Another emo thread... Advice, please...

thesadguy

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My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 7 years. As per usual, things were great in the beginning, and slowly declined. For the last 2 years, looking back, things have been horrible. We're both far too busy for each other.

About a month back, I started making plans to end it. I have been looking for the best way to word it. During my quest for words, I have met someone and we have really hit it off. The new girl knows the complete situation (she knew it before we even hit it off).

Now I feel extremely guilty, and it makes the breakup even worse. How can I break things off without it seeming like it's due to the new girl?
 
Be a man and end it as soon as possible, face to face. Have you cheated with this new girl?
 
And you planned this in Nov 2008?!

images
 
If it's over then end it you are being unfair to all 3 of you.

& you are not respecting either of the 2 ladies with your current actions.
 
Oh yes, you are an arse for getting involved with someone, even though your current relationship was not going well.
 
Oh yes, you are an arse for getting involved with someone, even though your current relationship was not going well.

Yep. It's fairly amusing, "We've been together for seven years, two of which have been horrible because we don't have enough time for each other so instead of trying to solve the problem and work on fixing our relationship I've decided that the five good years aren't worth it but I've met someone else whom I just happen to have time for, so I'd like to end it."

****.

Tell her you're a low-life with no integrity and that you've been seeing someone on the side. She'll be better for it and will eventually find someone with a pair of balls.
 
Have to agree with all comments here.

End it.

How pathetic is that you are cheating on your girlfriend of 7 years. The least you owe after such a long time is honesty. She has obviously put alot in the relationship and it's not fair on her to be cheated on.

Be a man for once
 
Have not cheated. Don't plan to.

Looking back, things have been horrible. At the time, it seemed bearable. We worked through issues. Or so we thought.

Again, met new girl AFTER deciding to break things off.
 
Have not cheated. Don't plan to.

Looking back, things have been horrible. At the time, it seemed bearable. We worked through issues. Or so we thought.

Again, met new girl AFTER deciding to break things off.
but you have not ended things yet and you already have someone lined up?
 
If there's someone else then the only fair thing to do is end it as soon as possible. Have some morals man.
 
Oh, and the question is not "what should I do?", but rather "how should I do it?".

I'm not looking for the easy way out, I want the best outcome for HER.
 
Be a man and end it as soon as possible, face to face.

The longer you put it off the worse it will be for your soon-to-be-ex.

No point in procrastinating. You never know that her feelings won't be mutual. So what if it gets a wee bit ugly.

You owe it to her, being honest and open, for the 7 years you had together.

Just a question though... if you were too busy for each other, how could you find time for the new lass? is this not just another recipe for disaster?
 
Oh, and the question is not "what should I do?", but rather "how should I do it?".

I'm not looking for the easy way out, I want the best outcome for HER.

Do it now. Be honest and be yourself. The words are not as important as the sincerity.
 
Once again, not looking for WHAT to do... That has been decided... Looking for the best way to do it, without hurting her.

"Hey, sorry, I changed my mind" doesn't quite work.

@ McT:
Thanks for the advice.
I agree with you; it could be a recipe for disaster... Food for thought, certainly; hadn't considered that.
And about words being not as important as the sincerity... Fair enough. But maybe it's possible to get both?
 
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