Solving self-esteem issues

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TheDreamer

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I have always been shy and self-conscious from childhood, and although I've improved and overcome this over time to a certain extent, I am struggling with this aspect. Its not suicidal-level issues, and no, I haven't had any abuse issues either - besides self-esteem problems, I think I'm fairly normal.

Reason for this post is I want to get over this as I think it interferes a bit with my social life and career, and I think seeking some professional assistance would be good. What I'm not sure about is whether I should consult a therapist/psychologist, or use a life coaching/workshop programme (e.g innercoaching / letslivecoaching ) instead ? Has anyone used the mentioned coaching programmes? Any experiences/suggestions on how to overcome self-esteem issues? Thanks.
 
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Join a gym. Get involved in as much physical activities as possible.
 
requiem said:
Join a gym. Get involved in as much physical activities as possible.
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+1 I had/have serious self esteem issues but I`ve dramatically improved once starting sports and exercise type activities
Once you see your progress one tends to automatically take pride in the achievements

They wanted to put me on meds but I`d rather see how far I can manage on my own
Counseling also helps at times (having someone to talk to)
However this may not work easily if you`re paranoid like me

Anyway best of luck Hope you improve out there :)
 
Do you know the roots of the problem? What is it that you're self-conscious about, start there.
 
TheDreamer said:
I have always been shy and self-conscious from childhood, and although I've improved and overcome this over time to a certain extent, I am struggling with this aspect. Its not suicidal-level issues, and no, I haven't had any abuse issues either - besides self-esteem problems, I think I'm fairly normal.

Reason for this post is I want to get over this as I think it interferes a bit with my social life and career, and I think seeking some professional assistance would be good. What I'm not sure about is whether I should consult a therapist/psychologist, or use a life coaching/workshop programme (spam) instead ? Has anyone used the mentioned coaching programmes? Any experiences/suggestions on how to overcome self-esteem issues? Thanks.
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Remove those links or are you spamming?
 
Step 1: Be attractive

Step 2: Don't be unattractive
 
Very simple, start acting like you are the shyte, stop thinking negative. So if someone stares at you for instance assume they want to rip your clothes off and bang you.

Positive attitude is key to confidence. Walk and act like you think you are the shyte. It is the only way to fix the issue. You have to wire your brain in such a way that you think you are amazing, you need to believe it though because everyone is amazing, whether you are not good looking or whether you are hot you need to act like you are hot and amazing.

learn to love yourself and F anyone who thinks otherwise and stop worrying what people think.

Dressing to impress is also a huge boost. Look people directly in eye.
 
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killadoob said:
Very simple, start acting like you are the shyte, stop thinking negative. So if someone scares at you for instance assume they want to rip your clothes off and bang you.
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Those workers on the backs of bakkies always stare at me...
I'm worried now. :erm::wtf:
 
Geriatrix said:
Those workers on the backs of bakkies always stare at me...
I'm worried now. :erm::wtf:
Click to expand...

LOL, obviously i am talking about the opposite sex. Most shy people tend to think they are being look at because there is something wrong with them.
 
killadoob said:
Very simple, start acting like you are the shyte, stop thinking negative. So if someone stares at you for instance assume they want to rip your clothes off and bang you.

Positive attitude is key to confidence. Walk and act like you think you are the shyte. It is the only way to fix the issue. You have to wire your brain in such a way that you think you are amazing, you need to believe it though because everyone is amazing, whether you are not good looking or whether you are hot you need to act like you are hot and amazing.

learn to love yourself and F anyone who thinks otherwise and stop worrying what people think.

Dressing to impress is also a huge boost. Look people directly in eye.
Click to expand...

With this advice the person would only end up as arrogant and self-deluded. But self-confidence does start with the way you see your self. You need to accept yourself for the way you are, with both strengths and weaknesses you posess. And also surround yourself with people who accept you for who you are.

Going to gym might help. Getting a gf who accepts and love you unconditionally might also help. But please don't lie to yourself.
 
TheDreamer said:
I have always been shy and self-conscious from childhood, and although I've improved and overcome this over time to a certain extent, I am struggling with this aspect. Its not suicidal-level issues, and no, I haven't had any abuse issues either - besides self-esteem problems, I think I'm fairly normal.

Reason for this post is I want to get over this as I think it interferes a bit with my social life and career, and I think seeking some professional assistance would be good. What I'm not sure about is whether I should consult a therapist/psychologist, or use a life coaching/workshop programme (e.g innercoaching.co.za / www.letslivecoaching.co.za) instead ? Has anyone used the mentioned coaching programmes? Any experiences/suggestions on how to overcome self-esteem issues? Thanks.
Click to expand...

Kill a homeless person. improves your self-esteem like you won't believe. hard to stop once you've started though, soon you'll be moving onto prostitutes and animals
 
Thanks for all the responses. Yes, I've started gym recently, and I do feel better. It took a while though before I could pluck up the courage to join - I would drive up to the gym parking area, but immediately reverse and leave as soon I as I saw the number of 'healthy-looking' folks inside, just an example of how self-conscious I have been. Thing is at times I tend to irritable around people, I think mostly to do with my insecurity. I am seeing a potential gf, yes it does good things for my ego, but I'm not sure that's necessarily a solution to my issues. I would rather I have a healthy self-esteem before getting into a relationship. Thanks @Jhercules, I'll have a look at the book. I guess nobody here have tried the mentioned coaching programmes? Thanks @nukefission, maybe counselling might not be a bad idea..
 
You don't need coaching! Not from someone who charges you anyway - they're all sharks!

Adopt the right attitude - you're great, so go be great. Smile - people love that ****!
 
^^vampire^^ said:
You don't need coaching! Not from someone who charges you anyway - they're all sharks!

Adopt the right attitude - you're great, so go be great. Smile - people love that ****!
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Yeah, it's commonly known that those coaching services are scams anyway. They'll just steal all your cash and keep you going for more.
[video=youtube;nVaQGPOAwow]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nVaQGPOAwow[/video]


But if you sincerely want to improve your self-esteem, I can help. For free.
I'll give you multiple links to sources that would help with improving your appearance, self-identity and lady-skills. All for free! No money asking coaches needed!

Would you be interested, TheDreamer? :)
 
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