My life is falling apart - Warning *emo*

blunomore said:
Hey Tera, don't mislead the poor guy. Time heals NOTHING. It is what you DO during that time, that can make a difference.
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If I wanted to mislead someone, I would be standing on a street holding a sign saying "collect your cash here". My point isn't to mislead him. Time does heal, not by itself as you said, but with time you progress and take more things into account than the one road block you had a few months ago.

Not everyone's cut out for living in a commune, it may be a good way to save money, but what if you have personal issues, like an illness or some form of anxiety?

You are misleading him to tell him to get out of his parents house, it's not for you to decide.
 
teraside said:
If I wanted to mislead someone, I would be standing on a street holding a sign saying "collect your cash here". My point isn't to mislead him. Time does heal, not by itself as you said, but with time you progress and take more things into account than the one road block you had a few months ago.

Not everyone's cut out for living in a commune, it may be a good way to save money, but what if you have personal issues, like an illness or some form of anxiety?

You are misleading him to tell him to get of his parents house, it's not for you to decide.
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I did not tell him to get out of his parents house. I said if the house belong to them instead of him, then he has no choice but to leave if they are selling it.

I really do not believe in pampering 23 year olds, which I think he said is his age. If young people get out into the big wide world on their own for the first time, it often means doing without all those things you are used to for a while, but that builds character.
 
Hang in there mate ... us oldies know that time makes things better ... just as long you also play the game and make the most of every opportunity.
 
Killove said:
So, I know there have been a lot of emo threads lately, but I feel I deserve one too.

I'm 23 and have just started my first job (so obviously I'm not getting paid that much.)
My parents are kicking me out of my house because they are moving to Durban.
My girlfriend is going back to Durban in July to further her studies.

So i'm going to have no home (cant afford a place on my own), no girl, and no money.

If you see a young white guy begging on Grayston drive in Sandton, thats me.
Any small change would be appreciated.
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Been there, done that. First job, girlfriend moved back to Grahamstown (which subsequently ended badly :/). I gave it up all as a bad idea after 6 months moved to England working my way around for about a year. Came back, found a nice place to live, got my old job back, nice new car. All seemed to fall into place.

So don't get too dispondent. I know it is all a bit overwhelming. Now you don't need to move to another continent to get perspective, just take a step back and realise things are changing for the better. If the change and some things break it is because you are finally taking full control of your entire life and things are just realigning themselves to prepare you for a much better future!
 
blunomore said:
I did not tell him to get out of his parents house. I said if the house belong to them instead of him, then he has no choice but to leave if they are selling it.

I really do not believe in pampering 23 year olds, which I think he said is his age. If young people get out into the big wide world on their own for the first time, it often means doing without all those things you are used to for a while, but that builds character.
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Ouch!
 
Cara said:
Ouch!
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Yeah it may be the painful truth, but it's still the truth IMO. It's so easy to stay with mom and have your laundry done, and your bills mostly paid for etc, but at some point you do have to get out there and do it by yourself.

Its hard, and it hurts to hear it, but I think its reality. It's also incredibly rewarding at the end of it to look back and say : 'Wow, look at everything I've acheived for myself'.
 
Cara said:
Ouch!
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A lot of people, myself included, earned a small salary when we started working. I had to live in a dingy little flat and was not able to eat fancy meals. I had to walk to work.

It did not matter to me that I 'suffered' financially. I was proud to be able to say that I earned my money on my own an in an honest matter. Surely that is something to be proud of.

I do not see it as harsh .... just good advice to get someone through life. Sorry if people think it is too strong.
 
superB said:
Yeah it may be the painful truth, but it's still the truth IMO. It's so easy to stay with mom and have your laundry done, and your bills mostly paid for etc, but at some point you do have to get out there and do it by yourself.

Its hard, and it hurts to hear it, but I think its reality. It's also incredibly rewarding at the end of it to look back and say : 'Wow, look at everything I've acheived for myself'.
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"Wow, look at everything I've acheived for myself. And now I have no more money for beer? Sigh." :p
 
blunomore said:
A lot of people, myself included, earned a small salary when we started working. I had to live in a dingy little flat and was not able to eat fancy meals. I had to walk to work.

It did not matter to me that I 'suffered' financially. I was proud to be able to say that I earned my money on my own an in an honest matter. Surely that is something to be proud of.

I do not see it as harsh .... just good advice to get someone through life. Sorry if people think it is too strong.
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I understand completely, been there. Fortunately I landed my bum in the butter with my first rental. Bought a house 2 years after that, and damn, if reality didn't come crashing down. These places cost how much???
 
Not bad advice at all and I agree with it. The 3 months I was on my own (only 2 counted basically) were tough, but I'm glad I did it. Also, I don't stay with my parents, haven't been staying with them since I was 19, but I do stay with a family member.

Don't get me wrong, it's not a bad idea to get out of your parents house and work and live on your own, but you have to be sure that you are moving out for the right reasons, not because of a missunderstanding, or because you "think" someone is kicking you out. Like someone said, plan it, work at it and then go on your own, it doesn't help jumping in the pool if you can't even swim.

I work where I live, I work for the things I use and things I need, it's not always fun, but I have to do it. And it's much better knowing that I stay with someone who loves me, than to stay with strangers who hate me (which is the truth, strangers hate me).

I'm not going to live like this for the rest of my life, I'm going to furthere my education and get to a level where I know I can safely look after myself.

Ciao ;)
 
You thinks thats bad , My pc Broke and now I have No use living any more. I think I will just drink shampoo or soap or something and end my misery.
 
Moving to Durban is precisely the idea I have.... or should I say, moving BACK to Durban..... :)
 
teraside said:
And it's much better knowing that I stay with someone who loves me, than to stay with strangers who hate me (which is the truth, strangers hate me).
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So THAT's why I always get this bad taste in my mouth whenever I see your nick? :p
Anyway, 23's a good age to start thinking of making it on your own. You should have a year or two's experience behind your name by now so you should be able to get a steady job. Just give up smoking, dstv and booz (GF's are CRAZY expensive as well but you already gave that up :D)
Cut your expenses and pull some overtime...maybe get a second job.
 
lol tera, I'm just teasing... you're an alright guy ;)
As for this thread: I'd like to remove ALL sympathy for this guy. He has NOTHING to complain about. Just a spoilt brat.
 
Messugga said:
lol tera, I'm just teasing... you're an alright guy ;)
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Thanks, I got a bad taste in my mouth too, but it's because a piece of oninion is stuck in my tooth ;) :D :p hehehe.

I think Killove is used to some money, which I'm not used to, but he just needs a nudge in the right direction :)
 
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