Was I in the wrong?

It kind of depends how it was told you. Just telling the fact that a woman was raped by a taxi driver isn't gossiping in itself. Getting into the salacious details of it as though it's fodder for tabloid magazines however, is. If you feel she overstepped then she probably did.
 
She was talking about something that happened in real life which is not gossip. You over-reacted and owe her an apology.
 
Wow, if I ever run into the OP somewhere I'll make sure I never open my mouth. I'm sure talking near you will be forbidden in no time too.
 
She could have started the story and finished it within 30 seconds, but decided to spew every little detail because her life is so dull that she needs to resort to this sort of thing to gain attention.Its called being tactful.Well done OP.
 
^^vampire^^ said:
Wow, if I ever run into the OP somewhere I'll make sure I never open my mouth. I'm sure talking near you will be forbidden in no time too.
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Lets put this in context.

You're with a group of friends, who all know each other and live in the same area.

A friend that you ALL know but isn't with you at the time, starts being spoken about and one person starts going on about her being raped etc etc, and your friend has chosen to tell nobody about the incident for whatever reason.

Would you be ok with that situation and not feel MASSIVELY uncomfortable?
 
Slootvreter said:
So it seems that one should NEVER talk about things that happened to someone else?
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Well, a little tact and sensitivity, as well as respect for privacy, certainly would have been a good idea. She could well have told the story without giving enough detail to allow the victim to be identified. A rape victim is violated in a very personal sense, and normally feels deeply shamed by the crime. By telling the story you're effectively increasing that sense of shame, should the victim get to know that the story spread. If you can't understand the need for sensitivity and privacy in this matter, at least try to respect it.
 
Just cos you got offended, doesn't make you right.

I would have walked away.
 
Tacet said:
Well, a little tact and sensitivity, as well as respect for privacy, certainly would have been a good idea. She could well have told the story without giving enough detail to allow the victim to be identified. A rape victim is violated in a very personal sense, and normally feels deeply shamed by the crime. By telling the story you're effectively increasing that sense of shame, should the victim get to know that the story spread. If you can't understand the need for sensitivity and privacy in this matter, at least try to respect it.
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I just really don't think it's that bad, and clearly, that's just me. ;)
 
Slootvreter said:
I just really don't think it's that bad, and clearly, that's just me. ;)
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Yep - and chances are that you're emotionally strong enough that the gossiping wouldn't have bothered you if you were the victim. But for the sake of those a bit more vulnerable, it's better to allow them to tell who they want to.
 
Tacet said:
Yep - and chances are that you're emotionally strong enough that the gossiping wouldn't have bothered you if you were the victim. But for the sake of those a bit more vulnerable, it's better to allow them to tell who they want to.
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Yeah I tend to shrug off things that other people consider extremely embarrassing or personal, and I don't consider myself overly touchy as well, but I am still aware of what other people find upsetting or offensive and won't go out of my way to piss them off. But if it was me, I'd just have listened to the story, the same as if she was in a car accident.
 
Rocket Raccoon said:
This has been bothering since Friday night. I went out with a few friends for drinks and we were joined by an acquaintance, a woman who lives in my parents' street. So we all talked about a lot of things and the subject was changed to taxis and then this lady suddenly told us about this one girl in her street that was raped by two men who were driving around as a taxi driver and a passenger. She was telling us all the details and I snapped at her for telling us this because I feel she had no right to use this as gossip material. And believe me she is one huge gossip. Got into an argument about it and she then left.

I'm not one to put my head in the sand when it comes to these issues but the way she brought up the subject was like, "Speaking of taxis, did you hear X was raped two weeks ago by taxi drivers".

F***, you can't talk about something like that as if it's juicy little secret you can't keep to yourself.
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You story goes from this one girl, which is a generalized way to refer to someone who could be anyone, to X. So was the victim identified in the story or not? What was the context of the story? Was she telling it in order to make others aware of the dangers of the taxis in that area or was she outright pointing out the victim? If she was identifying the victim as it sounds to me, then I believe you were in the right.
 
Appreciate the response. I admit I can act like a diva sometimes. :o

Bobbin said:
Was she telling it in order to make others aware of the dangers of the taxis in that area or was she outright pointing out the victim? If she was identifying the victim as it sounds to me, then I believe you were in the right.
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It was both. She was very specific about her.

I managed to find the story on the local newspaper's site. Turns out these guys abducted two women that night.
 
Rocket Raccoon said:
Appreciate the response. I admit I can act like a diva sometimes. :o



It was both. She was very specific about her.

I managed to find the story on the local newspaper's site. Turns out these guys abducted two women that night.
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Well if its a local crime it is definitely something to be aware of...but maybe gossip girl went about it in the wrong tone. I would have then steered the gossip in a sympathetic direction, not freak out. If its in the paper then you have loads of people talking openly about it now.
 
Cant believe no one has mentioned but without PICS I am unable to say if your reaction was valid or not.

Seems the other MYBB are going a bit soft
 
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