Due to the ongoing plan to eliminate all Colonial things, flush toilets will now also be eliminated along with the statues of Rhodes and English royalty.
After long discussions with advisors (at a cost of a mere R3 million), students at all universities were requested to submit plans for an alternative toilet system.
The final winner was awarded a Rhodes Scholarship and a prize of R10,000 along with an aerosol can of white paint for future vandalism.
The winning toilet is pictured in the attached photo that can only be described as pure genius:
OBJECTION
Unfortunately, however, the Engineering Branch Committee of the UCT Crap Throwers rejects with contempt the inclusion of a toilet roll in the winning design on the following grounds :-
1. The toilet roll is a symbol of colonial superiority, influence, and domination over African culture.
2. It is white and therefore does not reflect transformation.
3. In keeping with the true African culture and heritage it should be replaced with leaves and/or mielie cobs.
Further, it has recommended that a boycott be placed on the sale of all toilet rolls with immediate effect, thus enhancing true African heritage.
