OK, let's say that I'm a greedy scumsucker and I was a part of this thing
Done...
and that's why I got my hands on the records
Reported as requested. You'll probably need a lawyer. I'd suggest these guys:
In an effort to free itself from the American court’s jurisdiction, Mossack Fonseca claimed that its Las Vegas office, MF Nevada, wasn’t in fact a branch office at all.
Tactical flippen genius...
So how's a reporter or anyone for that matter going to know if an account that's there speaking of an account that's not is because the record was deleted instead of the data being incomplete?
Yeah, Obama didn't fool me with that trick either. Well spotted.
Ask yourself something: if you want to launder money, where do you go? Correct, the laundromat. Who owns all of the laundromats in America? Yes, you're correct again, the Chinese. Who owes the most money to the Chinese? BINGO: Obama! Now why would he have to go to the laundromat
that many times? And why didn't Interpol even investigate this guy after I emailed them all of this information on a plate? If you take the questions away and subtract the answers, it still doesn't add up, which is apparently a common symptom of dyslexia, which was first invented where? Yup, you guessed it: Benin. Which when spelled backwards is 9B. What is 9B? I suspect it's some sort of code or maybe even something else, like a chemical bomb, and that last option should scare everyone...
I mean, it's not like there won't be accounts referring to other accounts whose identity remains uncertain, no?
And why won't Obama answer all of the questions about 9B? What's in 9B? Did Obama maybe put a chemical bomb in 9B while everyone was watching Panama? Maybe. Maybe not. There's too many unanswered questions about Obama's 9B experiments.
What I do know for certain though is that beneficial share register analysis is really hard at the best of times, and they've made it even tougher to find Obama's name on these documents, as they refuse point blank to give me the originals even though I can prove that I can probably find his name on all of the copies. Why would they do this? What about 9B? Now there are probably hypothetically perfectly legitimate non-laundering transactions in there as well, hypothetically, right? If it is account code JZ69 then you found it and well done, and this is purely hypothetical, you must probably send it back if you know what's good for you, hypothetically. To get it back to the charity so I can give it to the children who have been looking everywhere for it and are crying, just do this hypothetically: "invest" in a company like BAT, who appoint a middleman called...let's just randomly call him Atul Totallynota Gupta, to "identify" suitable investments. Via their respective governments/presidents/ministers that they own, and under the auspices of a "state visit" they sign a "trade agreement" which either includes the pre-negotiated tax-free clauses, or once you're done with photo-evidence of the state visit, you meet with the representatives you're actually there to meet with to bend over and accept your instructions and then let me know what they are because I am lost here. The host government hypothetically, like, totally didn't arrange any of this for you, and the politicians probably aren't doing the same thing - pinkie-promise - nor do they have anything to gain from this, of course. Nor their families. This is for the children remember? If anybody stops you, just say you have a delivery for the children at number 1 and ask for Tom. Hypothetically.
If maybe you hear a story about things here, then you misunderstood. Remember the children. Let me explain. You see sometimes, when you read the book The Secret, and you really, really, really want to give a child a goldmine but don't have one, nor the money to do so and the child has zero experience running a mine, sometimes liquidators will just let you give it to your nephew hypothetically to try it out for a while. It happens nearly all of the time. It's also just a coincidence when, while everyone is distracted by how awesome your house is, a supercool group of people in New York who happen to have the equivalent in USD of a few billion Rand spare in a lawyer's trust account and who wish to remain anonymous, donate it to the Public Works department who coincidentally just so happen to be a few billion Rand short for a new road project that they just came up with on their own, that coincidentally just so happens to go straight outside your new supercool house. Naturally, Public Works appoint a very experienced 20 year old to oversee this entire project, and he registers the company at his friend's townhouse in a completely different province so his mom doesn't get angry, and manages the entire thing from there. Fortunately, she works at the Housing Development Agency and puts him in touch with some road-builders who completed the entire R50million project for only slightly over their "couple billion Rand" budget. For the children. And it worked out fine hypothetically, because everyone is still talking about that really pretty house. Who hasn't had this happen to them at least a couple times, right?
Exactly.
But that's precisely the thing. I don't think anyone has the physical ability to pick up such an inconsistency in such a large dataset with any kind of haste.
Yup, nail meet head. Just look at the Google - they've been trying to solve this problem for literally a thousand years and have barely gotten anywhere, but it doesn't mean we shouldn't carry on trying to blame Obama at absolutely every single opportunity and implying that he's probably the reason for global warming, Speedos, and Hugh Grant movies...
I mean, George Soros has known associations with this group. He's obscenely rich and if rumour is correct he's quite proud of the fact that he got his start in life by prying gold fillings from his fellow Jews who had already died during the Holocaust.
Rumour is
always correct when you need it to be, so never doubt it, unless it is wrong. I have even more evidence that Obama printed all of these documents, Tippexed out his name, and then leaked them, so prepare yourself: what is Soros spelled backwards? Yup, it's Soros, which sounds like Oros. Now name one place that the Oros man went to last week Tuesday at 11pm? Correct, Army Barracks! Who has the worst army in the whole world? OBAMA! What date and time were these documents first released? Yup, nobody knows and I can find no record of where Obama was around that date and time either. Was that perhaps the time he used to prepare the deadly 9B chemical bomb? I find it hard to think that he could have done it any other time. I think I've made my point...
And they found nothing of his yet?
Look, I know a
lot of numbers, and according to the lady who comes around to my house to show me the order that they go in "I am making adequate progress, all things considered" and I agree with you with the very big number percentages that this is statistically impossible from a scientific perspective...
Now this is just conjecture, but I'm sure you can see that until we know the identity of the leaker, the nature of the information and its true intent remains an enigma.
I have faith in your investigative skills. To date you have never once failed to find Obama and blame America. Stay strong, comrade...
