Why do people cheat?

APoc184 said:
This is not discussion to "expand your bubble".
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I was upset and impulsive.. the deception thing just really really bothers me.

So I am sorry I personally apologized to the people I insulted.
 
Random Hero said:
I was upset and impulsive.. the deception thing just really really bothers me.

So I am sorry I personally apologized to the people I insulted.
Click to expand...

An open relationship, which you scolded Baxteen over, and hotwife as I've mentioned is not deception at all.

It is all about communication and being comfortable with your partner and their sexual desires.

And no I am not involved in any of those two but I also don't judge people that are into it.

Cheating is another story and I agree with several posters that you should just leave if you want other ventures. But I don't think it is that easy for everyone. Every situation and person is different. And even then I do not judge.

You will never know the true version. Even in your scenario there are three versions. His, hers and the truth.
 
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I have a scenario I would like you to comment on:

Say you and a girl are seeing each other and things are going great, your chemistry mixes well, you share similar interest and everything is great. So you and this person has been exclusive for a while.

Now lets say you go out one night to party. you have a good time and talk with some randoms play some pool and what ever.

So you notice a guy is trying to get comfortable with the girl you are with so you ignore it because you trust that she will not allow the behaviour. Later on you see, said random guy taking your girl to the bar and get some shots. the guy is very friendly with his arm around her waist at the bar. So you get upset walk over and push the douchebag away and grab her aside and ask what is up with that?

So she gets upset about it and an argument starts.

Who is at fault here?


My opinion

I say she is... we are out together having a great time so why would you allow such behaviour.. we've had some deep discussions and made things exclusive and told each other that we are in love with one another.. So the right thing to do is not to mess around and tell your partner that said guy is trying some ****. and then when he confronts you not to start an argument when you know it was wrong and that you would be upset if you were in his shoes.




Yeah this happened to me the Friday before I broke it off with Crazy Daisy. In her drunkenness she called me jealous, a schizo and compared me to a previous boyfriend. the some of the douchbag (who probably had one thing on his mind) cam and asked if we want to play a game with them. I said no "**** off" and then she got up and looked like she was on her way there. then i got up went to pay the bill headed for the door.. she came running back said whatsup and shes sorry.. whatever whatever.. she cam home with me.. had another argument.. she just went to bed I was like wtf... I cant believe I am going to bed with this animosity. then next morning when all was sober, things were great, I made breakfast.. she complimented me on saying "You would make a great husband someday"(I felt flattered). So 2 days later decided to have a serious talk.. gave it to her straight. In or out. she felt between two world (me and her studies or her studies without me). I ended it.. removed her from social networks and any other ties.. Going on with my life.
 
Random Hero said:
I have a scenario I would like you to comment on:

Say you and a girl are seeing each other and things are going great, your chemistry mixes well, you share similar interest and everything is great. So you and this person has been exclusive for a while.

Now lets say you go out one night to party. you have a good time and talk with some randoms play some pool and what ever.

So you notice a guy is trying to get comfortable with the girl you are with so you ignore it because you trust that she will not allow the behaviour. Later on you see, said random guy taking your girl to the bar and get some shots. the guy is very friendly with his arm around her waist at the bar. So you get upset walk over and push the douchebag away and grab her aside and ask what is up with that?

So she gets upset about it and an argument starts.

Who is at fault here?


My opinion

I say she is... we are out together having a great time so why would you allow such behaviour.. we've had some deep discussions and made things exclusive and told each other that we are in love with one another.. So the right thing to do is not to mess around and tell your partner that said guy is trying some ****. and then when he confronts you not to start an argument when you know it was wrong and that you would be upset if you were in his shoes.




Yeah this happened to me the Friday before I broke it off with Crazy Daisy. In her drunkenness she called me jealous, a schizo and compared me to a previous boyfriend. the some of the douchbag (who probably had one thing on his mind) cam and asked if we want to play a game with them. I said no "**** off" and then she got up and looked like she was on her way there. then i got up went to pay the bill headed for the door.. she came running back said whatsup and shes sorry.. whatever whatever.. she cam home with me.. had another argument.. she just went to bed I was like wtf... I cant believe I am going to bed with this animosity. then next morning when all was sober, things were great, I made breakfast.. she complimented me on saying "You would make a great husband someday"(I felt flattered). So 2 days later decided to have a serious talk.. gave it to her straight. In or out. she felt between two world (me and her studies or her studies without me). I ended it.. removed her from social networks and any other ties.. Going on with my life.
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Sounds like you made the right choice - if she had strong feelings for you and wanted to save the relationship she would have fought to keep it going.

Put some xp in the jar of life and move on....
 
dude, you have "removed her from your social networks" how many times now?

once per thread?

you know the last time I had a relationship like that? 2007. guess what, I ended up cheating on that one.

this year for the first time me and that girl started talking again and realised we should have just been FWB.
(this is not an option for now at all, even if the SO said it was ok with her, I would rather just let it be)

I said in the first, second and third thread cut ties and move on.

the sad thing is here you feel you were cheated on. unfortunately we only know your side of this story, and for all we know she might be right here, you might have simply been possessive.

best thing to do it move on. stay single, and seeing as morals bother you so much, make sure the girls you hook up with are single as well.
 
Eish so much drama is too much for a Friday thread. Go put and get laid dude. Several times over.
 
Baxteen said:
dude, you have "removed her from your social networks" how many times now?

once per thread?

you know the last time I had a relationship like that? 2007. guess what, I ended up cheating on that one.

this year for the first time me and that girl started talking again and realised we should have just been FWB.
(this is not an option for now at all, even if the SO said it was ok with her, I would rather just let it be)

I said in the first, second and third thread cut ties and move on.

the sad thing is here you feel you were cheated on. unfortunately we only know your side of this story, and for all we know she might be right here, you might have simply been possessive.

best thing to do it move on. stay single, and seeing as morals bother you so much, make sure the girls you hook up with are single as well.
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I have moved on.. Water under the bridge... everything moved fast with her and It felt great, the thrill and being in love. but it has passed. do not feel sad about it. Oh and first she removed me when she felt unsure.. then decided she wants me then this event happened and I was over it and removed her.

I honestly feel that the explanation of the scenario was from a third part perspective.. so that's what happened.. never once did i cus at her or call her bad names. i tried to control the situation and telling her what bothered me but she flipped in her drunken state and word vomited..
 
Random Hero said:
So she gets upset about it and an argument starts.

Who is at fault here?


My opinion

I say she is... we are out together having a great time so why would you allow such behaviour.. we've had some deep discussions and made things exclusive and told each other that we are in love with one another.. So the right thing to do is not to mess around and tell your partner that said guy is trying some ****. and then when he confronts you not to start an argument when you know it was wrong and that you would be upset if you were in his shoes.
Click to expand...

Dude, you are so insecure .... the only reason she may have been chatting to the guy is because you come across as a desperate on-heat slave owner :p

let her talk to whoever the **** she wants and be held by whoever the **** she wants. if she wanted you, it would be you holding her, not the guy at the bar
 
Could be that the cheater is happy in the relationship but not completely happy with the sex or wants more variety when it comes to sex. It's a ****ty thing to do though because your partner is likely to pick up whatever nasty stuff you caught out in the wild.
 
ShaunSA said:
Eish so much drama is too much for a Friday thread. Go put and get laid dude. Several times over.
Click to expand...

Yeah im done!

Going to break some iron at the gym then see what's up for tonight with some mates...
 
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