2m is NOT TIGHT! it's a failure of the ref!
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the refs have been pathetic throughout the WC with the exception of a few
Oxo are introducing a new white Oxo cube with a red cross in support of the England team. It's called the Laughing Stock.
Apparently England are changing the 3 lions on the shirt to 3 tampons. A spokesman for the FA said this is to represent the worst period they have ever had.
All future England matches have been moved to the Gay Adult Channel. Apparently the sight of 11 arseholes getting hammered for 90 minutes was far too explicit for ITV.
So an angry fan managed to get into the England changing room after last night’s game. Apparently Robert Green tried to grab the man but missed.
The England team went to visit an orphanage in South Africa this morning – “it is so good to put a smile on the faces of people with no hope, constant struggling and facing the impossible” said Sipho Umboto aged 6.
All these Rob Green jokes are getting out of hand. In fact, they're crossing the line.
I'm going to be bold here, and suggest we play Heskey at left back.............left back at Heathrow Airport!!!!
He said: "I didn't notice a lack of fitness. We did some shooting the day before the game and he was smashing them past me. I was hoping that would be replicated in the game.
"The trouble for Wayne in this tournament was that all the opposition expected him to be the danger man and they did what they could to nullify his offensive capabilities.
"You have to give credit to the opposition. Teams know how good he is. They did all they could to stop him from playing. He wasn't given freedom and against Germany there were times when he had to come deep to pick the ball up.
"If he has to do that, then he's not getting the joy up front. That has to be credit to the opposition and the way they nullify him."