Divorce

[Purply]

So the wife finally decided to file for divorce, which is probably for the best.

Now the lawyers want me to go in and sign the documents etc etc.

As I"m self employed it's next to impossible to leave work during work hours, something they don't seem to understand.

I remember when my brother got divorced about 2 years ago they came and dropped off all the documents for him to sign at our place of work.

My question is, can they force you do go and sign the documents, or will they finally see the light and just drop it off at my place of work as I requested?

 

[Hemi300c]

They need to give you a copy so that you can peruse and check at your leisure before signing. They cannot force you into a meeting and expect you to walk out having signed your life away.

PS NEVER NEVER put any amount except the word NONE in the space for maintenance for her.
R0.00 can get increased
None - Cannot.

Good luck and be strong and don't take k@k as it could affect you in the years to come. Divorce is never nice and nice guys/girls only lose.

 

[bwana]

Whose lawyers? Her lawyers should be dealing with yours, not directly with you.

 

[ShaunSA]

On the bright side... your name's not Zhou

 

[Fuma]

My ex-wife and I didn't involve lawyers at all. Less than R200 later, everything was sorted.

 

[Purply]

Already got the documents emailed to me for perusal and everything is fine.

Her lawyer is also my lawyer lol, but she's the one that's filed for divorce, so don't see the need for me having one.

We already agreed on everything, just the signing of the final documents that needs to be done.

 

[Fuma]

Do you have kids with this woman? How many and how old?

 

[Purply]

None

 

[Fuma]

None

Be glad. If she won custody of the kids, you never know what she would do.

 

[Other Pineapple Smurf]

Sorry to hear about, its never a nice thing to go through no matter what your situation is. Gets tougher before it gets better, I hope never to go through a divorce again.

I would go with the advice that they need to come to you. Take your time reading the documents and re-read them three times before you sign anything. Lawyers know its an emotional rollecoaster and will take advantage of the situation.

I agree with the advice on zero maintenance. Only the courts should be allowed to decide on the amount, never lawyers.

All the best.

 

[blunomore]

I agree with the advice on zero maintenance. Only the courts should be allowed to decide on the amount, never lawyers.

As a matter of fact, it is better if the parties agree on the contents of the settlement, so that it can then simply be made an order of court.

If the court must decide this, it takes longer, because they need proof of your financial situation, expenses, etc etc.

 

[ponder]

Her lawyer is also my lawyer lol, but she's the one that's filed for divorce, so don't see the need for me having one.

Conflict of interest?

 

[Purply]

So basically it's within my right to ask them to bring to documents to me, rather than me having to go in and sign?

I mean, we paying them for a service,the least they can do it deliver the damn documents

 

[AnibugZA]

There's this lovely little thing called a courier.
Send the courier to collect the documents and deliver them to you.
Sign at your leisure.
Send documents back via courier.

If the lawyer insists that you have to sign the documents in their presence for witnessing or legal reasons, then insist that they come to you. Stick to your guns. If you can't go to them, you can't go to them. Maybe you can meet after hours or on the weekend, but they'll charge you an arm and a kidney for that "overtime". I'd vote for the courier route.

 

[F1 Fan]

So basically it's within my right to ask them to bring to documents to me, rather than me having to go in and sign?

I mean, we paying them for a service,the least they can do it deliver the damn documents

I have this same problem with lawyers generally.They don't seem to grasp the concept that during the week, people work. The funniest thing is they not open on Saturdays either.

 

[greg0205]

Sorry to hear the news Purply and my post might be too soon but, having been there myself, I can never help it when the topic comes up so here goes...

Why is divorce so expensive?





'Cos it's worth it.

/I'm out.

 

[Purply]

It's not expensive?

That's not the reason for the post :wtf:

 

[greg0205]

It's not expensive?

That's not the reason for the post :wtf:

Yeah... Too soon.

 

[Other Pineapple Smurf]

As a matter of fact, it is better if the parties agree on the contents of the settlement, so that it can then simply be made an order of court.

If the court must decide this, it takes longer, because they need proof of your financial situation, expenses, etc etc.

I've got a friend who is a family court judge, and another two who are lawyers with experience in divorces. Trust me, when I hear about their recent cases and how the courts ruled, better go to court unless you and your ex are still friends.

I was lucky my ex and I handled our divorce like adults, but that was 12 years ago and the courts & laws have changes a lot.

 

[Other Pineapple Smurf]

....
Her lawyer is also my lawyer lol, but she's the one that's filed for divorce, so don't see the need for me having one.
....

Nothing wrong with that, thats how I got divorced. Was quicker, cheaper and less painful. Better get it over and done with earlier as its natural for resentment to settle in.

Its wonderful if you can agree on how to exit without having to fight with each other. Makes it easier to move on and not hold grudges against each other.

In my case I walked out with R1000 to get back to the Cape, left all the assets for the wife including the business. We worked so hard on building up the business that last thing we wanted was to see it all lost to lawyers fees if we ever tried to fight for it. We are now best friends and have both moved on.