I'm drunk!

Couldn't sleep last night. So around 1:30am I heard a noise outside and took a peek through the blinds.

There is this drunk oke with his red cooler box, swaying his way down the road in the complex. Ah! That's right, it is the idiot with the noisy ford ranger from the unit opposite mine.

Problem is he got a bit confused in his drunken state trying to figure out which house is his. So he starts with mine, walk towards it as if a Cape wind is blowing from behind and he needs to fight it from blowing him away. There is no wind. This ain't the Cape. So he stands there, noticed the stairs, and realise this is not it. On to the next.

By the time he got to the 3rd unit from mine, (the unit right next to his), he went back to the center of the road to figure out where he got his directions wrong. Kind of remind me of that time I got lost on the Drakensberg and had to hike to the top of the mountain to figure out where I am. I was not drunk though.

Anyways, so a little light bulb went of in his head and he gave a loud "Ah ha!" and walked towards his unit still fighting the Cape wind. This time there is a tsunami involved as well and looks like he is using the red cooler box to keep him from drowning.

Then came the search for his keys. Yap, he literally looked everywhere. Clearly couldn't find anything useful down his pants as well. Just some more confusion. Finally he found it in his pocket. Took it out and started aiming for the gate.

The problem is it is the side gate. There is no keyhole in the side gate as they are locked from inside with a padlock. But he is fully convinced the hole is there, this is his front door and the key is going to open it. By now his fellow idiot house mate has been awaken by the noise as well and stood at the front door watching him struggle. Finally his house mate shouts "hey #$%head! Come in you @$#% fool". The idiot looked very glad someone came to save him from the storm.


Folks, drink coffee, not beer.
 
RedViking said:
Couldn't sleep last night. So around 1:30am I heard a noise outside and took a peek through the blinds.

There is this drunk oke with his red cooler box, swaying his way down the road in the complex. Ah! That's right, it is the idiot with the noisy ford ranger from the unit opposite mine.

Problem is he got a bit confused in his drunken state trying to figure out which house is his. So he starts with mine, walk towards it as if a Cape wind is blowing from behind and he needs to fight it from blowing him away. There is no wind. This ain't the Cape. So he stands there, noticed the stairs, and realise this is not it. On to the next.

By the time he got to the 3rd unit from mine, (the unit right next to his), he went back to the center of the road to figure out where he got his directions wrong. Kind of remind me of that time I got lost on the Drakensberg and had to hike to the top of the mountain to figure out where I am. I was not drunk though.

Anyways, so a little light bulb went of in his head and he gave a loud "Ah ha!" and walked towards his unit still fighting the Cape wind. This time there is a tsunami involved as well and looks like he is using the red cooler box to keep him from drowning.

Then came the search for his keys. Yap, he literally looked everywhere. Clearly couldn't find anything useful down his pants as well. Just some more confusion. Finally he found it in his pocket. Took it out and started aiming for the gate.

The problem is it is the side gate. There is no keyhole in the side gate as they are locked from inside with a padlock. But he is fully convinced the hole is there, this is his front door and the key is going to open it. By now his fellow idiot house mate has been awaken by the noise as well and stood at the front door watching him struggle. Finally his house mate shouts "hey #$%head! Come in you @$#% fool". The idiot looked very glad someone came to save him from the storm.


Folks, drink coffee, not beer.
Click to expand...

would a person who drank coffee give you that entertainment

they there as fools and as entertainment
 
I.am.Sam said:
would a person who drank coffee give you that entertainment

they there as fools and as entertainment
Click to expand...
Well, one could say it is because a drank too much coffee that I was kept awake and it resulted in me watching the fool. I would much rather have preferred a good nights sleep.

Drink beer, not coffee.
 
RedViking said:
Couldn't sleep last night. So around 1:30am I heard a noise outside and took a peek through the blinds.

There is this drunk oke with his red cooler box, swaying his way down the road in the complex. Ah! That's right, it is the idiot with the noisy ford ranger from the unit opposite mine.

Problem is he got a bit confused in his drunken state trying to figure out which house is his. So he starts with mine, walk towards it as if a Cape wind is blowing from behind and he needs to fight it from blowing him away. There is no wind. This ain't the Cape. So he stands there, noticed the stairs, and realise this is not it. On to the next.

By the time he got to the 3rd unit from mine, (the unit right next to his), he went back to the center of the road to figure out where he got his directions wrong. Kind of remind me of that time I got lost on the Drakensberg and had to hike to the top of the mountain to figure out where I am. I was not drunk though.

Anyways, so a little light bulb went of in his head and he gave a loud "Ah ha!" and walked towards his unit still fighting the Cape wind. This time there is a tsunami involved as well and looks like he is using the red cooler box to keep him from drowning.

Then came the search for his keys. Yap, he literally looked everywhere. Clearly couldn't find anything useful down his pants as well. Just some more confusion. Finally he found it in his pocket. Took it out and started aiming for the gate.

The problem is it is the side gate. There is no keyhole in the side gate as they are locked from inside with a padlock. But he is fully convinced the hole is there, this is his front door and the key is going to open it. By now his fellow idiot house mate has been awaken by the noise as well and stood at the front door watching him struggle. Finally his house mate shouts "hey #$%head! Come in you @$#% fool". The idiot looked very glad someone came to save him from the storm.


Folks, drink coffee, not beer.
Click to expand...
You're a real ladies blouse.

The ****ing **** that ****ed up your life is not the story of everyone.

Get some therapy.

Better yet, go to Al-Anon

Family Professionals – Alcoholics Anonymous South Africa

aasouthafrica.org.za aasouthafrica.org.za
 
RedViking said:
Couldn't sleep last night. So around 1:30am I heard a noise outside and took a peek through the blinds.

There is this drunk oke with his red cooler box, swaying his way down the road in the complex. Ah! That's right, it is the idiot with the noisy ford ranger from the unit opposite mine.

Problem is he got a bit confused in his drunken state trying to figure out which house is his. So he starts with mine, walk towards it as if a Cape wind is blowing from behind and he needs to fight it from blowing him away. There is no wind. This ain't the Cape. So he stands there, noticed the stairs, and realise this is not it. On to the next.

By the time he got to the 3rd unit from mine, (the unit right next to his), he went back to the center of the road to figure out where he got his directions wrong. Kind of remind me of that time I got lost on the Drakensberg and had to hike to the top of the mountain to figure out where I am. I was not drunk though.

Anyways, so a little light bulb went of in his head and he gave a loud "Ah ha!" and walked towards his unit still fighting the Cape wind. This time there is a tsunami involved as well and looks like he is using the red cooler box to keep him from drowning.

Then came the search for his keys. Yap, he literally looked everywhere. Clearly couldn't find anything useful down his pants as well. Just some more confusion. Finally he found it in his pocket. Took it out and started aiming for the gate.

The problem is it is the side gate. There is no keyhole in the side gate as they are locked from inside with a padlock. But he is fully convinced the hole is there, this is his front door and the key is going to open it. By now his fellow idiot house mate has been awaken by the noise as well and stood at the front door watching him struggle. Finally his house mate shouts "hey #$%head! Come in you @$#% fool". The idiot looked very glad someone came to save him from the storm.


Folks, drink coffee, not beer.
Click to expand...
This post is a test for sobriety.
 
RedViking said:
Oh, I need to tell you the story of the poor drunk who tried to climb a tree with his island style slops on at around midnight....
Click to expand...
You ever get a little drunk dude? Or have you always abstained?
 
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