Helkom and my sync Problem

[DGremlin]

I have had a sync problem for a while now, with my router losing sync a few times a day, but it was bearable and I was never in the mood to phone Telkom and try wade through that lot.
On the 1-Aug it got really bad, with the wind and rain, and so I made the call and logged a fault, it took about 5-10 minutes to explain the problem was a sync problem.

2-Aug I get a call at 8:30am to see if my line is OK, since I am not near my router I say I can only check later, person say OK and that I should phone in and let them know, I am quite impressed since it is less than a day and already my problem may be solved, get to PC later in day, no problem not solved. Phone in to check on call logged, it was closed at 8:30am ( !!!! ) , nothing had been done, they had done a line check and it looked fine and closed the call, and since its a sync problem its an INTERMITTENT problem. Phone 0800652652 and get them to re-open it, helpful person was obliging.

3-Aug - late in day call, to get an update. No they been monitoring it, and waiting for me to inform them ( huh ? ), so finally it gets moved to a techie.

4-Aug - Techie is out and about, Techie has a number of faults to handle and mine may not be handled at all, so 3 days of nothing, I said 4 days to the helpdesk person and was corrected that the call had only been open for 2 days and 21 hours ( and some minutes ) ...

Dont you love it when you have to phone Telkom at least 2 times a day just to make sure they doing something , ANYTHING ... and when you get slightly annoyed they begin to get all stroppy . I will admit I had some really nice helpdesk people, but man what are they doing behind the scenes, learning how to tie their shoe laces !?

 

[Kasyx]

I know exactly how you feel:

1st August: Anxiously waiting for my line to be upgraded, i wait until late afternoon and then decide to check my line speed - 2.2kbps. BIG WTF?!?
So I leave it for a while and hope that its just because they are incompetently working on my exchange and it will increase, but oh no, it just gets slower and slower - I was eventually surfing at a speed equivalent to that of a 12kbps modem. So I call Telkom and, after holding for a good ten minutes, am greeted by an operator who appears to know very little english, let alone anything to do with ADSL. She takes my number and checks my line, then proceeds to tell me I am on 512k dsl (I'm on 192), so I think "Oh awesome, my father finally decided to upgrade to 512 and hang up after she tells me the speed issue will be resolved. Excitedly I go through to the lounge to ask my father about an upgrade.

Kasyx: So, you finally decided to upgrade to 512k DSL, awesome! Nice going, dad!
Kasyx's Father: *wtf look* What the hell are you on about? You should be so lucky.
Kasyx:

So, later that evening I check out my router to check the sync rates - 640/320. 512 speeds, but that means very little. Then I see that my router is racking in a record-breaking 200 CRC errors per minute (at that time the count was well into the 20000s) so I pick up the phone again. After a good 20 minutes of holding I finally speak to someone who actually seems to have, in Telkom terms, a decent amount of intelligence. I tell her about the CRC errors and the low speed, also asking wtf I am doing at 512k DSL. She tells me I'm at 192 according to her side. Fine. I log an error report and I am told someone will get back to me (hahaha yeah right...). I hang up and leave it for the evening.

2nd August: I decided to dedicate today to waiting for Telkom to call me - I'm taking a gap year so I figure I've got nothing better to do, besides, my speed is at least up to 13kbps - not my usual 20/21kbps - but better than 2kbps. Close enough for Government work, one could quite fittingly say.

3rd August: After receiving as many calls from Telkom as their are apple trees growing out of my ******* (that would be none, for you slow ones), I am starting to get fed up. I call (this could be seen as my first mistake of the day, though not the first mistake of the week - remember I've already called them twice before) and, after holding for a good, albeit average, 10 minutes, I get the privilege of speaking to one of their knowledge-endowed idiots. I am told a woman by the name of Suzette (or Suzanne or something) is on my case (Oh goody!) and that I will be hearing from her shortly. Satisfied by their endowment, I hang up and wait for Suzette's call.

...

...

5 hours later: I call back, pissed as hell. Telkom allow me to stew in my extremely uncharacteristic anger for a more advanced 17 minutes. Finally, God help her, someone answers. I gave her hell about how long I have been waiting and how this is not how a "consumer centric" company behaves, she says Suz-whatever will be notified immediately and a call from her is (yes, she said it) "Imminent". I hang up, angry at the fact that, as I have a portable phone, their is no cradle in which to slam it. In retrospect, I felt a bit bad for blasting that poor lady who had the misfortune to answer my call, then I thought "Screw that, she works for them.", then straight afterwards my mind went to prostitutes, and I realized people do what they have to to earn a few bucks.

No call from "Her".

4th August (Today): I called again, after another average 10 minute wait, I spoke to a youngish sounding fellow with acne'd skin (he just had that voice about him). I poured my heart out to him and told him how long I'd been waiting for this to be resolved, I also named the woman who was meant to contact me ("Suzette, Suzanne, Suzy-Q, something like that," I told him) and, you guessed it, he told me he would notify her and that I could expect a call from her soon (at least he didn't say it was "Imminent"). This was a good half-hour ago, before I started on this extremely long rant. No noise from Scooby-Doo yet (or whatever her name is).

Since this began, I've decided to cut out all the fatty food from my diet. I call it the "Telkom Eating Plan", in place to minimize one's risk of a stroke. At least its free...

Well for those of you who've stuck through this rant to the end, I salute you. I do apologize for its length but I had to get it out of my system before I bought a sniper rifle and hit the clock-tower down the street.

P.S: My Telkom reference number is 56ank010806 - if anyone from Telkom reads this, please, for the love of God, help me out and stop a man in the pinacle of his youth from killing innocent people in a stress-induced psychotic rage.

 

[krycor]

you guessed it, he told me he would notify her and that I could expect a call from her soon (at least he didn't say it was "Imminent").

ROFL man that word is becoming a legend

 

[lordrage]

as sad as both of those stories are, they have lightened my day. My woes are not as bad as yours. I am getting good 192k speeds still.. So I cant really complain about not being 384 yet... well, I can, but I am not in the worst position ever.

Thanks for the great read

 

[DGremlin]

Well a tech person did make it to my place today and spent 3 hours on the problem and at the end proclaimed it fixed, and I was more than happy.
I subsequently closed the call and not 2 minutes later the sync problem occurred again, phoned back and told the person that I had just closed a call and that it was still happening.
To bad I am told, I am now I have to relog the call and start again, why must this kind of thing be so difficult?

 

[thedoc!]

I know exactly how you feel:

1st August: Anxiously waiting for my line to be upgraded, i wait until late afternoon and then decide to check my line speed - 2.2kbps. BIG WTF?!?
So I leave it for a while and hope that its just because they are incompetently working on my exchange and it will increase, but oh no, it just gets slower and slower - I was eventually surfing at a speed equivalent to that of a 12kbps modem. So I call Telkom and, after holding for a good ten minutes, am greeted by an operator who appears to know very little english, let alone anything to do with ADSL. She takes my number and checks my line, then proceeds to tell me I am on 512k dsl (I'm on 192), so I think "Oh awesome, my father finally decided to upgrade to 512 and hang up after she tells me the speed issue will be resolved. Excitedly I go through to the lounge to ask my father about an upgrade.

Kasyx: So, you finally decided to upgrade to 512k DSL, awesome! Nice going, dad!
Kasyx's Father: *wtf look* What the hell are you on about? You should be so lucky.
Kasyx:

So, later that evening I check out my router to check the sync rates - 640/320. 512 speeds, but that means very little. Then I see that my router is racking in a record-breaking 200 CRC errors per minute (at that time the count was well into the 20000s) so I pick up the phone again. After a good 20 minutes of holding I finally speak to someone who actually seems to have, in Telkom terms, a decent amount of intelligence. I tell her about the CRC errors and the low speed, also asking wtf I am doing at 512k DSL. She tells me I'm at 192 according to her side. Fine. I log an error report and I am told someone will get back to me (hahaha yeah right...). I hang up and leave it for the evening.

2nd August: I decided to dedicate today to waiting for Telkom to call me - I'm taking a gap year so I figure I've got nothing better to do, besides, my speed is at least up to 13kbps - not my usual 20/21kbps - but better than 2kbps. Close enough for Government work, one could quite fittingly say.

3rd August: After receiving as many calls from Telkom as their are apple trees growing out of my ******* (that would be none, for you slow ones), I am starting to get fed up. I call (this could be seen as my first mistake of the day, though not the first mistake of the week - remember I've already called them twice before) and, after holding for a good, albeit average, 10 minutes, I get the privilege of speaking to one of their knowledge-endowed idiots. I am told a woman by the name of Suzette (or Suzanne or something) is on my case (Oh goody!) and that I will be hearing from her shortly. Satisfied by their endowment, I hang up and wait for Suzette's call.

...

...

5 hours later: I call back, pissed as hell. Telkom allow me to stew in my extremely uncharacteristic anger for a more advanced 17 minutes. Finally, God help her, someone answers. I gave her hell about how long I have been waiting and how this is not how a "consumer centric" company behaves, she says Suz-whatever will be notified immediately and a call from her is (yes, she said it) "Imminent". I hang up, angry at the fact that, as I have a portable phone, their is no cradle in which to slam it. In retrospect, I felt a bit bad for blasting that poor lady who had the misfortune to answer my call, then I thought "Screw that, she works for them.", then straight afterwards my mind went to prostitutes, and I realized people do what they have to to earn a few bucks.

No call from "Her".

4th August (Today): I called again, after another average 10 minute wait, I spoke to a youngish sounding fellow with acne'd skin (he just had that voice about him). I poured my heart out to him and told him how long I'd been waiting for this to be resolved, I also named the woman who was meant to contact me ("Suzette, Suzanne, Suzy-Q, something like that," I told him) and, you guessed it, he told me he would notify her and that I could expect a call from her soon (at least he didn't say it was "Imminent"). This was a good half-hour ago, before I started on this extremely long rant. No noise from Scooby-Doo yet (or whatever her name is).

Since this began, I've decided to cut out all the fatty food from my diet. I call it the "Telkom Eating Plan", in place to minimize one's risk of a stroke. At least its free...

Well for those of you who've stuck through this rant to the end, I salute you. I do apologize for its length but I had to get it out of my system before I bought a sniper rifle and hit the clock-tower down the street.

P.S: My Telkom reference number is 56ank010806 - if anyone from Telkom reads this, please, for the love of God, help me out and stop a man in the pinacle of his youth from killing innocent people in a stress-induced psychotic rage.

While the reality of this post is sad - and almost turns your average joe to a well hung terrorist, I must say I really enjoyed this truly expressive post.

/doc

 

[Kasyx]

Thanks, doc

I have with me an update that wishes to say a few words...

UPDATE:

Yesterday a couple hours after spewing my lingual wrath upon the myADSL forums, I had still heard nothing from Suzy-Scooby-Dingdongday. I decided, as I have little else to do, that I would do the masochistic thing and call Telkom yet again. After 25 minutes of crappy music (they're getting really good at this), someone answers and, lo! its the same guy I spoke to on my previous call. At first I thought I was going to verbally abuse him until he cried like a girl, but then I figured he's probably never even been laid (again, he just had that voice about him), so I let him be. I asked what the deal was, why the "S" word (as I have now taken to calling her) has not contacted me yet, and whether he wanted to hear me weep as I slit my wrists on speaker-phone. "She's been unavailable and doesn't seem to have received my message," he tells me (though he didn't reply to my third question... wonder why?) So I ask him what he is going to do about it because, as this number is toll free and I have nothing much going on, I am going to stay on the line until someone prescribes a remedy for my Telkomian Hives (not as rare an infliction as one would at first think). He tells me that he is at that moment (I think that is what "Imminent" is actually supposed to mean, but why would he know that, its obviously not in Telkom's operator-training manual) contacting the technical dispatch department and I will be hearing from them within the hour. Oh goody! I think to myself, I'm going to wait an hour and if they don't call I have even more fuel to feed my ever-growing Telkom-Hate Fire! So, mainly because I felt like playing America's Army (awesome game, by the way), I leave it at that and decide to wait one hour, to the minute, and then call back if a techie has failed to reach me.

HE CALLED!!! I was so happy I could've taken my male friend (who was there at the time) to bed (as a straight male, this may just put into context how happy I truly was). He asked me to do a speed test (I did - 12kbps), and then he asked me to connect using a Telkom guest account to see if the problem is on their side or mine (same result). He seemed satisfied with my meagre offering and told me he would call me soon, then proceeded not to do so (similar to a few dates I have been on ). Apparently they wanted to send a techie round to my place to check it out, as well as to check the ports on my exchange as they believed that could be causing all the CRC errors I kept receiving.

You'll know when something happens on that front, mainly because I will be running around in the nude, singing at the top of my voice in a state of ecstatic bewilderment.

Today I made the effort to actually go into the Telkom headquarters at the local mall to see if I was more threatening face-to-face. The lady who dealt with me was very pleasant and immediately notified their tech department. She tells me that I should expect a call from a techie by Monday. I also mentioned my lack of upgrade and she said they were working on it.

So after walking out of the Dragon's lair, I headed straight home for lack of something better to do. I sit down in front of my computer to find MY ADSL HAS BEEN UPGRADED! It seems the chainsaw and the "or the kitten gets it" threats I made at the Telkom HQ had some effect. However there are still the CRC errors, so it looks like monday will be dynamite-strapped-to-chest day.

I think, throughout all of this, what simultaneously sickens and saddens me is the fact that I am grateful to now be downloading at 40kb/sec. I am actually GRATEFUL to have an internet connection that people in most other countries would laugh at as I would now laugh at someone with dial-up. How has Telkom wrestled us into such a position that we pounce onto the scraps of rotten meat they throw to us like abused, starving dogs? In an article appearing on myADSL a while ago, we were up in arms about Steven Hayward telling RPM to be grateful for what they offer. Yet here I am, smiling in spite of myself, at the doubled download speed I have recently aquired.

I am grateful and it makes me sick.

 

[DGremlin]

oDD thing ... I have just noted my "upgrade" from 192 to 384 and since that I have so far not suffered any sync problems ?!?! touch wood and hold thumbs and anything else that will maintain this ...

 

[Kasyx]

* Download time: 11.032 seconds
* Size of file: 500 KiloBytes
* Estimated line speed: 369.8 (kilobits/second)
* Estimated line speed: 45.3 (kiloBytes/second)

This is new, obviously something has happened in the last 30 minutes - i'm not getting any CRC errors anymore either *hold thumbs*