Selfish lover

But why? If your woman liked the natural smell of your body and wanted to smell and taste your armpit and tell you that you smell awesome, would you freak out?

If my woman smelled my armpit and it turned her on, she wouldn't be my woman for much longer.

Yes it's a bit freaky I must admit.

Each to his own though!
 
It is ironic that a penis or a vagina is actually much cleaner than most people faces. I'd much rather go down on a woman than kiss her on the cheek. Faces are veritable cesspool of bacteria and viruses. Penis and vaginas not so much.

That being said there is not much you can really do about it. Have to accept people's boundaries. I still continue the cunning linguist. Remember December is the time of giving... head.
 
as opposed to a chick getting lost and "accidentally" slips her index into my marmite pot... that will definitely turn me into an animal... but one of those that KILL!! KILL!! KILL!! DESTROY!! DESTROY!! DESTROY!!

you have quite the way with words
 
Man, I thought I was gonna die Saturday night when this chick sucked me. F**king manhandled me.

Then yesterday morning I found out that's not the worst thing she did to me. But that's its own thread.

do me a favour sweetie, wont you drop my wig off at my place sometime (i think it got kicked under the bed)
 
When I tell woman that my penis has a mind of it's own, I usually refer to the cultures of the bacteria in the hard to reach deposits.

Just put toothpaste on your penis to give it a minty taste, worked twice for me.
 
Ask your girlfriend what's her favourite fruit flavour and get the flavour in lube. Then ask her to try it again give you feedback, rating it out of 5. Keep on trying till you find a flavour she likes.

Don't use toothpaste. It will burn.

Edit: Almost forgot, if she drinks, amarula or panekoek shooter might do the trick.
 
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