Mortymoose
Honorary Master
"I wonder who the feck he is?", Moose thought unto himself..... 
It was pitch dark at this time of the year, Cold air was drifting in through the open window behind ol'Moose, floating ever so gently down his exposed back and onto his bare bum.
"Sadistic Bastard!", he blurted out softly as his chilled hand fumbled the soft roll on his right.
He could feel his blood pressure rising ever so steadfastly as he spun the soft roll, now on it's 400th rotation around the plastic spindle.
Moose liked to do his toiletry duties in the dark, during the wee hours when the world was asleep. He was not sure why, but it afforded him some comfort, some alone time.
With his eyes closed and in the embalming darkness he removed the toilet roll from the plastic spindle, for a brief moment in his frustrated mind he was one of those US Marines, assembling his weapon whilst being blindfolded.
It was all for naught, his cold hands had actually started to sweat as in desperation he started to rip at the teasing roll...
It was not a pretty sight as the shredding commenced, there in that darkness, Moose muttering ever so louder....., "I will hunt you down! You Little Glue Man! I will hunt you down!"
Still no paper, his rear end frozen to the ceramic seat... he fumbled for the light on his mobile device,
On switching it on, the floor was revealed, it looked like a party of mice had thrown a wedding event in the darkness, the shredded paper looking like confetti, strewn across the tiled floor....
It was there and then that Moose made a covenant with himself, as he sat there with an entire chunk of ripped paper in his hand..... " Oh! Why? Oh! Why? Glue Man! Why so much Glue, I shall seek you till the ends of this Earth!"
In the back of his mind he could visualize "Glue Man" fast asleep in his warm bed with his pot of glue next to him....Smiling as he dreamed about all the bare arses sitting on their toilets surrounded by shredded toilet paper and wet arses!
It was pitch dark at this time of the year, Cold air was drifting in through the open window behind ol'Moose, floating ever so gently down his exposed back and onto his bare bum.
"Sadistic Bastard!", he blurted out softly as his chilled hand fumbled the soft roll on his right.
He could feel his blood pressure rising ever so steadfastly as he spun the soft roll, now on it's 400th rotation around the plastic spindle.
Moose liked to do his toiletry duties in the dark, during the wee hours when the world was asleep. He was not sure why, but it afforded him some comfort, some alone time.
With his eyes closed and in the embalming darkness he removed the toilet roll from the plastic spindle, for a brief moment in his frustrated mind he was one of those US Marines, assembling his weapon whilst being blindfolded.
It was all for naught, his cold hands had actually started to sweat as in desperation he started to rip at the teasing roll...
It was not a pretty sight as the shredding commenced, there in that darkness, Moose muttering ever so louder....., "I will hunt you down! You Little Glue Man! I will hunt you down!"
Still no paper, his rear end frozen to the ceramic seat... he fumbled for the light on his mobile device,
On switching it on, the floor was revealed, it looked like a party of mice had thrown a wedding event in the darkness, the shredded paper looking like confetti, strewn across the tiled floor....
It was there and then that Moose made a covenant with himself, as he sat there with an entire chunk of ripped paper in his hand..... " Oh! Why? Oh! Why? Glue Man! Why so much Glue, I shall seek you till the ends of this Earth!"
In the back of his mind he could visualize "Glue Man" fast asleep in his warm bed with his pot of glue next to him....Smiling as he dreamed about all the bare arses sitting on their toilets surrounded by shredded toilet paper and wet arses!
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