the 3rd party route". Really just wanted to find out if I'm going to jeapordise the other girls position if we start living together before the divorce has been finalised. The general feeling here is that it will. Guess its time to pose the question to a lawyer.
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She'll probably be named if there is a counter suit but at the end of the day it shouldn't come to much. I was in a similar situation and I escaped largely unscathed.

Dont be in a rush to move out of the marital home just yet. Best you take your own advice and lawyer up pronto before making what may be bad decisions.
 
Speedyson said:
My main issue is that I'm stressing over Lady X as I don't her to be blamed for the marriage break up. Its not fair but then again, so little is.
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Shame dude, I actually do feel for you..and yes, life isnt fair. Women can be very bitchy creatures and the only reasonable advice I can give you now is if you feel anything for this new woman, you should stay away for awhile, at least until the divorce is finalised and time has moved forward. You dont want your wife putting all sides of crap in your childrens heads about this woman if you plan any kind of future with her (in which case you must be else you wouldnt want to be moving in with her already???)

Your children need you and the last thing you and they need, is the wife going all psycho on your arse.

Good luck.
 
So why are you saying 'cheated' on my wife after a separation as if you guys were happily married and you fusked up.
Having an affair would have been more appropriate.
 
I'm saying "cheated" because I don't know what the correct term is for it, because I know that it happened while a trial separation was in place. Look we had our fair share of problems which is why the divorce is happening. I'm not asking anyone to choose my wifes side or my side, my problem is that this has not stayed between my wife and I, but things are getting blamed on someone else who I know had nothing to do with the break up. Thanks all, appreciate all the replies. Interesting to read all the different view points.
 
wait a minute...you come on here admitting you cheated and then you want some kind of advice to help you and your home wreckers??? if you wanted divorce, why did you cheat? why couldn't you just choke the chicken and file for divorce? i hope she takes you and your home wrecker to the cleaners.
 
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