The Handshake

[Chevron]

A while ago we had a thread here on handshakes and some people said they don't shake hands at all, while others said they didn't know you even had different handshakes.

I just came across this and thought I'd share on the importance of a good handshake:

http://www.slideshare.net/BernardMarr/6-ways-not-to-shake-hands

 

[Zewp]

Shaking hands is such a disgusting practice and it makes no sense at all. Especially because you have no idea where the person you're shaking hands with had his hands before it. He might have scratched his herpes rash just before he shook hands with you.

 

[Picard]

I have a 1000 kids that rotate through my class every week. I often have to work with the mice and keyboards of the workstations.

That's why I have two plastic containers of wet sanitary wipes on my desk at all times.

 

[Chevron]

Shaking hands is such a disgusting practice and it makes no sense at all. Especially because you have no idea where the person you're shaking hands with had his hands before it. He might have scratched his herpes rash just before he shook hands with you.

And that's exactly why it's disrespectful to NOT shake someone's hand. They'll take it as you're saying they are dirty.

 

[akescpt]

Fsuck that. People are disgusting. Men at work that don't wash hands after the toilet. And not even people who you would suspect of being do vuil!

 

[Rocket Raccoon]

Shaking hands is such a disgusting practice and it makes no sense at all. Especially because you have no idea where the person you're shaking hands with had his hands before it. He might have scratched his herpes rash just before he shook hands with you.

I'm suddenly reminded of that episode of Monk where he shakes the hand of a black dude and immediately cleans his afterwards.

 

[AstroTurf]

I only shake hands if I must.

In this day and age the only people you should be touching is your partner and children.

 

[M3mPh1z]

I had no idea the general consensus was that shaking hands is dirty.

Doesn't that go for touching absolutely anything in public domain though?

I am a big believer in a strong eye contact hand shake when introducing yourself.

 

[Rocket Raccoon]

In this day and age the only people you should be touching is your partner and children.

Is that you, Josef Fritzl?

 

[Mike Hoxbig]

I try to bro-fist whenever possible. Some guys who I know don't wash their hands when they go to the bathroom, are often the ones who like to shake hands.

 

[Zewp]

And that's exactly why it's disrespectful to NOT shake someone's hand. They'll take it as you're saying they are dirty.

So I should shake a potentially dirty person's hand, so that they don't think I think they might be dirty. That makes a lot of sense.

 

[Chevron]

I had no idea the general consensus was that shaking hands is dirty.

Doesn't that go for touching absolutely anything in public domain though?

I am a big believer in a strong eye contact hand shake when introducing yourself.

This. Creates a good first impression. Shows that you are confident.

So I should shake a potentially dirty person's hand, so that they don't think I think they might be dirty. That makes a lot of sense.

I guess if you have a desk job and don't really do social interaction you don't need to do it.

 

[Picard]

Just a thought ...

When I wipe my ass, no piece of skin of my fingers ever touch a piece of ****.

When I have a piss I don't dribble on my hands.

My dick is always washed better than many other parts of my body.

So ... even if you shake my hand after I've been to the toilet ... and if I didn't wash it (which will in any case never happen) ... you are perfectly safe.

 

[Zewp]

Unless you have jock itch. Or herpes.

Plus, we have no idea where your hands were before you went to the bathroom. You might have been fingering a $2 hooker.

 

[Mike Hoxbig]

Just a thought ...

When I wipe my ass, no piece of skin of my fingers ever touch a piece of ****.

When I have a piss I don't dribble on my hands.

My dick is always washed better than many other parts of my body.

So ... even if you shake my hand after I've been to the toilet ... and if I didn't wash it (which will in any case never happen) ... you are perfectly safe.

Don't care, it's still siff. Digging your nose and touching someone probably isn't harmful, but it's still gross.

 

[Noquarter]

Unless you have jock itch. Or herpes.

Plus, we have no idea where your hands were before you went to the bathroom. You might have been fingering a $2 hooker.

Who would pay $2 for a hooker ?

 

[Noquarter]

I'll shake anyone's hands except the dudes living on the street.
Afterwards I'll make sure my hands are washed with water and some form of soap. Normally I have a small bottle of dettol in the car as well. With this I make a water based solution in a tiny spray bottle to spray on my hands at random.
The important thing is not to eat with those hands. So really it doesn't matter if you've got the herpes infested nut sweat of another guy on your hands, just make sure you wash them properly before you eat.

 

[scudsucker]

You guys are ridiculous.

Hands get dirty in 1000000000 ways, yours included. Your immune system is designed to cope with the dirt. Some other guy's dirt/piss/cum/R20 hooker juice is just going to be fair game for your white blood cells- IF it even gets that far.

 

[SauRoNZA]

Doesn't that go for touching absolutely anything in public domain though?

Precisely!

If you can't even shake hands you might as well go live in a bubble.

 

[Pho3nix]

Who would pay $2 for a hooker ?

Someone with only $2?