Dating a vegetarian

BCO said:
Well, I'd never force her with some kind of ultimatum, but if you spend a lot of time with somebody and you talk openly then it's definitely not impossible to affect or be affected by that person's viewpoints, behaviour etc. I don't think that there's any need for condescension from either party when discussing dietary/lifestyle choices. Practical example - I became vegetarian before my wife did, while we were engaged. Now we're both vegetarian.
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Well, it was similar with my ex. I became a vegetarian amidst his protests, it wasn't too long before he followed suit. Unfortunately his reasons were different from my own and he seemed... embarrassed by it. It annoyed me.

I'm beyond the stage in my life where I want to explain myself, my beliefs or my reasons to my partner. Either they understand and it's mutual or it isn't and there's no point to it. That's just how I feel.

I'm obviously happy to have someone in my life who fulfils those needs :p Just remembering "dating" and sifting through all the ignorant rubbish out there. Thank **** that's history :)
 
If two entities can't co-exist without trying to force each other to change it's not worth it. AFAIK dating vegan's are normally not as complicated as dating someone who is overly religious when you're not. Vegan's are usually chilled out anyway.

However, if you're going to go make with the whoopie and father/mother some children in such a relationship it would be a good idea to talk about these things beforehand. How discipline would be approached as well as the nutrition etc. Preferably before making the kids....open communication and non-judgemental/emotional open-mindedness to other's choices is usually a key factor people ignore. Especially during the "lust" stage of the relationship
 
I forgot to mention that you need to keep in mind that a "couple" is 2 individuals choosing each other's company. You can't expect your partner to change for you and neither can they. You need to be your own individual yet choose to be with someone who doesn't quite follow your own lifestyle IF that is what you want. It's clearly a choice and a conscious one at that.
 
AcidRaZor said:
I forgot to mention that you need to keep in mind that a "couple" is 2 individuals choosing each other's company. You can't expect your partner to change for you and neither can they. You need to be your own individual yet choose to be with someone who doesn't quite follow your own lifestyle IF that is what you want. It's clearly a choice and a conscious one at that.
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I feel both parties can change, But compromise must be met in the middle = win win situation for both.
 
Both parties do not need to change, my ex i was with for 8 years and i never ate meat and she loved ribs, steak etc and i didn't mind. In the beginning watching her have a right go at a rack of ribs freaked me out a bit but i got over it.

We just ate different meals and loads of pasta. it is not about changing the person or eating habits it is about making different meals and not judging what they eat. If your reason for not dating someone is what they eat then you have serious issues.

When we went out to eat i made sure the place could accommodate both of us. We were suppose to eat meat the weird ones are us not the meat eaters. It is a bit tough going to family gatherings but they always made sure they bought stuff i would eat.
 
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killadoob said:
Both parties do not need to change, my ex i was with for 8 years and i never ate meat and she loved ribs, steak etc and i didn't mind. In the beginning see her have a right go at a rack of ribs freaked me out a bit but i got over it.

We just ate different meals and loads of pasta. it is not about changing the person or eating habits it is about making different meals and not judging what they eat. If your reason for not dating someone is what they eat then you have serious issues.
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Evidently personal preference is a "serious issue." Will you now deign yourself supreme overlord of relationships and tell people who they may and may not date and for what reasons based on your individual tolerances? Arrogance.
 
Well one thing I can say from experience is that both parties involved need to feel comfortable with each other as there will be times when they will be eating out together. There is nothing worse that not enjoying your meal when the other half has annoying habits - talking from experience.
 
cbrunsdonza said:
Well one thing I can say from experience is that both parties involved need to feel comfortable with each other as there will be times when they will be eating out together. There is nothing worse that not enjoying your meal when the other half has annoying habits - talking from experience.
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When I think of "annoying eating habits" I think of, "Arrgh no! It has olives! I hate olives!" and watching someone surgically separate them from the rest of the food. I can't stand that >.<'
 
Being a vegetarian should be the last hindrance in a relationship. Its a lifestyle choice and an extremely healthy option for that matter.

Being sensitive to each others needs and communication is more important than whats cooking for dinner.
 
SinghDude said:
Being a vegetarian should be the last hindrance in a relationship. Its a lifestyle choice and an extremely healthy option for that matter.

Being sensitive to each others needs and communication is more important than whats cooking for dinner.
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What if what's cooking for dinner is important to one's needs in a relationship? :)

If you are someone who can't tolerate cruelty to animals, and the idea of animals being killed for food grates you, how could you be in a relationship with someone who treats that issue in a nonchalant manner? Personally, it's something I need reciprocated in a relationship. A relationship based on significant philosophical differences is doomed to fail, however much you like to dress it up.
 
Lycanthrope said:
Evidently personal preference is a "serious issue." Will you now deign yourself supreme overlord of relationships and tell people who they may and may not date and for what reasons based on your individual tolerances? Arrogance.
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Getting a bit defensive hey? So if you meet someone amazing and find out they like meat then it's over? Tolerance should be something you are very sensitive to.

It is far from arrogant for me to think if i met someone totally amazing that i would not turn them away because they don't eat what i do, if anything you are the arrogant one and considering your choices in life tolerance is something you should understand more than most people. Meat racism hahahah.

I never said who you should or should not date i just said what they eat should not determine their worth to you. I would imagine since you cannot tolerate meat eaters the first question you ask is about their eating habits?

So hi do you eat meat? I thought i would just get it out the way before i find out are a totally amazing person who i could spend plenty time with but if you eat meat i just cannot handle it. Tolerance much? Arrogance much? Perhaps when the church turns gay people away they are not showing tolerance because essentially what you are doing is the exact same thing which strikes me as odd.
 
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killadoob said:
Getting a bit defensive hey? So if you meet someone amazing and find out they like meat then it's over? Tolerance should be something you are very sensitive to.

It is far from arrogant for me to think if i met someone totally amazing that i would turn them away because they don't eat what i do, if anything you are arrogant one and considering your choices in life tolerance is something you should understand more than most people. Meat racism hahahah.

I never said who you should or should not date i just said what they eat should not determine their worth to you.
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If someone eats meat, they're not "amazing" in any way shape or form to me and there is no chance of me stepping foot into a relationship with them.

I'm becoming defensive because you became offensive ;) You claimed that I must have "serious issues" if someone's eating habits is a reason for me not to date them. I'd like to know what those issues are, especially if in saying that, you display your own disregard for other people's personal preferences and expectations in a relationship and therefore, no tolerance to the decisions, choices and preferences of others to the point of being condescendingly arrogant.

I wouldn't date a fat person, a smoker, a drunk or slut, why should I date a meat-eater if it conflicts with my personal philosophies?
 
I am just wondering how you go about meeting someone special when their eating habits are critical. Do you bring it up in the very early stages?

If you go out meet such an awesome person do you know on that day if they eat meat? Do you let them know you cannot tolerate meat eaters? Cannot wait to hear how you go about it :D.

What about friends, are you friends with people who eat meat?

So it would be fair to say that churches should be able to have their own personal choices as to who they think should be allowed to go to their church? If someone dislikes gay people because of their personal preferences then that is also fine?
 
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killadoob said:
I am just wondering how you go about meeting someone special when their eating habits are critical. Do you bring it up in the very early stages?

If you go out meet such an awesome person do you know on that day if they eat meat? Do you let them know you cannot tolerate meat eaters? Cannot wait to hear how you go about it :D.
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Well, I've never really jumped into relationships. Generally it starts as friendship first and progresses from there. I have some black-and-white criteria that needs to be met in a relationship--vegetarianism being one of them. It's all personal preferences. Like I said, I will never date a smoker, someone who drinks excessively, someone who sleeps around or someone who eats meat. It conflicts with my personality and what makes me feel "happy" or "content" in a relationship and what I want in the long-term.

What about friends, are you friends with people who eat meat?
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Lycanthrope said:
I have non-vegetarian friends, but I would never have a non-vegetarian partner :p
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As I said, I don't have a problem being friends with non-vegetarians--other people's lifestyles and choices don't really bug me. It only bugs me when it's in my own private space and comfort-zone, so I'd never let it get that far :)

There are people who feel differently about it than me, sure. I'm just saying that this is how it is for me.

Oh, and I'd also never date a non-gamer again :D There's something awfully romantic about playing games together <3
 
Fair enough but i still think finding a non gaming veggie is not the easiest task in the world :D. So you are limiting the possibility of finding someone special. Perhaps you don't have serious issues you just want what you want but wow no drunks, no people who sleep around, no meat eaters and must be a gamer :D.

Holy cow needle in a hay stack hahah but fair enough, i can see how saying someone has serious issues was a bit much :D.
 
Lycanthrope said:
What if what's cooking for dinner is important to one's needs in a relationship? :)

If you are someone who can't tolerate cruelty to animals, and the idea of animals being killed for food grates you, how could you be in a relationship with someone who treats that issue in a nonchalant manner? Personally, it's something I need reciprocated in a relationship. A relationship based on significant philosophical differences is doomed to fail, however much you like to dress it up.
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...That's why I got me a vegt gal
 
killadoob said:
Fair enough but i still think finding a non gaming veggie is not the easiest task in the world :D. So you are limiting the possibility of finding someone special. Perhaps you don't have serious issues you just want what you want but wow no drunks, no people who sleep around, no meat eaters and must be a gamer :D.

Holy cow needle in a hay stack hahah but fair enough, i can see how saying someone has serious issues was a bit much :D.
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Well, I've been in a relationship with my current partner for a year and two months and so far no complaints :p

We were friends for about two years before we ended up in a relationship. He wasn't a vegetarian at the time but felt the same way about it all as I did so it wasn't long until he converted. It was something he wanted to do so it meant a lot to me.

It's difficult finding someone who matches your expectations, to actually find someone who exceeds them, that's pretty awesome :love:
 
BCO said:
I wouldn't NOT date someone because she ate meat. I would hope that if we were together for any length of time that I could convince her to kick the habit though.
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You make it sound like a smoking habit she will need to give up. It ain't that easy for everyone. I don't eat any veg (well, I can count the fruit & veg that I do eat on one hand). Live off meat and starch


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