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It's a joke ou, not a díck, don't take it so hardI realised it was a joke, just a very poor one. I know it’s not fashionable to stay on topic on an internet forum though. So guess it’d my mistake for asking a semi serious question here and expecting semi serious answers
Tldr.
Lemon trees take 7 yrs to fruit
Also, add epsom salts
Good to know.
Grew one from a seed from a lemon off a tree next door.
Neighbors Lemon tree overhangs in our driveway, and we pick from there every year.
Decided to try to grow one, and it's up to about 30cm now (about a year old).
You laugh ...Fertilise them by taking a dump under the lemon tree