Another thread from the swamp...

The_Ogre

The_Ogre

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This is more for opinionated advice, rather than anything legal.

So I was together with someone quite a few years ago and she'd reared from the ashes (well, sort of).

Her daughter, whom she accused me of being the sperm donor of, and, which a paternity test subsequently proved was not the case, sent me a message on FB to confront me for being absent from her life. She's 12.

I'm conflicted because I don't want to tell her the truth and her mother asked me to keep the secret with the positive caveat that she (mother) only wants me to play a father figure role in terms of having the kid have someone to turn to since the **** who fathered her wants nothing to do with her, other than the financial obligations.

Long story short, I was involved with her mother, she got knocked up during a period where we were apart and since she wasn't 100% sure if I was the father, we went for a paternity test.

I raised her for a year before my own mother told me to rather do the test, after which I decided to cut ties with the mother...and the kid.

The message she sent cut through me like a hot knife: "Daddy, do you not want me to be your child?"
 
The_Ogre said:
The message she sent cut through me like a hot knife: "Daddy, do you not want me to be your child?"
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Are you sure the mother didn't set her up to send that message. It sounds incredibly manipulative.

I know I'm a bit of a cynic, but I've watched Dr Phil, man ... : whistle:
 
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The_Ogre said:
Her daughter, whom she accused me of being the sperm donor of, and, which a paternity test subsequently proved was not the case, sent me a message on FB to confront me for being absent from her life. She's 12.


The message she sent cut through me like a hot knife: "Daddy, do you not want me to be your child?"
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You think the daughter sent this or the mother sent it via the daughter? Either way though, I think you need to speak to little girl in person if possible and tell her you're not her Dad. It's gonna hurt her, but probably not as much as really thinking you're her dad and you don't care about her. At least be the person in her life who's honest, her mom clearly isn't playing that role.
 
saor said:
You think the daughter sent this or the mother sent it via the daughter? Either way though, I think you need to speak to little girl in person if possible and tell her you're not her Dad. It's gonna hurt her, but probably not as much as really thinking you're her dad and you don't care about her. At least be the person in her life who's honest, her mom clearly isn't playing that role.
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You REALLY think this thing will play the fake father role? Did he play the real father role with the kids under his own supervision for 14 years?
 
RedViking said:
How do you even think up all these stuff?

The uber driver stories are better.

I rate this 3/10.
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You reckon I make the **** up that I post on here? I stated before there are a bunch of guys on here who know me personally and know how I am with luck or the lack thereof

1630948098891.png

I hope you can let her grammar slide.
 
How do you expect someone who is just finding herself as a person to do so on lies?
Sit her down, tell her the truth and tell her it will be ok.
 
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The_Mowgs said:
You REALLY think this thing will play the fake father role? Did he play the real father role with the kids under his own supervision for 14 years?
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OP seems to treat a lot of stuff like it's a big joke. But that's just me interpreting forum posts. I'm just taking a chance here that they're genuinely asking for advice as it's one thing to joke about your own shit, another to joke about the life/happiness/wellbeing etc. of a little girl who thinks you're her dad (for whatever reason).
 
now05ster said:
Are you sure the mother didn't set her up to send that message. It sounds incredible manipulative.

I know I'm a bit of a cynic, but I've watched Dr Phil, man ... : whistle:
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I cannot confirm that with any conviction because the messages sent are juvenile.
 
saor said:
OP seems to treat a lot of stuff like it's a big joke. But that's just me interpreting forum posts. Just taking a chance here that they're genuinely asking for advice as it's one thing to joke about your own ****, another to joke about the life of a little girl.
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You mean a guy who will put an uber driver above his family, beer above his kids, and think he is good to his family with a restraining order against him bragging on the Internet cares what he says about a 12 year old kid?

If any of these made up stories are true, who ever knows him needs to get him to a psychologist.

Also, report the situation to family or social workers so the kid can get the help she needs.
 
The_Ogre said:
I cannot confirm that with any conviction because the messages sent are juvenile.
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How tf can you not see that it was the mom who sent that? Those spelling mistakes are done on purpose to make it look like a child wrote it.

Heres an idea, go with it and let us know how long it takes for little alyssa to ask for pocket money
 
Did SA ever have a Jerry Springer/Maury Povich equivalent? Sounds like you should go for that.
 
saor said:
OP seems to treat a lot of stuff like it's a big joke. But that's just me interpreting forum posts. I'm just taking a chance here that they're genuinely asking for advice as it's one thing to joke about your own shit, another to joke about the life/happiness/wellbeing etc. of a little girl who thinks you're her dad (for whatever reason).
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That retard is the one who's taking life as a big joke. He's one of the guys who knows all kinds of kak happen to me. Case in point, he once told me to replace my engine because my wife drove the car without oil gearbox oil and he will lend me the money at 30% interest. Thank god I didn't fall for his bullschit :thumbsup:
 
The_Ogre said:
That retard is the one who's taking life as a big joke. He's one of the guys who knows all kinds of kak happen to me. Case in point, he once told me to replace my engine because my wife drove the car without oil gearbox oil and he will lend me the money at 30% interest. Thank god I didn't fall for his bullschit
Click to expand...
Remember to tell the rest also
 
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