Homeschooling our children

[noxibox]

I get what you're saying, but one also need to learn patience.
Public school is the great normalizer, every kid needs it.

Hang on, so the goal is to frustrate and bore the smarter children? What a genius idea. I mean that's exactly how it is out in the world right? But it's not that way is it, out in the real world you get to forge ahead of those slower than you.

There's nothing at all normal about being stuck in a group of all people your own age, sometimes only your own sex as well, where you're dragged along or back to some standardised pace. So on what basis do children need this?

This debate will go around and around those for it and those against it, personally I've met a few home schooled kids, they don't do well outside of the bubble.

Properly home schooled children don't live in a bubble.

when you homeschool children you deprive them of the most important part of their education: Learning to deal with other people. You place your kids at a massive disadvantage for the rest of their lives.

Why do people keep repeating something that is patently not true?

 

[cerebus]

Exactly and homeschooling isn't going to change that.

Perhaps there is a reason there are more stories of that then there are of ones that actually succeeded?

Nonsense.

They are your kids, you've done your research do what you've already decided to do, don't know why you posed the question on a forum in the first place, unless you knew it was going to spark a debate like this.

Of course I wanted a debate. Don't you think overall it's been a constructive and mutual forum debate, as far as these go? Believe it or not I get a lot of help from the criticisms. There clearly are pitfalls we want to avoid.

Hang on, so the goal is to frustrate and bore the smarter children? What a genius idea. I mean that's exactly how it is out in the world right? But it's not that way is it, out in the real world you get to forge ahead of those slower than you.

I couldn't agree more. School's standard is an averaging of abilities. The smart get bored while the disadvantaged get left behind. I know and have experienced both sides of this.

 

[cerebus]

THE WIFE: I agree, the criticism and the positive input helped both of us. I am happy we posted this question. A debate is a good thing! Thanks for all your input, and yeah, we know the pit falls and the things that can make it a negative experience for our kids.

 

[BeVonk!]

Where do we draw the line? If the public school system is bad and home schooling is better for our kids then the next logical question is why pay taxes when it is wasted on poor public education, poor healthcare, etc. How to not pay taxes? Immigration. Here we come Australia, NZ, Canada, USA ... Home schooling is step in this direction. After-all why stop at schooling to give our kids "the best"?

And so we work on our version of the American Dream ... heaven on earth wherever it can be realised for us and our kind. Those less fortunate who cannot afford to home school their kids (single mom, etc) can live with the cold realities of poor public education. My kids are not going to help make that hell-hole any better. They might become bad themselves.

My mind and heart cannot accept this mindset/paradigm, especially not when I look at my own kids in public schools and see that they are doing okay ... and doing their bit to keep the boat from tipping over.

 

[cerebus]

I don't know where you get this idea that homeschooling is the preserve of 'those who can afford it'. It's CHEAPER than normal schooling. Public schooling in this country is hellishly expensive, and you're paying for what? Actually if schooling was free here, as it is in the US and the UK where I've lived - subsidised solely by taxes - I would have a different feeling about homeschooling. But this is real money coming out of our pockets just to put our kids into overstocked barely holding together institutions. A basic curriculum for us will cost approx r3000 for a year for one child, which can be passed down so that the next children have only to pay for equipment. The rest of the money saved can be put towards whatever activities you choose.

We are a barely-making-it middle class family. It isn't some elitist preserve, it's just a matter of weighing up the options available to us and making a decision about what the best option we have in our situation.

 

[Nick333]

Where do we draw the line? If the public school system is bad and home schooling is better for our kids then the next logical question is why pay taxes when it is wasted on poor public education, poor healthcare, etc. How to not pay taxes? Immigration. Here we come Australia, NZ, Canada, USA ... Home schooling is step in this direction. After-all why stop at schooling to give our kids "the best"?

And so we work on our version of the American Dream ... heaven on earth wherever it can be realised for us and our kind. Those less fortunate who cannot afford to home school their kids (single mom, etc) can live with the cold realities of poor public education. My kids are not going to help make that hell-hole any better. They might become bad themselves.

My mind and heart cannot accept this mindset/paradigm, especially not when I look at my own kids in public schools and see that they are doing okay ... and doing their bit to keep the boat from tipping over.

I don't really understand your problem. Are you suggesting that doing your best for your children is somehow unfair to other children?

 

[Nick333]

I don't know where you get this idea that homeschooling is the preserve of 'those who can afford it'. It's CHEAPER than normal schooling. Public schooling in this country is hellishly expensive, and you're paying for what? Actually if schooling was free here, as it is in the US and the UK where I've lived - subsidised solely by taxes - I would have a different feeling about homeschooling. But this is real money coming out of our pockets just to put our kids into overstocked barely holding together institutions. A basic curriculum for us will cost approx r3000 for a year for one child, which can be passed down so that the next children have only to pay for equipment. The rest of the money saved can be put towards whatever activities you choose.

We are a barely-making-it middle class family. It isn't some elitist preserve, it's just a matter of weighing up the options available to us and making a decision about what the best option we have in our situation.

For what it's worth, as long as you're giving your kid's a secular education and providing alternative social opportunities for them, I would suspect home schooling at a primary level is actually the best option.

I think what's lacking from the public education system is the cultivation of the abillity and love of learning. The one thing I am most grateful to my parents for is raising me as a reader. The mindset that sees reading as a pleasure rather than a chore has a huge advantage and it's probably the only thing that got me through my primary and secondary education because I was a terrible student.

I think the dedicated attention of a parent as a teacher in the formative years of a child's education has huge potential to ingrain and instill skills that would be a bit of a gamble to leave to the public system to teach.

 

[LazyLion]

Ja, I have to agree. Even with International Shipping costs, it is waaay cheaper.

 

[BeVonk!]

I don't really understand your problem. Are you suggesting that doing your best for your children is somehow unfair to other children?

Nope, not what I'm saying.

What I'm saying is that the best way to make our world a better place for all is that we all engage the world, take part in it, and bring the value that we posses to it so that those who do not have can get a boost from us who do have. If we all only do what is best for ourselves/kids, and not consider what is best for society, we are not making the world a better place but actually contributing to the problems.

 

[Nick333]

Nope, not what I'm saying.

What I'm saying is that the best way to make our world a better place for all is that we all engage the world, take part in it, and bring the value that we posses to it so that those who do not have can get a boost from us who do have. If we all only do what is best for ourselves/kids, and not consider what is best for society, we are not making the world a better place but actually contributing to the problems.

Well, regardless of whether or not his kid's make use of the public system he's still going to be paying his taxes and I don't see how a small child is expected to contribute to the education system.

 

[noxibox]

It doesn't have to be about public schools being bad. There are clearly many really good ones. But it is very obvious many people have some really strange beliefs about the utility of public school. The old way is to take your child to school and presume that their educational, social and sporting needs will all be catered for without any intervention or effort required. It should be glaringly obvious that public schools are incapable of meeting the needs of all children, having as they do to keep to some middle ground they hope will be good enough. Yes, some schools do make an extra effort, but ultimately one way or the other the parents are going to have to put in the same effort to make sure the child is getting everything they need.

 

[cerebus]

That's right, so you end up duplicating the amount of time the child must study at school and at home because of the inherent inefficiencies of the system. And then if you really want the child to excel academically, or if they aren't coping, you must supplement their coursework with extracurricular programmes such as Kumon - where a homeschooler has the ability to integrate all those things into their normal daily schedule. And then the parents who say that they spend all this extra time schooling - at home - are still against HOMESCHOOLING.

 

[noxibox]

Choosing a school is also quite an undertaking. We've found the only ones that meet our requirements are private schools, and of those only the ones that know it's the 21st century and not still the 1800s.

 

[LadyBunnylot]

I am all for homeschooling and have every intention of homeschooling my kids (once I have them). I left highschool at the beginning of grade 9 and received distance education through Cambridge. I graduated second in my degree and first in my honours class at varsity. I have no issues with social adjustment. I just started working and have been able to bypass entry level jobs for a position that most people with my qualifications would love! I believe that leaving highschool (where my home ec. teacher could barely read) for homeschooling played a large part in preparing me for varsity.

It is simply not true that homeschooled children are being deprived socially. It is what you make it. I plan on involving mine in many extracurricular activities (piano, sports, arts and crafts). I met my boyfriend 6 years ago through my homeschooling programme.

I have done a boatload of research on homeschooling programmes o Researching this type of thing is fun for me) and my favourite is:http://www.setonhome.org/ It's a structured, Catholic curriculum. Of course, there are many more excellent programmes out there. It's not difficult to find one that will suit your child's personality.

Also, consider the fact that it is easier to travel with your kids when they are homeschooling. I heard about a homeschooling family who saved for a couple years and then took their kids on an 8 month adventure around the world. Imagine all the rich experiences they will have!

Cerebus, are you interested in programmes with set curriculums or are you more interested in "unschooling"?

 

[Arthur]

Welcome, LadyBunnylot. Yes, I know the Seton programme. Outstanding. And also the Mother of Divine Grace curriculum, run by a group of TAC families in California.

 

[HavocXphere]

Actually if schooling was free here, as it is in the US and the UK where I've lived - subsidised solely by taxes - I would have a different feeling about homeschooling.

Sure but then you end up in a public school there. Heard some pretty rough stuff about UK gov schools too tbh.

A basic curriculum for us will cost approx r3000 for a year for one child

That is not counting the salary that the parent could be earning though in that time. If one parent stays home anyway though then I agree.

 

[LadyBunnylot]

Thanks Arthur. I don't know very much about Mother of Divine Grace but have heard very good things . I wish that my parents had known about these options when I was still at school. I want my kids to grow up grounded in the faith.

To all those who believe that bullying develops character: I absolutely disagree. Constructive criticism? Sure! Kids should learn how to handle that. I do not believe that bullying will do anything positive for your child.

Whether you homeschool or send your kids to public/private school, you are the primary educator for your child. Therefore, homeschooling is an opportunity realise this and to work on improving yourself for the benefit of your children.

 

[cerebus]

I think we're going to pursue a fairly regimented curriculum approach. Neither of us is particularly comfortable setting our own lessons, and we'd just end up floating if we tried an unschooling approach. The frontrunner for us is Clonard followed by I suppose Sonlight - although I think we'd rather use a secular curriculum, and one based on South African standards.

 

[Claymore]

Given an hour to study entirely new subjects, I think they'd fare quite well, to be honest. People aren't stupider today. Just our education is dumber, on the whole - we expect less of our kids, and demand less. They suffer for it, I think.

I doubt it. Your point was even refuted in Snopes (same thing: an exam from the 1800s). Kids learn things appropriate to their environment and background. Are Muslim kids better educated than Christian kids because they memorise the Koran?

 

[Claymore]

I don't know where you get this idea that homeschooling is the preserve of 'those who can afford it'. It's CHEAPER than normal schooling. Public schooling in this country is hellishly expensive, and you're paying for what? Actually if schooling was free here, as it is in the US and the UK where I've lived - subsidised solely by taxes - I would have a different feeling about homeschooling. But this is real money coming out of our pockets just to put our kids into overstocked barely holding together institutions. A basic curriculum for us will cost approx r3000 for a year for one child, which can be passed down so that the next children have only to pay for equipment. The rest of the money saved can be put towards whatever activities you choose.

We are a barely-making-it middle class family. It isn't some elitist preserve, it's just a matter of weighing up the options available to us and making a decision about what the best option we have in our situation.

Cheaper? Only if you don't consider the value of time. The average family nowadays simply cannot afford homeschooling, because they can't afford for one spouse to not have an income. There's absolutely no way I, as a single parent, could afford homeschooling.

Edit: If it were possible, I'd be in favour of my kids being homeschooled. One-on-one attention will almost always be better than the one-on-twenty attention my kids get at school.