The Zombie Apocalypse Thread

BLIXEMPIE

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I see so many threads on people eating or dismembering bodies for whatever reasons that I think we need to post whatever zombie-related actual news stories we can find, for the purpose of determining whether the Zombie Apocalypse is upon us.

- A man who beheaded and cannibalised a fellow passenger on a bus in Canada has won his bid to leave the grounds of the mental hospital where he is being kept.

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Bus-cannibal-wins-right-to-leave-hospital-20120518

- Russian police have arrested a man who has admitted to killing at least six people before eating their hearts and livers

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Russian-cannibal-serial-killer-confesses-20120327

- A Dutch broadcaster has said it will air a segment in which two presenters engage in cannibalism by eating a small chunk of one another's fried flesh.

http://www.channel24.co.za/TV/News/Dutch-broadcaster-to-air-cannibalism-20111220

- A German man is feared to have been eaten by cannibals on a South Sea island

http://www.news24.com/World/News/German-feared-to-have-been-eaten-20111017

- A 26-year-old German man dubbed the cannibal killer after he confessed to eating the flesh and drinking the blood of one of his victims has been sentenced to life in prison.

http://www.news24.com/World/News/German-cannibal-jailed-for-life-20110627

- A mentally ill New Zealand man who cut off and ate his own finger in a rare case of self-cannibalism has described his action as a cry for help but "ultimately, a very stupid idea". :D

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Eating-finger-was-cry-for-help-says-man-20110504

- A French prisoner dubbed "Hannibal Lecter" has been sentenced to serve another 30 years in prison for killing his cellmate and devouring his lung with fried onions.

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Single-cell-for-cannibals-next-30yrs-20100624

- Man 'stabs himself and throws intestines at police'

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2151830/Man-stabs-throws-intestines-police.html

- Porn actor suspect in body parts case

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Porn-actor-suspect-in-body-parts-case-20120531

- Man killed while eating another man's face

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Man-killed-while-eating-another-mans-face-20120528

- Months of treatment for face-chewing victim

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Months-of-treatment-for-face-chewing-victim-20120531

- Doctor jailed for genital mutilation

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Doctor-jailed-for-genital-mutilation-20110701

- Pathologist: Genitals may have been removed

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/Pathologist-Genitals-may-have-been-removed-20110413

- Man tries to sell wife's head, genitals

http://www.news24.com/Africa/News/Man-tries-to-sell-wifes-head-genitals-20110319

- Genital-butchering doctor convicted

http://www.news24.com/World/News/Genital-butchering-doctor-convicted-20110310

- A Swedish professor who believed his young wife to be having an affair allegedly cut off her lips in a fit of jealousy and ate them

http://news.iafrica.com/worldnews/797656.html
 
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You do know that Zombies are fictitional characters right?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zombie
Africa
West

According to the tenets of Vodou, a dead person can be revived by a bokor, or sorcerer. Zombies remain under the control of the bokor since they have no will of their own. "Zombi" is also another name of the Vodou snake lwa Damballah Wedo, of Niger–Congo origin; it is akin to the Kikongo word nzambi, which means "god". There also exists within the West African Vodun tradition the zombi astral, which is a part of the human soul that is captured by a bokor and used to enhance the bokor's power. The zombi astral is typically kept inside a bottle which the bokor can sell to clients for luck, healing or business success. It is believed that after a time God will take the soul back and so the zombi is a temporary spiritual entity.[3] It is also said in vodou legend, that feeding a zombie salt will make it return to the grave.
South

The idea of zombies is present in some South African cultures. In some communities it is believed that a dead person can be turned into a zombie by a small child.[4] It is said that the spell can be broken by a powerful enough sangoma.[5]

It is also believed in some areas that witches can turn a person into a zombie by killing and possessing the victim's body in order to force it into slave labor.[6] After rail lines were built to transport migrant workers, stories emerged about "witch trains". These trains appeared ordinary, but were staffed by zombie workers controlled by a witch. The trains would abduct a person boarding at night, and the person would then either be turned into a zombie worker, or beaten and thrown from the train a distance away from the original location.[6]

Haiti

In 1937, while researching folklore in Haiti, Zora Neale Hurston encountered the case of a woman who appeared in a village, and a family claimed she was Felicia Felix-Mentor, a relative who had died and been buried in 1907 at the age of 29. Hurston pursued rumors that the affected persons were given a powerful psychoactive drug, but she was unable to locate individuals willing to offer much information. She wrote:

What is more, if science ever gets to the bottom of Voodoo in Haiti and Africa, it will be found that some important medical secrets, still unknown to medical science, give it its power, rather than gestures of ceremony.[7]

Several decades later, Wade Davis, a Harvard ethnobotanist, presented a pharmacological case for zombies in two books, The Serpent and the Rainbow (1985) and Passage of Darkness: The Ethnobiology of the Haitian Zombie (1988). Davis traveled to Haiti in 1982 and, as a result of his investigations, claimed that a living person can be turned into a zombie by two special powders being introduced into the blood stream (usually via a wound). The first, coup de poudre (French: "powder strike"), includes tetrodotoxin (TTX), a powerful and frequently fatal neurotoxin found in the flesh of the pufferfish (order Tetraodontidae). The second powder consists of dissociative drugs such as datura. Together, these powders were said to induce a death-like state in which the will of the victim would be entirely subjected to that of the bokor.
 
http://www.cracked.com/article_15643_5-scientific-reasons-zombie-apocalypse-could-actually-happen.html

We found out recently that if you try to leave a little kid in a graveyard late at night, he'll freak out. Even if you offer to leave him a gun to protect himself. Why? It's because on some instinctual level, all humans know it's just a matter of time until the zombies show up.

Our culture is full of tales of the undead walking the Earth, from our religions to our comic books. But, some sort of zombie apocalypse isn't actually possible, right?

Right?

Guys?

Actually, yes. It's quite possible. Here's five ways it could happen, according to science.

Read more: 5 Scientific Reasons a Zombie Apocalypse Could Actually Happen | Cracked.com http://www.cracked.com/article_1564...ypse-could-actually-happen.html#ixzz1wRqSUWZi
 
If only - as long as I'm not one of them - I wouldn't mind.. no more work :p
 
Waiting for someone to post proof of actual existence of Zombies. And no, living people under the influence of drugs do not count.
 
The only weapon we need is being able to run faster than SA cops, military personnel or anc politicians, ok, ok some DA ones too and that wont be hard at all, remember choose a route past a KFC :)
 
We're safe in SA.

When the kark hits the fan just retreat to your gated complex with its 12ft high, razer wire-tipped walls and close the gate. At all times make sure to have at least one person manning the bullet-proof windowed guard house and Bob's your mother's brother. When the cops sleeping at their desks get overrun at the cop shop, we'll be able to make some ninja runs to get needed weapons. Electricity is a problem but we've had practice with load shedding. Lots of gennies around and about. Sorted. The world will one day be our playground!
 
We're safe in SA.

When the kark hits the fan just retreat to your gated complex with its 12ft high, razer wire-tipped walls and close the gate. At all times make sure to have at least one person manning the bullet-proof windowed guard house and Bob's your mother's brother. When the cops sleeping at their desks get overrun at the cop shop, we'll be able to make some ninja runs to get needed weapons. Electricity is a problem but we've had practice with load shedding. Lots of gennies around and about. Sorted. The world will one day be our playground!

Brings up a new scenario. What if, when locked up in your house, you run out of food and you can't go outside? Will you start eating the other people locked up with you?
 
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Damn the anc ministers will be safe :(
 
Brings up a new scenario. What if, when locked up in your house, you run out of food and you can't go outside? Will you start eating the other people locked up with you?

That's what those weapon runs will cover. 12 gauge SAPS shotties will work fine to provide the people of the tuscan enclaves with enough pidgeon potjie to last a lifetime. Wouldn't hurt to start up a li'l veggie garden now and maybe some herbs on the ol' kitchen window sill. :p
 
Re: the face-eating incident. Read somewhere that some weird **** has been going down this week in Florida. Seems they had a few HazMat cases earlier in the week at schools that caused strange rashes, which may be linked to other incidents including a man biting off his relatives nose, a man spitting his own blood all over police after being pulled over for DUI, and of course, Face Guy. This didn't just happen in the same state, it happened in the same county.

Hi 2 u, T-Virus?!
 
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