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Question of the Day: Which is the most hair-raising South African mountain pass you've driven?
Downward Spiral...
- Thread starter JK8
- Start date
remybfg10k
Expert Member
My sis was raped and committed suicide. My gran and grandfather died. My uncle (as per my other thread) appears to have committed suicide and I caught ciguatera poisoning as well. My business partner has run off with the profits from the sale of our 2 businesses and I am coming close to broke now as I cant work due to the poisoning and the theft of my money. All over the last year, plus a few other things have happened in betwen like breaking up with my fiance`.
Downward spiral? How you cope with it is by telling yourself that you are not in a downward spiral and tomorrow is another day to change the world. (hippie talk, but it works). As soon as you let it get the better of you is the day that you break. You have to have a strong personality IMO and I am not sure how I do it, but I convince myself that these things will not get the better of me. And I learn and move on. I cannot really explain how or what it is that I do, I just look at what I can take out of each situation from a positive perspective.
I also dont look back on these things like other people do. They try to remember the bad things. I intentionally dont remind myself of these things.
Downward spiral? How you cope with it is by telling yourself that you are not in a downward spiral and tomorrow is another day to change the world. (hippie talk, but it works). As soon as you let it get the better of you is the day that you break. You have to have a strong personality IMO and I am not sure how I do it, but I convince myself that these things will not get the better of me. And I learn and move on. I cannot really explain how or what it is that I do, I just look at what I can take out of each situation from a positive perspective.
I also dont look back on these things like other people do. They try to remember the bad things. I intentionally dont remind myself of these things.
The_Unbeliever
Honorary Master
Geriatrix
Executive Member
Hectic! Some of you guys have had some terrible experiences. My advice is stop thinking about what happened and to stick it out. Things will changes later on. They always do.
guest2013-1
guest
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What helps me is to realise that I'm always in a downward spiral, but that if I am, so are others.
Dude, nobody gets out alive...
Dude, nobody gets out alive...
nocilah
Banned
marine1
Honorary Master
My god !!
Sorry to hear man.
I'm not - that should be the simplest answer to this thread...
Nanfeishen
Executive Member
You have the first step to your answer right there.
Second step , avoid seafood (ciguatera, had to google the damn thing
)Business partners? difficult one, but if you can avoid them in the future i would suggest it, you may not earn as much, doing all the work, maybe you will earn more, but at least you wont get shafted.
Fiance thing, if she walked out on you because things were going bad, (assuming you didnt elaborate), then she wasnt worth it, if a woman cant stand by in the bad times, but only be there for the good, then its best to find someone else.
A bit of a personal question, and if you ignore it i fully understand, is there a history of depression in your family or on one side of your family?
If so, it may bear looking at a little closer.
You have the first step to your answer right there.
Second step , avoid seafood (ciguatera, had to google the damn thing
Business partners? difficult one, but if you can avoid them in the future i would suggest it, you may not earn as much, doing all the work, maybe you will earn more, but at least you wont get shafted.
Fiance thing, if she walked out on you because things were going bad, (assuming you didnt elaborate), then she wasnt worth it, if a woman cant stand by in the bad times, but only be there for the good, then its best to find someone else.
A bit of a personal question, and if you ignore it i fully understand, is there a history of depression in your family or on one side of your family?
If so, it may bear looking at a little closer.
No history of depression. I am far from depressed. As explained in my post, I don't let these things get to me or make me feel down. (Not sure if you might have mis-read, but I didnt ask the question, was JK8)
Fiance` - I broke up with her - but it was still difficult
Business partner - I never ever saw it coming. He was a valued member of the management team - he brought a wealth of expertise and experience. Was necessary at the time.
Ciguatera - clarification - avoid Barracuda...
This is the thing I've learnt in life so far....
When you look back on your life (and as you get older often you do so more frequently) don't remember the terrible things that happened to you, rather remember the good things that made your life memorable.
It's difficult to explain as it differs for every person in the world, but it doesn't really matter what you remember, because inevitably if you carry on with your life, the challenges always seem bigger - sometimes insurmountable, and it's during these times that we as humans shine.
Often the greatest achievements by humans happen in the face of impossible odds. Some of our greatest inventions, our greatest thinkers, our most important discoveries were made when adversity was banging our door down.
When you look back on your life (and as you get older often you do so more frequently) don't remember the terrible things that happened to you, rather remember the good things that made your life memorable.
It's difficult to explain as it differs for every person in the world, but it doesn't really matter what you remember, because inevitably if you carry on with your life, the challenges always seem bigger - sometimes insurmountable, and it's during these times that we as humans shine.
Often the greatest achievements by humans happen in the face of impossible odds. Some of our greatest inventions, our greatest thinkers, our most important discoveries were made when adversity was banging our door down.
Pitbull
Verboten
This must be the year for me, I have never been through so much in my life than the last few months. I try and keep my head up and hold onto the hope that it will get better. It does look like my life has taken a turn for the better, but I'm not going to bet on that as yet
Hang in there mate, there is always tomorrow and the day after, just keep hoping
"Downward spirals" have happened to me in the past too. I'm the competitive type, so I try and remind myself that 1) no matter how bad things are, there are people who have had it worse than me and got through it and 2) no matter how bad things are, there are people who STILL HAVE it worse than me and are getting through it.
Unfortunately, people have problems no matter what, and getting through those problems is what helps you to grow as a person.
The hard part is convincing yourself that you can do it
Unfortunately, people have problems no matter what, and getting through those problems is what helps you to grow as a person.
The hard part is convincing yourself that you can do it
zophas
Expert Member
Small Steps. Start with the GOOD things that have happened during the day. Maybe 2 or 3. Tomorrow it will be 4 or five GOOD things. Nobody seems to say "I've had a string of GOOD things happen to me", it's always the bad things that stick in your mind. Focus on all the good stuff, before you know it your whole day will be GOOD.