Getting over someone - Advice please

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Positively Negative

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Hi Forum,

I don't think this is the place to share the feels and all , and I think it's pretty silly.But anyways.
I need some serious advice with regards to getting over this one lady.Work colleague :(

We had something going on for awhile and it was real awesome. She has a boyfriend so it was never going to honestly evolve into something meaningful. My issue is that I've fallen pretty too far with her.
We still have tons of chemistry and get along etc. My issue is I want more, and she won't leave him for me.
She's told me on a number of occasions that she would rather have me (but it's complicated,culture & religion...f!@#!).

Now there is realistically no chance of us ever being exclusive. So I've tried cutting her off more and more...it never works! We have to work together too so I have to try keep things civil.I REALLY need to just move on.
But I can't. I have this sweet gf I can mess around with, but I've completely lost interest in just doing that.
This girl has some stupid trance on me and I just want out.
It sounds drastic, but if I can't shake this off...I really may consider resigning in the next month or two.

Can you all please give me some hope!?! I totally believe that out of sight/out of mind works! I didn't have to see her for the December break, and I could deal. It's the fact I see her daily that grates me.
It makes me feel sick some days. I forcefully demand my emotions to just STFU, but they have their own way.

Ok, insults and advice away :D
 
You want a relationship with awoman who has been cheating on her boyfriend? Would you like your PK now or later?
 
Go with the flow , enjoy what you can when you can , things will resolve them selves sooner or later .
Chill and enjoy it.
 
Don't ruin the fun with love, continue tapping that ass till she falls pregnant then she's all yours.
 
Positively Negative said:
Hi Forum,

I don't think this is the place to share the feels and all , and I think it's pretty silly.But anyways.
I need some serious advice with regards to getting over this one lady.Work colleague :(

We had something going on for awhile and it was real awesome. She has a boyfriend so it was never going to honestly evolve into something meaningful. My issue is that I've fallen pretty too far with her.
We still have tons of chemistry and get along etc. My issue is I want more, and she won't leave him for me.
She's told me on a number of occasions that she would rather have me (but it's complicated,culture & religion...f!@#!).

Now there is realistically no chance of us ever being exclusive. So I've tried cutting her off more and more...it never works! We have to work together too so I have to try keep things civil.I REALLY need to just move on.
But I can't. I have this sweet gf I can mess around with, but I've completely lost interest in just doing that.
This girl has some stupid trance on me and I just want out.
It sounds drastic, but if I can't shake this off...I really may consider resigning in the next month or two.

Can you all please give me some hope!?! I totally believe that out of sight/out of mind works! I didn't have to see her for the December break, and I could deal. It's the fact I see her daily that grates me.
It makes me feel sick some days. I forcefully demand my emotions to just STFU, but they have their own way.

Ok, insults and advice away :D
Click to expand...

What a situation. If she doesn't Want more and you do, be prepared to be stuck in a hole. The way I see it if your feelings don't fade, which they wont, you will want to leave your job.it's an unhealthy environment to work with someone who broke your heart. Be true to yourself, respect yourself, if you are not worthy enough to be her man, she's not worthy enough to use you. You a're both adults, approach the matter, don't beat around the Bush, either she wants you and will make it work or she doesn't and won't make it work, it is that simple. We will only risk losing someone we love if we know they are not the one. Simple.
 
Strippers.. U need to go out and get smashed and there's Strippers in that story as well
 
Time to be reflective and think honestly about the situation.

Have you really fallen for this girl, or do your feelings stem from the fact that she is unavailable relationship wise?

Perhaps you're not ready for a serious relationship at the moment. Why have you not broken up with your gf? Are you hoping your feelings for her will change?
 
jingaling said:
Time to be reflective and think honestly about the situation.

Have you really fallen for this girl, or do your feelings stem from the fact that she is unavailable relationship wise?

Perhaps you're not ready for a serious relationship at the moment. Why have you not broken up with your gf? Are you hoping your feelings for her will change?
Click to expand...

So both of them are in other relationships?
 
dreamrobin said:
What
Click to expand...

I'll put it another way. Hopefully the other relationships they are in are very 'open' in the sense they have a license to mess around. If not then it's a significant betrayal and they're both bad news and hence deserve each other.
 
Alan said:
I'll put it another way. Hopefully the other relationships they are in are very 'open' in the sense they have a license to mess around. If not then it's a significant betrayal and they're both bad news and hence deserve each other.
Click to expand...

He didn't mention he is in one.
 
1. Quit your job. Tell both bitches to go to hell (the one deserves it and the other one needs to be let of the hook)

2. Go to Catholic church and repent your sins (including calling the bitches bitches...especially the bitch that didn't deserve it)

3. Join monastery and commit to a life of celibacy and avoid any and all bitches

4. Never complain about a bitch making you feel depressed again!
 
Positively Negative said:
Hi Forum,

I don't think this is the place to share the feels and all , and I think it's pretty silly.But anyways.
I need some serious advice with regards to getting over this one lady.Work colleague :(

We had something going on for awhile and it was real awesome. She has a boyfriend so it was never going to honestly evolve into something meaningful. My issue is that I've fallen pretty too far with her.
We still have tons of chemistry and get along etc. My issue is I want more, and she won't leave him for me.
She's told me on a number of occasions that she would rather have me (but it's complicated,culture & religion...f!@#!).

Now there is realistically no chance of us ever being exclusive. So I've tried cutting her off more and more...it never works! We have to work together too so I have to try keep things civil.I REALLY need to just move on.
But I can't. I have this sweet gf I can mess around with, but I've completely lost interest in just doing that.
This girl has some stupid trance on me and I just want out.
It sounds drastic, but if I can't shake this off...I really may consider resigning in the next month or two.

Can you all please give me some hope!?! I totally believe that out of sight/out of mind works! I didn't have to see her for the December break, and I could deal. It's the fact I see her daily that grates me.
It makes me feel sick some days. I forcefully demand my emotions to just STFU, but they have their own way.

Ok, insults and advice away :D
Click to expand...
The fact that she is cheating on her BF means she actually doesn't love him, but for whatever reason is still with him. What needs to happen is, she needs to be found out cheating on him, and he will probably leave her right there, which is all you need, so keep having fun and get caught out. When you do get caught out, don't feel bad about it, but give her the chance then to go with you.

If you make her feel like a real woman, she won't cheat on you if she does go with you after getting caught out. Really you just need to help her see the light, the natural way.

Talking about it and asking her to leave him...will never work.

You just have to decide what you want to do, and go with it. If she wants to be with you, she will end up following you.
 
dreamrobin said:
He didn't mention he is in one.
Click to expand...

Positively Negative said:
I have this sweet gf I can mess around with, but I've completely lost interest in just doing that.
This girl has some stupid trance on me and I just want out.
Click to expand...

Yes. Yes he did, this makes him scum as well. Dump your GF, resign your job and man the fsck up until you know what you want and stop messing with the lives of others.
 
GhostSixFour said:
Yes. Yes he did, this makes him scum as well. Dump your GF, resign your job and man the fsck up until you know what you want and stop messing with the lives of others.
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+1
Yeah dude, how would you like if your GF did this to you?, the 2 of you are fcking up 2 other peoples lives, remember Karma's a btch.

If you are not in love with your current GF, leave her, I'm sure she does not deserve the betrayal you are putting her through. i have been cheated on before, and you have no idea of the repercussions of your actions, the trust issues that haunts the other person for years....
 
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jingaling said:
No, the gf that is "sweet" on him is the one he has no interest in. The dude is obviously not ready to commit to a serious relationship yet.
Click to expand...

It's infatuation, and it will fade. His relationship is doomed and his work life is going to suffer tremendously. There are no happy endings when it comes to love triangles.
 
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