Please. Thank You.

blunomore

blunomore

Honorary Master
Joined
Jul 8, 2007
Messages
26,789
Reaction score
21
Location
Not yet CT ...
I think I have an obsession with good manners.

Apparently "please" and "thank you" are now optional .... were the majority of people raised by wolves ??

Do you experience the same?
 
Yes, I do. And I smack my kids whenever they forget or I just ignore them. Admittedly it is not too often as they have had many years of it being drilled into them - "manners maketh the man".

Same as opening doors, standing back to let the elderly pass, helping the elderly cross roads, etc.

My pet peeve - not pushing your chair back under the table when you leave!
 
MickeyD said:
Yes, I do. And I smack my kids whenever they forget or I just ignore them. Admittedly it is not too often as they have had many years of it being drilled into them - "manners maketh the man".

Same as opening doors, standing back to let the elderly pass, helping the elderly cross roads, etc.

My pet peeve - not pushing your chair back under the table when you leave!
Click to expand...

One can of course overlook this is if it is a young child, but adults ... really pathetic when they lack manners.
 
Yeah, it grates me, but not as much as idiots throwing stuff out their car...
 
I'm glad that someone raised this because good manners are in short supply nowadays.

Whenever someone asks me for something and don't say "please", I somehow feel like I've been ordered/commanded so I respectfully remind them to say please.

My nieces and nephews again, slip up from time to time but on the whole, they're all good. Since they were kids, I treated them with respect so they basically just mirror my behaviour.
 
Manners are just dying out.
I think that manners just show you respect the people around you. As the general respect of people for people dwindle, so do the manners.
 
blunomore said:
I think I have an obsession with good manners.

Apparently "please" and "thank you" are now optional .... were the majority of people raised by wolves ??

Do you experience the same?
Click to expand...

Chivalry is dying due to this.

I always hold the door / wait for women to walk through before me in public. More often than not they'll walk through and completely ignore me. I then always say out loud "you're welcome!", causing them to either walk off quickly or make some snide remark. I've even once had a woman push me from behind because I was waiting for other women to walk through a door once.

I don't do it to impress anyone, it's just how I was taught...and oddly enough, the one-out-of-50 times that a woman DOES thank me, it makes up for all the other times.
 
Voicy said:
Chivalry is dying due to this.

I always hold the door / wait for women to walk through before me in public. More often than not they'll walk through and completely ignore me. I then always say out loud "you're welcome!", causing them to either walk off quickly or make some snide remark. I've even once had a woman push me from behind because I was waiting for other women to walk through a door once.

I don't do it to impress anyone, it's just how I was taught...and oddly enough, the one-out-of-50 times that a woman DOES thank me, it makes up for all the other times.
Click to expand...

I often hold doors open for people, they always tend to thank me. Perhaps I look scary enough that they feel it's a good idea to say thanks. Or perhaps you look scary and I look approachable, who knows?
 
copacetic said:
I often hold doors open for people, they always tend to thank me. Perhaps I look scary enough that they feel it's a good idea to say thanks. Or perhaps you look scary and I look approachable, who knows?
Click to expand...

Perverted magic trick ;)

I often play it straight and avert it. One time there was a woman who expected me to open the door for her and I told her it's the 21st century and equal rights for everyone.
 
Some people at my (corporate) job look you in the face and do not greet you (after you have). Rude obnoxious bastards.
 
My wife and I also believe in the common courtesy and "please" and "thank you". Our girls, 3yrs and 7yrs old, sometimes slip up, but mostly remember. They are taught to keep things tidy and clean up after themselves, regardless of where they are. I keep the door open for other people, and stand up if there are elderly in the room who need a seat. I also sometimes experience the blank stare at work when I greet some people.
 
blunomore said:
I think I have an obsession with good manners.

Apparently "please" and "thank you" are now optional .... were the majority of people raised by wolves ??

Do you experience the same?
Click to expand...

Nothing wrong with good manners, it shows respect and upbringing, something i think is lacking a little nowadays, as more and more people tend towards a sense of entitlement, rather than a sense of gratitude for a service or deed.

I try where possible to actually use the individuals name if they happen to wear a name tag, and find that, that simple little gesture, gets me a smile and far better level of service, from the petrol station, to the supermarket, to the restaurant.

Its the simple philosophy of "what you give, you get".
 
Nanfeishen said:
Nothing wrong with good manners, it shows respect and upbringing, something i think is lacking a little nowadays, as more and more people tend towards a sense of entitlement, rather than a sense of gratitude for a service or deed.

I try where possible to actually use the individuals name if they happen to wear a name tag, and find that, that simple little gesture, gets me a smile and far better level of service, from the petrol station, to the supermarket, to the restaurant.

Its the simple philosophy of "what you give, you get".
Click to expand...

For me, just treating folk in those positions as people, as opposed to automatons, as I am sure many do, elicits the warmest of responses from 90% of the individuals I deal with.

When I ask them how they are, I mean it, as I am sure they probably hate sitting there and would appreciate at least a genuine acknowledgement of their situation.

Which brings me to the point that politeness has to be genuine, not just a show you put on for forms sake. I think most of us are pretty attuned to falseness, and nothing irritates me more personally than a plastic smile.
 
Chivalry should actually die, women fought for freedom and equality and yet still expect this? Yes it is nice to do but it shouldn't be the end all of everything. Also in some cultures the man walks through the door first as a sign of respect for the woman as he is showing he is willing to make sure it is safe for her to follow him, for some reason western culture has it the woman walks in first??
 
copacetic said:
For me, just treating folk in those positions as people, as opposed to automatons, as I am sure many do, elicits the warmest of responses from 90% of the individuals I deal with.

When I ask them how they are, I mean it, as I am sure they probably hate sitting there and would appreciate at least a genuine acknowledgement of their situation.

Which brings me to the point that politeness has to be genuine, not just a show you put on for forms sake. I think most of us are pretty attuned to falseness, and nothing irritates me more personally than a plastic smile.
Click to expand...

You're right there.

Whenever I buy snacks at a petrol station shop or at a 24hr steers at 2am I always buy a sucker for each of the staff at the tills. It's a minuscule amount but it goes a long way. It definitely does make them feel less like drones being ignored by 'upper-society'.

People are people.
 
Voicy said:
You're right there.

Whenever I buy snacks at a petrol station shop or at a 24hr steers at 2am I always buy a sucker for each of the staff at the tills. It's a minuscule amount but it goes a long way. It definitely does make them feel less like drones being ignored by 'upper-society'.

People are people.
Click to expand...

thats pretty cool!!
 
Lupus said:
Chivalry should actually die, women fought for freedom and equality and yet still expect this? Yes it is nice to do but it shouldn't be the end all of everything. Also in some cultures the man walks through the door first as a sign of respect for the woman as he is showing he is willing to make sure it is safe for her to follow him, for some reason western culture has it the woman walks in first??
Click to expand...

I've held doors open for people with all a manner of genitalia.
 
Precisely if you going to hold doors open it should be equal, not just for women.
 
Men and women are equal in terms of rights and respect...they are in no way equal in physical form. Denying this is denying what they are.

If a feminist wants me to see her as an equal in every possible way, then she first has to hold her own in a fist fight. Why they see it as an insult when you treat them like ladies is beyond me...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top
Sign up to the MyBroadband newsletter
X