Wife issues [Solved]

Jola said:
One thing is for sure, though, based on my experiences, those of friends, and what you read about others, women are certainly not just the innocent victims any more, there are just as many women who get involved in extra-relationship affairs as there are men doing this.
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I’m sure this has always been the case but there's been more societal pressure on women to keep it hush. I doubt today’s women are hornier than women of the past.
 
3WA said:
I’m sure this has always been the case but there's been more societal pressure on women to keep it hush. I doubt today’s women are hornier than women of the past.
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I am sure that you are right, as DNA tests on children often reveal. But modern society, and social communications, certainly make things easier, as we see with the OP. I know of a couple of situations similar to that of the OP.

Unfortunately, just finding such evidence often breaks a relationship, in the past people just didn't know.
 
BlackMamba said:
I say talk to her, tell her you are not comfortable with her flirting with the ex....stamp your **** up
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The only problem I have with this is then it is clear he's seen her phone (essentially a breach of trust) which might cause the discussion to go in a completely different direction and cause even more tension. I prefer someone's suggestion earlier in the thread about not making it clear that the message(s) have been seen and rather ask to see her phone...
 
Anonymouse123 said:
My plan as follows.

After kids go to bed speak to her about the issue at hand. after that I will inform her I am leaving tomorrow morning and the next time we meet is at a councillor Friday morning if she is serious about the relationship.

That will give her time to think if she want to be together.
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crap plan
cancel it
 
Anonymouse123 said:
I'll admit and apologize for snooping through the phone.
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Snooping on her phone in a healthy relationship is not good but when it's a unhealthy relationship it's very normal and nesssasary. Nobody wants to feel like they are overreacting and would rather act on facts. I am all for it if it is used to confirm your gut feeling's as apposed to being continuous unprovoked spying and controlling behaviour.
 
Jola said:
Hmm, just watched the trailer, yeah that should work. She may not sit through the movie, though.
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If she does, she's already racked with guilt. Best movie that captures the emotional and psychological state of a woman embarking on an extramarital affair.
 
A joke to lighten the mood while we wait for the kids to go bed....

A lawyer walks into a doctor's office with a huge tumor on his face. Doctor says, “Why didn’t you come sooner?”
The tumor says, “To be honest, I was ashamed to leave the house.”
 
Anonymouse123 said:
I have been a long time purveyor of this site and have created an anonymous profile.

Just seeking some relationship advice.

Background: my wife and I have know each other since 17 years old, we are both 33 now, dated for approximately 5 years tied the knot and were married at 23, with 2 boys ages 6 and 3.

Recently she has been overprotective of her phone, I am not the one to go snooping but was finding it very odd. Last night I managed to get a hold of it when she was putting the kids to bed.

It turns out she has been chatting to her only ex boyfriend since June last year. She initially asked some law advice from him but has turned into a reminiscing about old times with some flirting. She sent him a pic of her from when they were going out in 2003. She is a Dr and has invited him for a consult to meet, he is a lawyer and invited her to go to court with him and she agreed. He is married with no children.

I do not think they have met as yet as nothing in the messages alluded to it.

I am so fusking lost at the moment, really don't know what to do or who to speak to. I want to confirm her tonight about this after kids are asleep. I could not sleep the entire night.

She has been the type to cheat and is quite against it. But fusk I don't know what is and what isn't anymore
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What do you want the outcome to be?
 
Hemi300c said:
A "cheater" never changes it spots.
I'd sit her down and tell her why it's over.
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They do change, it may take a while for some people to "fully" grow up or find what they really want in life but some people eventually do grow out of all the stupid crap they do
 
STS said:
They do change, it may take a while for some people to "fully" grow up or find what they really want in life but some people eventually do grow out of all the stupid crap they do
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Cheater alert
 
Steamy Tom said:
Cheater alert
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People mature at different rates based on various factors and those that they surround themselves with, which is why some 16 year olds can be more mature than many 26 year olds in regards to various topics. People who also don't have the opportunity to do stupid things earlier in life may want to do them later on, whereas the inverse is true that somebody could have been faithful their whole life, but just needed certain circumstances to cheat.

People are complex creatures. I could never cheat coz I'm too fekking lazy to be in a relationship in the first place, where some people find the energy to commit to a relationship, keep secrets in that relationship AND engage in another relationship seriously impress me
 
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