Hello, is anybody listening?

Typical problems...

Solving one’s Telkom problems is a bit like calling a joke line staffed by the people who used to work for Monty Python and waiting for the next lame-arsed excuse about why your phone line or broadband connection has gone down
Click to expand...

...bad analogy, try using some Python-esque references if you're trying to make a point :rolleyes:
 
You know. This is getting pretty ridiculous... Surely our president, who claims to be putting his foot down, and blah di blah di blah...

C'mon man. We are all fed-up with the Broadband in this country.
Just ban Telkom. Give all their infrastructure to proper ADSL companies equally and let companies that actually want to give the users good service, good quality, good prices handle ADSL in South Africa.

This is absolutely gone too far. We don't want Telkom anymore. For flip sakes
 
- I'd like to buy some ADSL please.

- What? none at all?

- How about a little piece of Wimax?

- Not that either? Oh.

- This is a Telkom shop isn't it?

- No I don't want a parrot...

---
Or perhaps:

- When I were a lad we only had dial up.

- Dial up, you were lucky. We only 'ad wet string.

- Wet string, wet string, you were lucky....
 
Nice 1...

Operator: Telkom Internet. How may I help you?
Customer: Hi, My friends suggested I get ADSL.
Operator: Huh?
Customer: Asynchronous Digital Subscriber Line
Operator: Cell phone?
Customer: Its so that I can go on the Internet
Operator: Oh yea! Do Broadband
Customer: No, I'm gonna use my own provider
Operator: What do you need me for?
Customer: I need to buy the line?
Operator: The ADSL line?
Customer: Yes.
Operator: What's your telephone number?
Customer: 743 5436
Operator: Done.
Customer: What?
Operator: Oh wait. It says you have to pay. I'm gonna undo it.
Customer: I want to pay.
Operator: You will have to wait 24 hours. I've already undone it. Must I place a request for you?
Customer: Yes. 384 Kb line
Operator: What?
Customer: Thats the line speed I want.
Operator: For what?
Customer:THE ADSL LINE !!!
Operator: Oh. The 1Gig or 2 Gig package?
Customer: ~Click~
 
XCentricdave said:
- When I were a lad we only had dial up.

- Dial up, you were lucky. We only 'ad wet string.

- Wet string, wet string, you were lucky....
Click to expand...

Lookshury!

When I were a lad we had to walk 100 miles to neighbour, trailing a roll of dry string behind us. When we got there, we had to crawl all the way back, licking the string as we went so me da could talk to neighbour. Mind you, it didn't last long, not when those bloody lumberjacks kept cutting the string ...
 
When I called to say the much- televised Closer bundle cost me as much as before I took it, and when my bandwidth spiked by 5Gb over a weekend, I was told a variety of falsehoods and was essentially told it was my fault — only to have Telkom refund me R3600-ish for clip-on fraud.
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:eek: :confused: there is clip-on ADSL fraud now, or was the Telkodemonopolies-supplied router hacked?
If only MTN would buy Telkom, as the market rumours keep suggesting, it may become a decent company.
Click to expand...
Not unless MTN fires all Telkodemonopolies employees - they are beyond redemption and have permanent brain-damage|brain-deadness after many years of repeated brainwashing and believe the lies that they tell customers.
 
It will not stop until the gravy train derails.
 
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