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Question of the Day: Will you be subscribing to the new Disney+ R49 streaming package?
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- Thread starter iDOL
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Skeptik
Banned
The police will try all tricks to avoid entering a new crime because they will look bad when the stats are released (if ever).
iDOL
Expert Member
Only thing is, even if they opened a measly trespassing case, they would have been able to have one success, seen as we caught him jumping over the barbwire covered wall. This after he had already been told that the person he was looking for does not reside there.
Maybe he thought that his ficticious chum was hiding out in the shed.
Maybe he thought that his ficticious chum was hiding out in the shed.
LoneGunman
Expert Member
get a gun, get a knife, shoot 'visitor' repeatedly, drop cleaned-of-fingerprints knife by hand of corpse, get hysterical, tell police he was running at you with knife. end of story.
iDOL
Expert Member
@Lonegunman too easy sir, he must suffer.
This is his itenary for his stay at our wonderful spa :
Day 1 - Bind Live subject with industrial strenght cellophane. Thank you Dex. Purchase carton cigarettes, large box of matches. Use Live subjects soles to stub out burning cigarettes.
Sharpen match sticks, use the area under Live Subjects nails to test and see how many sharpened match sticks will fit in under them.
Put him back in the kennel.
Day 2 - Use remainder of the carton of cigarettes and stub some on his tongue & eyelids. Take care to use antiseptic and cotton wool on his eyelids, as I would want him to be around for longer still.
Put him back in the kennel.
Day 3 - Use that old "lion" blades and make small cuts all in the webbing of his feet and hands. Locate a suitably flea ridden blanket from neighbours dog and cover Live subject, making sure the side with the most fleas makes adequate contact.
Put him back in the kennel.
Day 4 - Can't give too much details, but I guess you see what I am getting at
After a month or more (I ws hopig it would remain fund for 4 months)of such plesant therapy I will let him out and dump him on a corner where he can gladly crawl his way home for help.
Articles like the following also makes me more determined to follow through next time this happens,
http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=13&art_id=vn20080227113651556C320320
I will break him to ensure he will never be able to function as the animal he was before. It is folks like "our friendly visitor" and his like that cause the rest of us, that go along with the guise of being sane and civilised folks to revert to type.
This is his itenary for his stay at our wonderful spa :
Day 1 - Bind Live subject with industrial strenght cellophane. Thank you Dex. Purchase carton cigarettes, large box of matches. Use Live subjects soles to stub out burning cigarettes.
Sharpen match sticks, use the area under Live Subjects nails to test and see how many sharpened match sticks will fit in under them.
Put him back in the kennel.
Day 2 - Use remainder of the carton of cigarettes and stub some on his tongue & eyelids. Take care to use antiseptic and cotton wool on his eyelids, as I would want him to be around for longer still.
Put him back in the kennel.
Day 3 - Use that old "lion" blades and make small cuts all in the webbing of his feet and hands. Locate a suitably flea ridden blanket from neighbours dog and cover Live subject, making sure the side with the most fleas makes adequate contact.
Put him back in the kennel.
Day 4 - Can't give too much details, but I guess you see what I am getting at
After a month or more (I ws hopig it would remain fund for 4 months)of such plesant therapy I will let him out and dump him on a corner where he can gladly crawl his way home for help.
Articles like the following also makes me more determined to follow through next time this happens,
http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=13&art_id=vn20080227113651556C320320
I will break him to ensure he will never be able to function as the animal he was before. It is folks like "our friendly visitor" and his like that cause the rest of us, that go along with the guise of being sane and civilised folks to revert to type.
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Ekhaatvensters
Executive Member
We had a guy arrested for attempted burglary at our house. The maid next door saw it happen and phoned the police. As they arrived this same guy was walking down the road looking for another opportunity, so they simply loaded him into the van and he was "charged" (I don't think anything happened) with appempted burglary.
The police took a statement afaik, definitely not laughing at the crime. I think it's a good idea to talk to the station commander like you planned.
The police took a statement afaik, definitely not laughing at the crime. I think it's a good idea to talk to the station commander like you planned.
LoneGunman
Expert Member
just a minor derailment - re the bizarre "If all else fails try prayer!!!! He made you and wants to protect you and prosper you."
Sorry, but there's no evidence of this being true, or of this imaginary supernatural friend helping anyone, at least according to all the crime reports I've ever seen. Its a lovely idea, agreed - but I'd still go with the simple and effective doable option of 'shoot trespassers dead, plant a butcher knife, and call police totally hysterical'.
Sorry, but there's no evidence of this being true, or of this imaginary supernatural friend helping anyone, at least according to all the crime reports I've ever seen. Its a lovely idea, agreed - but I'd still go with the simple and effective doable option of 'shoot trespassers dead, plant a butcher knife, and call police totally hysterical'.
lion_fish
Expert Member
just a minor derailment - re the bizarre "If all else fails try prayer!!!! He made you and wants to protect you and prosper you."
Sorry, but there's no evidence of this being true, or of this imaginary supernatural friend helping anyone, at least according to all the crime reports I've ever seen. Its a lovely idea, agreed - but I'd still go with the simple and effective doable option of 'shoot trespassers dead, plant a butcher knife, and call police totally hysterical'.
Agreed. once the b@stard is dead, then we can begin the praying for forgiveness aspect...
Surv0
Executive Member
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PostmanPot
Honorary Master
Hehe. 
just a minor derailment - re the bizarre "If all else fails try prayer!!!! He made you and wants to protect you and prosper you."
Sorry, but there's no evidence of this being true, or of this imaginary supernatural friend helping anyone, at least according to all the crime reports I've ever seen. Its a lovely idea, agreed - but I'd still go with the simple and effective doable option of 'shoot trespassers dead, plant a butcher knife, and call police totally hysterical'.
Both have merit
F
Fudzy
Guest
You thought about going to the papers? They seem to love making jabs at the men in blue and I'm pretty sure it'll get attention when a hot collared commissioner starts swinging his **** stick around the station.
EchoZA
Expert Member
More than likely the station commanders brother, nothing a bullet in the back of the neck won't solve!!1 for both the station commander and his "brother" and before you go off FLAMING and saying my words are harsh, I have been through this before and the "brother" had a knife at my son's neck!!!