How to **** off your sysadmin

5 minutes before knock off time report that *whatever * hasn't been working the whole day and you urgently need to use it now for something a *VVIP* needs.

If asked why you didn't report it earlier, say because you were busy while they saw you sitting around lazing about a lot during the day...
 
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I be ze sysadmin,one of my former company's Service Providers had a good way to piss me off:

When logging support call:
Step1) identify problem
Step2) Identify possible answers and explanations SP would give to avoid doing anything
Step3) Log Call with Step2 included in detail
Step4) Get answer "you did something wrong but we fixed it for you"
Step5) Rage
 
Ask him a question, for help, or advice, and when he answers you, ask him; "Are you sure?"
 
ask him for productions root password you need to make a quick change.

There should be a follow up thread "How to **** off your dba".

As a not so good (also been called cowboy) software developer I get to piss off a few people during a work day.
 
Instead of reporting a problem by saying "I have x problem" and describing the actual problem, begin by saying "Is the server/network/email/business critical system down?" or simply state "Everything's down".

Even though 99%+ of the time the answer is no, you will at least momentarily instill the admin with the fear that some heinous catastrophe has befallen a major system that he/she will be spending the next 2 days sorting out.

If possible, try to time this report no more than 1/2 an hour before the admin is due to finish work to go away on a holiday that his/her SO has been planning for the last 6 months.
 
Instead of reporting a problem by saying "I have x problem" and describing the actual problem, begin by saying "Is the server/network/email/business critical system down?" or simply state "Everything's down".

Even though 99%+ of the time the answer is no, you will at least momentarily instill the admin with the fear that some heinous catastrophe has befallen a major system that he/she will be spending the next 2 days sorting out.

If possible, try to time this report no more than 1/2 an hour before the admin is due to finish work to go away on a holiday that his/her SO has been planning for the last 6 months.

Very inexperienced sysadmin then ;)
 
If it's critical,i'll know looooooong before grunts do
 
lol, the other thing really pisses me off is a woman that works here that refers to everything as n "piepietjie"

"My rekenaar werk nie, ek dink die piepietjie wat hom aan die dingitjie konnekteer is stukkend want die piepietjie se lig kom nie aan nie.
 
That hurts. You've wounded my inner child.:cry:

If you believe your users before you believe your monitoring system, then you need a better monitoring system or you have uncannily canny users. ;)
 
M

Few days ago I had someone call me and tell me that the boss unplugged her pastel but everything else is working fine.

Get there and her network cable is unplugged :/
 
lol, the other thing really pisses me off is a woman that works here that refers to everything as n "piepietjie"

"My rekenaar werk nie, ek dink die piepietjie wat hom aan die dingitjie konnekteer is stukkend want die piepietjie se lig kom nie aan nie.

Report her to HR for sexual harrasment. Explain that she now has to refer to it as a monster.
 
Report her to HR for sexual harrasment. Explain that she now has to refer to it as a monster.

I told her I do not appreciate her calling every device she does not understand a penis. She insisted that piepietjie just means a small thing.
Long argument on this one (after all, half my family are Afrikaans).

Told her if she does not want to learn the words "wireless access point" then she should try use something even slightly descriptive in nature.
 
I told her I do not appreciate her calling every device she does not understand a penis. She insisted that piepietjie just means a small thing.
Long argument on this one (after all, half my family are Afrikaans).

Told her if she does not want to learn the words "wireless access point" then she should try use something even slightly descriptive in nature.

:D ROFLOL
 
If you believe your users before you believe your monitoring system, then you need a better monitoring system or you have uncannily canny users. ;)

Trust me the users are not that canny. I just practice a degree of professional paranoia.
 
Sigh. Was maintaining the software for a call centre.
Power goes out, generator kicks in, but due to some fault the only thing working is the phone system.
We have the call centre manager tell everyone technical is working on it and to hang tight.
I still get 20 phone calls from telemarketers saying my system is not working....
 
Sigh. Was maintaining the software for a call centre.
Power goes out, generator kicks in, but due to some fault the only thing working is the phone system.
We have the call centre manager tell everyone technical is working on it and to hang tight.
I still get 20 phone calls from telemarketers saying my system is not working....

LOL

I have to walk through several departments to get to the server room when things go wrong.
Trying my best to do things quickly obviously but every bloody person I walk past first wants an in depth discussion about the problem.
 
Create a shared folder on your PC in Cape Town, dump a couple of 10's of gigs of movies into it, then get you buddy in Jhb to start copying the folder over the network.

Then feign innocence when they trace your IP address and scream that you've brought the entire campus network traffic to a grinding halt.

Had to discipline someone for the above.
 
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