Rude colleagues

thestaggy said:
I'm fully aware of how hollow the statement "How are you?" is. Unless you are my immediate family I'm not really too bothered, but I suppose it's part of the whole greeting procedure.
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When you aske a colleague "How are you?" believeing it is merely a hollow statement, and he/she answers "Not too good today" or something similar, would you just walk away or be interested why?
 
Neck_Monster said:
1st world problems :p "I don't like the way he replies to my question" :D

Challenge your collegue, give him something he cannot argue with ;)
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I consider history - yeah, I'm boring like that, I know - to be an area where I'm highly knowledgeable. Apparently I know squat. . . My economics textbooks are also lying to me, so I'm probably going to fail my exam next week.

Maybe I should take interest in an obscure subject?
 
OGroteKoning said:
When you aske a colleague "How are you?" believeing it is merely a hollow statement, and he/she answers "Not too good today" or something similar, would you just walk away or be interested why?
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I did. The first few times I did ask I was met with trivial/weak stuff - "Traffic" or some "Yeah, uhmm, mumble jumble. . .". After a while of getting told that "you could be better" every day, it's kind of a downer and loses it's impact. You're just a rude and likely unhappy person. And proceeding to brush me off afterwards will pretty much ensure that I don't give a toss eventually.
 
cerebus said:
Sounds like he's the one cold-shouldering you. A bit late to reciprocate but good luck taking that stand.
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True, unless he wants to turn a conversation into a long-winded lecture.

I sound like a chick now.
 
Haldex said:
Lol even after your spell check edit, its still wrong:D
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I only picked up on disingenuous, but I done a hurried proofread.

So far 4 cases of misspelling in what is a sizeable post. Not too shabby, Nige.
 
thestaggy said:
I consider history - yeah, I'm boring like that, I know - to be an area where I'm highly knowledgeable. Apparently I know squat. . . My economics textbooks are also lying to me, so I'm probably going to fail my exam next week.

Maybe I should take interest in an obscure subject?
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don't ask him how he is. i was the same, i used to get pissed if people didn't greet me when i greeted them, but you eventually grow out of that and shrug things like this off. what i recommend is being cheerful and giving him a cheerful hello. if you're genuinely not interested in his day or life, don't ask him, or another interesting thing i've found, ask in a serious way, like you notice something is out of place, which will make him immediately try to figure out what you're digging for
 
The question is are you genuinely interested in his well-being or just playing out an empty ritual? Personally I find it tedious when people ask me how I am when they don't really care and would probably get annoyed if I was honest. Saying hello is enough as far as I'm concerned, unless an honest answer to how are you is welcome. I'll generally reciprocate a hello even with someone I don't like and wouldn't greet first.

Number 2 though does seem a bit off. Dealt with manager like that once. Several people warned his manager that he was making the workplace unpleasant, then senior people started talking about leaving if he wasn't removed or reigned in. They eventually canned the guy after their three top technical people had jumped ship. Three more left anyway because this guy had managed to sour the whole environment around him.
 
If the cashiers at supermarkets ask how are you, try answering "terrible" to see if they actually even listened to your answer !
 
blunomore said:
If the cashiers at supermarkets ask how are you, try answering "terrible" to see if they actually even listened to your answer !
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Done that before. Waited for a reply, but they only smiled. It was like they did not understand the same language they asked the question in
 
Why do people expect a lenghty response to "how are you"? . I say " good and yourself ", even if it's bad (might say "busy but good"). I don't expect a story, and I believe if they ask me, they don't expect a story. If you REALLY wanted to know, you can get into detail. Saying Hello is just bleh.. like a stranger. you spend more time with a co-worker than your SO almost..

It's not a empty gesture...
 
I know a know-it-all type, they always know better, everything is always bigger, better, worse, smaller, (insert any story you have here)er
I sometimes wonder if they realize how full of poo they are
 
grav80 said:
My wife's friend's husband is like that. He owns a fridge/aircon repair place and the other day our fridge gave in. I'd rather put all our food in the chest freezer until I have money to fix the fridge than to ask him for his opinion on what might be wrong.

I hate people with the "know-it-all" outlook on life!
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Lol..

But you don't understand. She will almost argue with you about your story. If you pee green because of medicine she'll tell you different. At a stage to save the friendship, you just say "yes". He is my friend, she is not.

Mutual friend of ours also said they don't visit them anymore because of her... (now you know how bad it is)
 
noxibox said:
The question is are you genuinely interested in his well-being or just playing out an empty ritual? Personally I find it tedious when people ask me how I am when they don't really care and would probably get annoyed if I was honest. Saying hello is enough as far as I'm concerned, unless an honest answer to how are you is welcome. I'll generally reciprocate a hello even with someone I don't like and wouldn't greet first.

Number 2 though does seem a bit off. Dealt with manager like that once. Several people warned his manager that he was making the workplace unpleasant, then senior people started talking about leaving if he wasn't removed or reigned in. They eventually canned the guy after their three top technical people had jumped ship. Three more left anyway because this guy had managed to sour the whole environment around him.
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I wouldn't say I am genuinely interested and I did acknowledge that fact. BUT, for most people it makes up part of the process of greeting someone and if someone does ask you that you should answer and return it. Common courtesy. I always respond. If you say "How are you?" to be I generally respons "All good, and yourself?".

I understand that outside of family and close friends nobody really cares about you and they care even less about your problems, but that does not mean you can't acknowledge someone greeting you. I'm not the most talkative guy or one of those obnoxiously sunny people, but I have the deceny to greet people and to respond to them when they greet me.
 
I have one particular woman in the office who can only say negative things. It really annoys me, but I tend to ignore it. I'd love to ask her one day if she's ever heard the saying "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything" but I think she's too fragile to handle that.
 
i'm not a morning person and do not want a conversation when i arrive at work. just because someone else is a little ray of sunshine at 8:00am doesn't mean i have to be. "hi" or "morning" should be enough until you've both settled down for the day.
 
In my 20 years+ of working, I can't recall a single rude person. I often have people say to me, "so and so is a rude so and so". I just shrug and respond that they haven't been rude to me, or not so much that I noticed. Lol. Maybe that's it. I simply don't notice it. Subconsciously just brush it off. Couldn't care less. They are what they are. Move on. Time for a cup of tea :)
 
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