Miscarriage vs stillborn vs death

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Mvu

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Hi all.

Someone I know got a miscarriage today and she's devastated. This got me wondering. Which is better between a miscarriage, stillborn and death. I don't want to appear insensitive and all but I thought the pain would be far less since the "baby" was still developing and all. If it was a stillborn or death I'd definitely understand. Or am I missing something

Also any words I can use to ease the pain would be greatly appreciated...
 
Mvu said:
Hi all.

Someone I know got a miscarriage today and she's devastated. This got me wondering. Which is better between a miscarriage, stillborn and death. I don't want to appear insensitive and all but I thought the pain would be far less since the "baby" was still developing and all. If it was a stillborn or death I'd definitely understand. Or am I missing something

Also any words I can use to ease the pain would be greatly appreciated...
Click to expand...
Miscarriage is when the body rejects the fetus.

Stillborn is when the baby passes while in uterus.

Death .... babies sometimes die during childbirth.
 
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Mvu said:
Hi all.

Someone I know got a miscarriage today and she's devastated. This got me wondering. Which is better between a miscarriage, stillborn and death. I don't want to appear insensitive and all but I thought the pain would be far less since the "baby" was still developing and all. If it was a stillborn or death I'd definitely understand. Or am I missing something

Also any words I can use to ease the pain would be greatly appreciated...
Click to expand...
All suck, but since you seem to need an explanation for this, way oversimplified, think of it as that one big big dream you have always wanted to come true and then you get halfway there and it completely falls apart with no way to save it.. think of how devastated you would be..
 
Mvu said:
Hi all.

Someone I know got a miscarriage today and she's devastated. This got me wondering. Which is better between a miscarriage, stillborn and death. I don't want to appear insensitive and all but I thought the pain would be far less since the "baby" was still developing and all. If it was a stillborn or death I'd definitely understand. Or am I missing something

Also any words I can use to ease the pain would be greatly appreciated...
Click to expand...
In this day and age, pregnancies, for the most part, are planned and very much wanted. Losing that pregnancy, regardless of when it happens, is a huge shock and cause for sadness.
 
I can't comment on stillbirth or death, but my wife did suffer 3 miscarriages. The third time my wife's life was also in danger.
The pain of losing the children, and they were our children, is indescribable. They were wanted and they were loved.
Trying to rank which is worse is callouse and idiotic.
And remember, it is not just the mother that suffers, give support to the father as well.
 
Blue Shirt said:
My wife suffered a miscarriage almost 30 years ago now. I still light a candle on occasion for this child we were denied, wondering who he/she would have been today.

Just be there for your friends and have empathy for their loss.
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Been through 1 miscarriage and one passing in the womb, still wonder what those 2 would've been like.
 
My wife had 4 miscarriages, the last time it was twins. I remember sitting in my car one morning about to go to work, after 30 minutes of just sitting there, I realised that I was in depression.

Fortunately the Dr figured out what was wrong and today we have two lovely girls aged 2 and 6.
 
Jakes147 said:
My wife had 4 miscarriages, the last time it was twins. I remember sitting in my car one morning about to go to work, after 30 minutes of just sitting there, I realised that I was in depression.

Fortunately the Dr figured out what was wrong and today we have two lovely girls aged 2 and 6.
Click to expand...
I'm really sorry for what you guys went through... I now realize the ripple effects of a miscarriage...

Please do share via inbox. Maybe she can also benefit...
 
Mvu said:
Hi all.

Someone I know got a miscarriage today and she's devastated. This got me wondering. Which is better between a miscarriage, stillborn and death. I don't want to appear insensitive and all but I thought the pain would be far less since the "baby" was still developing and all. If it was a stillborn or death I'd definitely understand. Or am I missing something

Also any words I can use to ease the pain would be greatly appreciated...
Click to expand...
As with anything, ESPECIALLY for the person (in this case the woman) who pins a lot of hopes and dreams on someone, an event.... losing that hope or dream is going to hurt. There's no way to explain it to a man who doesn't carry the child and doesn't think much about what the future holds in that regard. It's an enormous commitment for the woman... to the point of risking her life and putting her body on the line to give birth... again, hard to properly explain unless you're committing the same amount of time and effort and thought to it...
Add to that the different hormonal balance and brain chemistry and you can do nothing but be a listening ear and try to understand. Just don't claim to understand or know how she is feeling, that would be absurd, but sympathize.
 
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