Project managers everywhere

H

HavocXphere

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Had my first run-in today with a project thats full of project managers. Like 20% of the staff is PMs.

All I can say is...What...The...Fk.

Gnatt charts & powerpoints everywhere yet they don't help with the actual work. Oh and they set up a time schedule that has zero room for schedule slippage. ZERO. :confused::wtf:

Oh and like three sets of daily meetings.

How do people get work done with these guys around?
 
That is the only way to make sure the project is successful.

We cannot trust minions like you to get their work done without all kinds of ongoing monitoring. That cannot be done by one or two PMs. It should be obvious that the tighter the schedule the more PMs you need. Having made sure that there are enough PMs on the project, surely there is no way there could ever be any slippage.

We are professionals we don't plan to fail.

In the unlikely event the project fails, it can only be your fault!
 
scammaster said:
That is the only way to make sure the project is successful.

We cannot trust minions like you to get their work done without all kinds of ongoing monitoring. That cannot be done by one or two PMs. It should be obvious that the tighter the schedule the more PMs you need. Having made sure that there are enough PMs on the project, surely there is no way there could ever be any slippage.

We are professionals we don't plan to fail.

In the unlikely event the project fails, it can only be your fault!
Click to expand...

yawn .....
 
You are lucky, here we have PM's to micro manage the other PM's, and we get invited to their meetings as well as the lower PM's cant speak tech.
 
That ^^^^ is one of my all time favorites. Can watch it over and over again.
 
scammaster said:
That is the only way to make sure the project is successful.

We cannot trust minions like you to get their work done without all kinds of ongoing monitoring. That cannot be done by one or two PMs. It should be obvious that the tighter the schedule the more PMs you need. Having made sure that there are enough PMs on the project, surely there is no way there could ever be any slippage.

We are professionals we don't plan to fail.

In the unlikely event the project fails, it can only be your fault!
Click to expand...

:D
 
HavocXphere said:
Had my first run-in today with a project thats full of project managers. Like 20% of the staff is PMs.

All I can say is...What...The...Fk.

Gnatt charts & powerpoints everywhere yet they don't help with the actual work. Oh and they set up a time schedule that has zero room for schedule slippage. ZERO. :confused::wtf:

Oh and like three sets of daily meetings.

How do people get work done with these guys around?
Click to expand...
Sounds like a recipe for disaster.

Raise these as risks in the meetings. Remind them how you not doing Dev is slowing down the work.
 
And get your software development manager to grow a set of balls and challenge the PM.

It's obviously a big project that a lot of senior people have their eye on so of course they are going to go nuclear in managing it.
 
PMs and BAs with their ring fences and low hanging fruit. :sick:
 
Who doesnt like pretty charts that change weekly because they were originally totally unrealistic?

You have to learn to play the game though. Make sure you add all the time you spend in those meetings to the charts.
 
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Drifter said:
That ^^^^ is one of my all time favorites. Can watch it over and over again.
Click to expand...

+1 +1 +1



crackersa said:
Raise these as risks in the meetings. Remind them how you not doing Dev is slowing down the work.
Click to expand...

This is what gets people fired. Ask those at Enron who mentioned things werent looking good.
 
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The discipline of a Project manager has incredible value and, if used correctly, increase the probability of a project success. However, the problem arises that not everyone that does a PMBOK or PRINCE2 makes good project managers. Most of the time, they follow a formulas instead of understanding the principles of good project management. I've worked with good PM's, and bad PM's. The good ones tend to be more focused on delivering and removing obstacles than do meetings and charts.
 
creeper said:
The discipline of a Project manager has incredible value and, if used correctly, increase the probability of a project success. However, the problem arises that not everyone that does a PMBOK or PRINCE2 makes good project managers. Most of the time, they follow a formulas instead of understanding the principles of good project management. I've worked with good PM's, and bad PM's. The good ones tend to be more focused on delivering and removing obstacles than do meetings and charts.
Click to expand...
Well said...they stick to a manual and can't think outside of the box. And in my experiences they forget that the team is made of people.
 
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