Bad Habit

Not looking someone in the eye when you talk creates the impression that you are a shifty character. Try to break it ASAP.
 
I can't look people in the eye for too long or I might end up kissing them. :twisted:
 
Haldex said:
I have a bad habit of not looking at people "in the eye" when speaking to them.
Apparently I do this to everyone, friends, colleagues, girls, boys, old people etc

its very bad from what ive heard, people tend to think im snobbish or depressed or hiding something and whatever else they think.

I never noticed it before.

Any way I can fix it?
Is it serious or not?
Click to expand...

Make a point of looking people in the eyes when you talk to them.
Fake it until you make it. It will become quite natural after a few days.

Check your posture too, normally the looking down comes with slouching and slumping of the shoulders.
When walking, swing your arms far enough to have your hands just slightly pass your ass.
This automatically pulls the shoulders back and forces the back into an upright posture and lengthen's your stride - instant confidence.

Dont fidget with your hands when talking to someone...looks shifty.
At first I suggest that you carry a pen with you.
This will keep you conscious of what your hands are holding and if you fidget with a pen, it comes across as "thinking".

It is easier to fake the physical confidence than the mental confidence issues.
Doing the former normally helps with the latter.
 
@ Humans post

strutting_leo.jpg
 
Human said:
At first I suggest that you carry a pen with you.
This will keep you conscious of what your hands are holding and if you fidget with a pen, it comes across as "thinking".
Click to expand...

Sneaky :D
 
czc said:
Sneaky :D
Click to expand...

The pen thing works incredibly well.
Especially for public speaking.
It keeps you focused when you are nervous and makes you look "prepared" and "intelligent".

Confidence is about trickery. Nothing else.
 
Well, are you depressed/snobbish/whatever they think? If not don't worry about it.

I never normally look people in the eye either (apparently), but not because I'm depressed or shifty or whatever, more because people get very weird when I do, like taking everything I say to them as an insult/challenge, even the simplest questions. Must have something to do with those "emotion" thingies I hear about so much. I prefer being quietly judged to being confrontational all the time.

Point is, there can be many reasons, but if there is an underlying cause like you mentioned, be it self-confidence or whatever, probably best to work on that, the "habit"is just the symptom.
 
Human said:
Make a point of looking people in the eyes when you talk to them.
Fake it until you make it. It will become quite natural after a few days.

Check your posture too, normally the looking down comes with slouching and slumping of the shoulders.
When walking, swing your arms far enough to have your hands just slightly pass your ass.
This automatically pulls the shoulders back and forces the back into an upright posture and lengthen's your stride - instant confidence.

Dont fidget with your hands when talking to someone...looks shifty.
At first I suggest that you carry a pen with you.
This will keep you conscious of what your hands are holding and if you fidget with a pen, it comes across as "thinking".

It is easier to fake the physical confidence than the mental confidence issues.
Doing the former normally helps with the latter.
Click to expand...

haha, cool tips, thanks.
 
I must be honest, people who don't look at me when they are talking to you freak the hell out of me.
 
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