Ockie
Resident Lead Bender
Fingers and tongue are the two ingredients in achieving the best bottoming experience.
And definitely as you say, slow and gentle.
Ja....rimming is great....receiving or giving....but I have to admit .... the first time that was done to me (the guy kind of caught me off guard as he did not tell me what he was gonna do) I was "grilling" so much I could hardly stand it. But once I realized he was loving doing it....I relaxed and went with it and then it became very nice actually.
I think some of us, like me have issues with other people going down there. We get very self conscious because I guess as kids we are taught that is a bad bad and filthy area and you must be ashamed of it. Other people I think are much more comfortable with that area.