Water!

[Goobie]

you know what source of water the op is using and have done extensive testing on it using an independent third party with audited results?
i think you may have forgotten to mention the biggest killer of all... flourine /sarcasm
do you work for a water filter company by any chance?

no I don't work for a filter company.

I test water for a living.

The OP said he drinks tap water. What part is not clear about that?

 

[fastesthamster]

The only reason why you'd retain water is if you're dehydrated. Coffee/alcohol dehydrates you. Soft drinks (read: Coke) also contains high amounts of caffeine, dehydrating you even further (causing water retention)

The only way to counter-act that is by drinking water and cutting out coffee/soft drinks. However not everyone can/will/would want to. So as a rule, for every cup of coffee, drink 3 glasses of water.

That's rubbish. Coffee does not dehydrate you. You cannot die of dehydration if you drink only coffee. It's just that drinking a cup of coffee is not equivalent to one cup of water, it's equivalent to less water.

 

[The Voice]

The OP said he drinks tap water.

GAUTENG tap water, to be exact. So I probably get a few extra minerals from the mine dumps!