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superB

Senior Member
Joined
Sep 30, 2006
Messages
765
What would you do in the following situation:

You and your partner live together. Your partner attends a support group 2 or 3 nights a week (home by 9pm). Do you shut down and say you never see your partner and therefore its never going work? Do you accept it? Do you encourage it?

How do you react?

Bare in mind that this 'support group' is not a social event but rather a series of meetings designed to aid and support recovery.
 

Gazer

Expert Member
Joined
Jun 8, 2005
Messages
1,059
I think that you can't live in each other's pockets and each person in the relationship needs their own space. If one of the people need to attend a support group then it should be encouraged because they're obviously doing something to improve themselves which in the long run will improve the relationship.

I'd rather my partner attended support than have the problem (which in turn would become my problem).
 

Dolby

Honorary Master
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
26,973
I think it depends.

Is it constantly the same days and always at the same time?

Personally I'd get annoyed if it changed days and times so I never knew when I'd be seeing my girlfriend or what time she'd come home.
 

superB

Senior Member
Joined
Sep 30, 2006
Messages
765
I think it depends.

Is it constantly the same days and always at the same time?

Personally I'd get annoyed if it changed days and times so I never knew when I'd be seeing my girlfriend or what time she'd come home.
I dont see how that makes a difference? Surely you are informed of the if and when?
 

blunomore

Honorary Master
Joined
Jul 8, 2007
Messages
26,789
I think that you can't live in each other's pockets and each person in the relationship needs their own space. If one of the people need to attend a support group then it should be encouraged because they're obviously doing something to improve themselves which in the long run will improve the relationship.

I'd rather my partner attended support than have the problem (which in turn would become my problem).

Amen.
 

Nocturnity

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 17, 2005
Messages
2,005
I never get people who constantly need to be with each other 24/7. That would drive me utterly insane! I love my girlfriend dearly but while she has band practice 2 or 3 times a week, it gives me some time to sort out all the things I struggle to do with her around. I seriously need a little space from time to time and a clingy girlfriend wouldn't last very long.

Being in a relationship does not mean you have to give up who you are or what you enjoy. I see it more as a partnership. You spend time together and enjoy each others company but it's a bad idea to be so dependant on someone that you can't function if they're gone for an hour a day.

That said, if you only get to see the person 4 days a week and they're gone for an hour or two 3 out of those 4 days, you have a problem. It's all about balance, I reckon.
 

Ænema

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jun 26, 2008
Messages
414
I would even consider joining a recovering necrophile support group just to get out the house a bit during the week….luckily I have a 10 year tradition of drinks after work, Wednesday’s and Friday’s for the space WE need…Can’t be with someone 24/7.
 

Nod

Executive Member
Joined
Jul 22, 2005
Messages
8,768
I would even consider joining a recovering necrophile support group just to get out the house a bit during the week….luckily I have a 10 year tradition of drinks after work, Wednesday’s and Friday’s for the space WE need…Can’t be with someone 24/7.
You also like to crack open a cold one? :eek: :D
 

timgaul

Honorary Master
Joined
Nov 9, 2005
Messages
11,565
dose

Crazy she can handle, but stupid too? :rolleyes:
Its a typo alright! I've been staring at figures and code for several hours now, I can't edit everything!

You know I'm only stupid when highly intoxicated! :p
 

blunomore

Honorary Master
Joined
Jul 8, 2007
Messages
26,789
I never get people who constantly need to be with each other 24/7. That would drive me utterly insane! I love my girlfriend dearly but while she has band practice 2 or 3 times a week, it gives me some time to sort out all the things I struggle to do with her around. I seriously need a little space from time to time and a clingy girlfriend wouldn't last very long.

Being in a relationship does not mean you have to give up who you are or what you enjoy. I see it more as a partnership. You spend time together and enjoy each others company but it's a bad idea to be so dependant on someone that you can't function if they're gone for an hour a day.

That said, if you only get to see the person 4 days a week and they're gone for an hour or two 3 out of those 4 days, you have a problem. It's all about balance, I reckon.

Yes, the opposite is also true.

I only see Mr Blu on Fri, Sat and Sun.
 

Dolby

Honorary Master
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
26,973
That said, if you only get to see the person 4 days a week and they're gone for an hour or two 3 out of those 4 days, you have a problem. It's all about balance, I reckon.

I understand about the 24/7 thing - but I'm coming from from the above quote.

I knew a friend who's girlfriend wanted to do photography classes on Monday evenings - which was cool. She enjoyed the classes - and added another day - with even a third day being added a few times.

Sometimes afterwards the group would do dinners and social events - which even went to the weekends at times.

I'd be a little upset seeing my live in partner randomly for 50% of the week :/
 

Dolby

Honorary Master
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
26,973
Yes, the opposite is also true.

I only see Mr Blu on Fri, Sat and Sun.
See?

For me, that would bug me. I know it's a personal thing and you're good - but I saw my girlfriend more than when we de dated and lived 20km apart.
 

timgaul

Honorary Master
Joined
Nov 9, 2005
Messages
11,565
What would you do in the following situation:

You and your partner live together. Your partner attends a support group 2 or 3 nights a week (home by 9pm). Do you shut down and say you never see your partner and therefore its never going work? Do you accept it? Do you encourage it?

How do you react?

Bare in mind that this 'support group' is not a social event but rather a series of meetings designed to aid and support recovery.
Some people use the term 6-pack but I prefer "support group" :D
 

timgaul

Honorary Master
Joined
Nov 9, 2005
Messages
11,565
See?

For me, that would bug me. I know it's a personal thing and you're good - but I saw my girlfriend more than when we de dated and lived 20km apart.
DJK: hand Dolby the box of tissues over there, thanks.
 
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