Leave the past behind or confront it?

W

winner

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Not sure if this topic was discussed before but anyway if you have a girlfriend whom you will like to be serious with, would you rather leave her past behind or find out and see if you can deal with it?
Sometimes ignoring the truth is like living a lie but at the same time, some pasts have no bearing in the future. Which one is rather good for you and the relationship in general?
 
What do you mean by "her past?"

Significant events in her life or just with whom and how many people she slept?

I think in both cases it's ultimately her decision if she wants to tell you and if you can't come to terms with either then that's ultimately your problem.

Jealousy has no place in a good relationship.
 
It's always better to know the person you will be spending inordinate amounts of time with! :P

A person's past is part of the makeup of the person, and if you don't know that about them, you will not understand them fully.
 
A truly deep relationship is open and honest. If you cannot transcend that intimacy barrier with that partner you have to ask yourself whether it is the right person imo.

The past shapes one's perception of the future and knowing both my and my wife's paths right down to the boring details without fear or favour allows one to share hurt, joy happiness and life experience in a different way. To have an understanding not just of one's view but of the others view of the world makes for a meaningful relationship and not just a co-existence.

If this is about sex (my advice is don't buy second hand) then you must know and get a medical opinion regardless. Such matters are childs play compared to having children.
 
Open and honest is always the better way forward.

Ignoring the past means it will simply rear it's ugly head in future.
 
This thing depends solely on what exactly this past is....no matter how you get that info

If my chick's past includes in and out of mental institutions....
 
Replay said:
This thing depends solely on what exactly this past is....no matter how you get that info

If my chick's past includes in and out of mental institutions....
Click to expand...

Exactly, if by past you mean she used to cut herself, spent time in prison for torturing puppies and was hectic on the drugs then yes, you need to know.

If it's about how many guys she slept with and who did or didn't jizz on her face, well...rather let that be. Unless she was a prozzie, you'd want to to know that.

With my girl I never wanted to know her sexual history but she told me anyways. It's not something that should bother you... Unless again she was a prozzie.
 
Better to know who else you gonna be sleeping with that first time... Haha!

If you driven by insecurity though, you screwed. Not literally.
 
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